Lost Dignity

Chapter Twelve

I took a sip on my coffee as I watch the rain pour. Nasa isang cafe ako ngayon. I visited my mom and then I decided to drop by here to get a cup of coffee. Kasalukuyang umuulan ngayon sa labas. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang lamig ngayon lalo na at may aircon pa dito sa loob.

Habang pinapanood ko ang ulan sa labas, naalala ko yung gabi ng Halloween party. It was weird. Not the time when I was with Caleb. But the feeling that I felt.

It's a peculiar and an overwhelming little feeling. It crept through my veins and made a little impact in my system. And that's so weird.

Iwinaksi ko yun sa isipan ko atsaka muling pinagmasdan ang ulan. The coffee, the RnB music, the low temperature, the cafe's ambiance and the rain. Ang senti tuloy ng dating ko ngayon. Para akong babae na kakatapos lang ng break-up at nasa moving on stage na.

Nako, ano ba 'tong mga pinagsasabi ko?

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Lumingon ako sa pinanggalingan ng boses. Hindi ko alam kung masusurpresa pa ba ako ngayong nakita ko nanaman siya. Andito nanaman siya ngayon sa harapan ko.

Looks like destiny really wanted us to meet. I wonder the reason why. But one thing is for sure, God planned this. This is his decision and I trust him. As always.

I smiled. "Hello."

Unlike before, he looks more fine now. He looks better. He looks brand new. The excruciating pain that I saw in his eyes before was gone. His aura seems so light now.

"Hello."

Hindi gaya nung huling nagkita kami, maayos na ang buhok niya ngayon. Maaliwalas na din ang mukha niya. Nakangiti na din siya ng totoo ngayon at higit sa lahat ay mukhang hindi naman na siya lutang.

"How are you?"

"I'm fine. Your words made a great impact on me. Thank you."

"As long as other people are happy, I'm happy."

I don't know why but seeing other people's smiles light my world. I know that's weird but that's how I feel. Sobrang sarap sa pakiramdam na nakatulong ka sa kapwa. Sobrang sarap sa pakiramdam na malamang ang mga ngiting nasa mukha nila ay dahil sayo.

He made a hearty laugh. "You're too good to be true."

Napatingin ako sa kape kong lumalamig na. "You know, humanity is really weird. Kapag sobrang bait mo, parang ang weird sa paningin ng lahat. Na parang hindi ka normal. Na parang iniisip agad nila na hindi ka makasalanan, na ang banal banal mo. Gets mo ba?"

Sumingkit ang mga mata niya. "A little bit, I guess. Hindi ko matukoy kung anong pinupunto mo."

Napailing ako. "I'm weird and the thing that I said awhile ago is weird so let's just pretend that I didn't said that."

He chuckled again. "You're weird."

Tumango ako. "I know."

"You know what, I think we should hang out together. I mean, let's be friends."

Napakurap ako. Sa buong buhay ko kasi, si Gail lang ang naging kaibigan ko. I made some acquaintances pero hanggang dun lang yun. I don't even know some of my classmates' names until now.