The following week at school felt weird. Ashton and I completely ignored each other in first period, he obviously found that he had lost all respect from me and obeyed my rules. I'm well aware that if I were any other girl, and had shouted at Ashton like that, he would've grabbed me right back thrown me in his car. I knew he found it attractive when girls got angry, but I was furious and tears spilling down my cheeks didn't help my "hot" image.
Julie was no where to be seen at school. She never showed up and I felt bad. She needs someone to talk to and someone to help her, I hope she at least told her parents, but it's still an idiotic decision. And I don't know how I got wrapped up in this.
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Saturday night finally arrived and the family went out to a large dinner they do every weekend. I was asked to go along as always but I wanted to hang back because I really wanted a relaxing night to myself, the hard raindrops pounding against the windows helped calm my sense.
I heard a rather loud raindrop that sounded as like hail would. I quickly peered outside the window I had above my bed and noticed a body standing in the falling sky. The sun was going down but a light blue remained in the color. Illuminating enough light to where I could notice someone.
I quickly ran downstairs to the garage door and grabbed an umbrella. Then I scurried to the front door opening it. I jumped back when I found the figure standing in the front lawn now, I cowardly turned around and locked the door, instantly becoming afraid of what was outside.
Three knocks smacked from the door I was leaning against and my heart pounded. I peered through the side window and recognized the familiar curls that I ached to touch again but couldn't.
The door slowly creaked open and I stood in the frame, facing a soaking wet Ashton, with no umbrella or raincoat. He stood shaking and his teeth clattering. But I folded my arms and remained in my spot.
"This is for you." Ashton held out a limp red rose to me from all the rain, it had fallen. I was about to give in and take it, but my eyes travelled from the broken rose, back to Ashton, giving him an unsatisfying look.
"Did you really think this whole 'Crawling back to me in the rain and handing me a rose' stunt would actually work?"
"Uh, yeah, a little." He pulled a cheeky smirk and I scoffed. He stood shuddering in the kitchen before I was just beginning to watch him, standing there. He seems miserable.
"Please?" He remained shivering and I didn't want the boy to die of hypothermia so I invited him in. His shoes squished from the water filled shoes he'd worn. I ran up to the towel closet and grabbed the thickest one I could find, then hurriedly galloped down the stairs.
"Here." I threw the towel at him and he weakly caught it, barely moving his arms from their position. I folded my arms once again and stood awkwardly in the middle of the kitchen.
"Why're you here?" I asked.
"Because I want to explain."
"Explain what? You got a girl pregnant. You're going to be the father of a child." I emphasized increasing the size of his guilt.
"No I'm not."
"Of course you are! You're not leaving Julie and her kid behind. Trust me, I know what that's like-"
"No I'm not going to be a father because there is no child." His head hung low.
"What're you talking abo-"
"It died."
His eyes connected with my wide ones before he wrapped himself tighter in his warm towel.
"What..." I was breathless.
"She woke up two days ago and she said the baby had died."
"I'm sorry."
"Not her fault." He mumbled. "There's good and bad about this. I just, I just don't know what to do."
"Ashton, you've got it all wrong." I sat next to him.
"You don't do. You don't do anything. But you're gonna be a friend to her. And be there for her. Okay?" He nodded. I felt like a mother explaining to their child.
We sat there, the silence was too loud for the both of us but the rain interfered making it almost comfortable.
"Do you have any soup?" His glossed eyes making contact with mine.
"I'm pretty sure we have some." I replied with a smile replacing my laugh.
I began to warm up some chicken noodle soup from a can in the microwave before I heard the garage door begin to open. Ashton and I both looked at each other at the same time before we gathered himself quickly.
"Where's your car?" I asked.
"Across the street because I was trying to be romantic with the rock and the rain and the rose-hey those all start with 'R'-"
"Shut up you idiot!" He pulled a cheeky smirk on me before leaning down to my lips. I pushed on his chest, pushing him more out the door.
"Just friends, Irwin." I scolded.
"Oh baby," he lifted my chin for my eyes to meet his and I stopped pushing on him,"you and I both know that's not going to happen." My body became weak at his words and he pressed a kiss to my forehead before exiting my temporary home.
I can't completely forgive him. But he's broken. Julie is leaving him. I'm leaving him, and now he has no one. He deserves everything he has gotten, but forgiveness always comes before acceptance, but I don't know if I can forgive him for this mistake.
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- quick little update for my Colombian friend. And my little red head needs to bring me my fucking sand. Thanks
-dee
