Have Hope

Addictions

Andrew spent this past week fixing ties that he had with others that he walked out on, like his boys from Hanes and his parents who have heard little from him this past year. He kept in contact though, assuring me he was coming back.

I spent this past week continuing at school and I also got a job at a local daycare. I figured I could work there with my free time and still be able to see Hope, and I wouldn't have to worry so much about a babysitter while I was at school.

Dr. Jensen was proud of me for the way I handled Andrew's return, keeping my personal health in mind as well as Hope's.
Brennan and Leah were incredibly hostile toward him when he was over two nights ago for dinner and Hope was at Shea's. He told them about his reasoning for leaving, but it was to no avail. They still, reasonably, resented him for his decision to leave. Neither Andrew nor I blamed them for their hostility though.

Andrew has yet to meet Hope, by my decision. I wanted proof that he was sticking around and could resist any urge he had to drink from now until forever.

I'd never forgive myself if I allowed Andrew back into her life and a few months, or years from now, he were to leave again and break her heart. A girl's father should never be the first guy to break her heart. I want to protect her from that.

But he's proved himself to a certain extent by attempting to fix things with the people he was once close with.

Now he's on his way over while it's just Hope and I at home.

I told Brennan and Leah they could stick around, but they insisted that we handle this together. I appreciated their trust in my input of who to allow into my daughter's life.

Hope was sitting in front of the couch on her mat, playing with the toys dangling above her head. I sat on the couch watching her as all the different scenarios of how this night could go rang through my mind.

The knock on the door caught my attention and Hope's. She pointed toward the door before turning onto her tummy.

"Here we go, bibs," I murmured. I pushed myself off of the couch and stepped around Hope to get to the door.

"Hey, Andrew." I stepped aside for him to come in. I didn't want to be nervous, but I had no idea what to expect.

"Hey," he offered me a small smile. He slipped off his shoes and set them by the doormat. "Wow."

I followed his eyesight to see Hope crawling over to us. She didn't make it far, but she was close enough to see her obvious beauty.

"Come here, Hope." I kneeled down, urging her to continue crawling toward us. A smile spread across her face as she picked up her pace and reached out for my arms.

With Hope now resting on my hip, we turned toward Andrew again. A look of awe was the only emotion present on his face while Hope looked utterly curious as to who the stranger standing before her was.