The Piano Knows Something I Don't Know

Why can't guys wear eyeliner?

Why can't guys wear eyeliner?

"Ryan, what are you doing?" Patrick asked me as I stood in front of the bathroom mirror in Flack Hall, carefully drawing dark spirals around my eyes.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" I replied as my eyeliner pen moved just a little bit too far. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror again and decided that I would fix it after I was done talking to Patrick. "I'm going to the Guyliner Club meeting today, and I need to look my very best."

"I didn't know that Kale had a Guyliner Club," Patrick said as he adjusted his glasses.

"The first Guyliner Club meeting is today," I said. "Do you want to come with me?"

"No thanks," Patrick said.

"Suit yourself," I said as I put the finishing touches on my makeup. It had taken me a little bit longer than I expected, but it looked amazing, at least in my opinion. I put my eyeliner pens away and headed downstairs, and as I did, the other residents of Flack Hall gave me wide-eyed stares.

"Are you going to a costume party or something?" one girl who lived on the first floor asked me.

"No, I'm going to the Guyliner Club meeting," I said.

I had gotten similar reactions when I had worn eyeliner in high school, but I had learned to ignore other people's judgments. I've always believed in following what feels right and expressing yourself honestly, and over time, I've discovered that I'm the sort of guy who really enjoys wearing makeup. Wearing eyeliner had always felt right for me, regardless of any gender norms that might say otherwise. Determining what is right can be complicated sometimes (there's a whole branch of philosophy dedicated to it), but sometimes it's no more complicated than what your instincts say is right.

I walked across the campus, passing by rows of Greek houses on my way to the Pendragon Center. It was a lovely September afternoon, but I couldn't help but worry about the club meeting a little bit. What if the other members of the Guyliner Club didn't like me? Perhaps I was being petty, but I desperately wanted friends who shared my love for guyliner. I hadn't had anyone like that in high school, although so far, I had found that college students were a little bit more accepting than high schoolers were.

I opened the doors of the Pendragon Center, but I didn't see anyone in there other than a receptionist. Was this another cruel joke? I knew that my luck was bad, but this seemed particularly horrible. If God existed, was this His/Her/Their way of telling me not to wear guyliner? The thought was already making me feel a bit disenchanted.

I stood there awkwardly for a few minutes before the receptionist asked, "Are you looking for something?"

"Do you happen to know if this is where the Guyliner Club is meeting?" I asked.

The receptionist nodded and said, "They're upstairs."

I climbed upstairs until I spotted a group of four people sitting and chatting in an empty classroom. "Is this the Guyliner Club meeting?" I asked.

A rather familiar boy smiled and said, "See guys? I told you that we would get at least one new member!" He then turned to me and said, "Yes, this is the Guyliner Club meeting. I'm Gerard Way, the club president."

"I'm Ryan Ross," I said as I shook Gerard Way's hand.

I took a seat next to Gerard, who had his arm around the short, dark-haired boy sitting next to him. "Alright, why don't we all introduce ourselves to Ryan? I'll go first. I'm Gerard, I'm a senior here, I'm majoring in art, and I love guyliner! Frank, you're next."