"Wow, your hair is so long and pretty!"
Damn right it is. You know how fucking long it takes to wash this shit? I have actual visible biceps partially in thanks to doing my hair. I take better care of it than the rest of me, yes I know it's long, I can't jump in deep water with my hair down or the weight of it will give me whiplash. The fuck man. No, you cannot touch it, didn't I just tell you it takes fucking forever to get it to cooperate with me? Who the fuck do you think you are? Have I tried that specific conditioner you just mentioned? Yes. Yes I have. I know it's obscure and no one else has heard of it. I've tried it, trust me. Why do I wear braids every day? How the fuck else am I supposed to keep it without it getting caught in literally everything? Have you tried closing a car door only to get your hair stuck? I think the fuck not. This shit is two feet long. I haven't cut more than half a centimeter at once off in more than five years. Don't fuck with me, I could smuggle a small child across the Canadian boarder in this and no one would know. I have legitimately lost things in my hair and found shit with no knowledge of where it come from. I just took a plastic turtle out of my hair a few weeks ago and I have no fucking clue how it got there. This is weapon, if I'm not paying attention my ponytail might just take out your eye, don't even try to fuck with me. I have blinded myself by spinning to fast and I can do the same to you—OH FOR FUCKS SAKE, YOU CANNOT TOUCH IT.
Anyways, thanks for the compliment. I appreciate it.
(I'm in a bit of a mood if you can't tell)
YOU ARE READING
Fangirldom, a randomness book
RandomCurrently a randomness book. I cuss a lot. This is technically a follow up to Welcome Fangirls (the cringe) but it's a lot more chill and random thoughts and mostly shitposts but hopefully we'll both have a good time.
