Random crap

Complaints #1 (Minnesota complaint rants!)

"Oh the weather outside is frightful,

But the snow if sure delightful,

As long as you love me so,

Let it snow, let it snow, let it-"

NO!!!!

I'll be honest with y'all, I hate the snow.

Sort of.

Sure, white Christmas and all is nice. But you wanna know what absolutely sucks?! Minnesota weather (Temperatures referred to Fahrenheit)! Sure, we have snow, and we don't kill everybody with our heat, and we have over 10,000 lakes.

But the weather absolutely sucks at the worst time possible! Let's start with the Spring weather. Rain, wind, snow, rain, freezing rain, sun. All at the same damn time. Mostly, anyway. But 99% of the time it's either snowing, raining, or extremely windy. Now when the sun is just right, like, high 60s to low 70s, and the wind blows just right, it's perfect. The downside though is that this only happens once or twice the entire season. And when it doesn't do that, it rains. Hard. Like, sometimes I feel like a flood will start when it pours. Once it didn't stop raining for a week! Sure, it got rid or the snow and all.

Wait, no it didn't. Why? Because it turned into Freezing rain! Basically, freezing rain is rain drops turned into tiny ice shards that feel like bullets when the land on something. Worst part is, if there's snow (which 99% of the time there's is), it freezes over the snow. Into a thick sheet of slippery ice! Last January, I slipped on frozen snow rain and almost broke my hip from it. Sure I was coming back from a band concert and I was wearing nice clothes and all, so that doesn't help. I not only hit my hip on the ice, but it was the same side that I had put my mouthpiece in. Which was made of metal. I also hit my head really hard too (don't remember that though). Point is, Spring sucks in Minnesota.

Yeah, I know, I'm ranting and complaining. But I mean, come on! It's me we're talking about, when DON'T I complain?

Next season is Summer. Sure we don't have dry heat like Arizona or anything. But you wanna know what we do have?

10,000 lakes. If you've ever been to Florida, Hawaii, or southern Texas, you know what I'm talking about. These states are surround by water. Which causes humidity. Minnesota is humid as hell during the summer. All summer. It always stays in the high 70s to low 100s almost every day. It also rain during the summer too. And when it rains, it pours. Because Minnesota seasons are jerks. Rain causes more humidity. Doesn't help that during the Fourth of July, I have to do the parade. It's hot, humid, and we walk on the black pavement road.

Sometimes I wish the heat would just hurry up and kill me.

Humidity doesn't sound that bad. It's not dry heat, so it's automatically not bad. Here's the definition of Humidity for you:

"Humidity is the amount of water vapor present in the air. Water vapor is the gaseous state of water and is invisible to the human eye. Humidity indicates the likelihood of precipitation, dew, or fog. Higher humidity reduces the effectiveness of sweating in cooling the body by reducing the rate of evaporation of moisture from the skin."

Thank you Wikipedia. Now, because we have 10,000 lakes, the humidity is always extremely high. This causes everybody to sweat literally every ounce of water in our bodies to attempt to stay cool. But it never works. Yeah, Minnesotans complain a lot about the weather. I don't mind it personally, I just wish Mother Nature would at least give us time to adjust before trying to murder us.

Now, moving on to Fall. After having 90-100 degree weather for a total of three months, it immediately drops to 50-60s. Sure, the leaves turn colors and it's pretty and all, but there's always wind. And wind breezes go to 30-40 miles an hour. Making it super cold. Doesn't help that mid October, guess what comes? Snow. The snow comes in mid October, but it usually doesn't stay long. I think once in like '74 or something there was snow on Halloween? I don't remember. Guess what happened on November 1rst this year.

It snowed.

I can see why my dad wants to move to Arizona.

It did go away a few days later though, so that's good. Now, time to move on to winter!

Sure, the snow is fine, only on Christmas though. Best part is, it stayed that was for the rest of the month! Anyway. Winter here usually starts in the middle of November. And when it snows, it usually snows like 2-6 inches, and drops to below zero almost instantly.  The ice doesn't necessarily help either. On road trips, cars consistently get thrown into the ditch, and car crashes happen a heck of a lot more frequently. One year (2013) the snow didn't go away until late May to early June! It snowed on my birthday! Easy to say, it was miserable. I  pretty sure we skipped Spring then too, so... Anyway, it's bad enough the snow and ice are jerks on a daily basis, what's worse is that the snow "magically disappears" on Christmas Day!

It obviously comes back the next day, though.

So, there's the seasons in Minnesota for you. I hope I didn't change anybody's perspectives on this at all. I'd feel very guilty if I did that. So, on a more funny level; here's a story that revolves around winter!

I was walking down the school halls going to the bus (because my locker was across the building from where the busses were), and since it was below zero, I was wearing my sweatshirt (obviously), a heavy coat, boots, thigh gloves, and a face mask. Now, my glasses would fog up from time to time because my nose was under the face mask, so the air that I breathed would go upwards into the way of my glasses. So, as I was saying, I was walking down the hall, when this kid that like, 2 feet shorter than I was stopped me in my track and said, "You shall not pass!"

I just stood there, looking at him not sure what to do, breathing heavily so I could get air, and my glasses fogging up. Because of all of this snow gear I was wearing, the only thing the kid could see was my eyes. I swear on my grave bills, he whimpered as he left. I stood there for a second and thought, "Okay, so I'm intimidating like this. Also, what the hell just happened?" I feel like I was a little too harsh on the kid, even though the only thing I actually did was stand there.

So yeah that's the story of how I scared a kid by just looking at him. Um, imma leave now, byyeee!

Question of the day: What about the cover for Alolan Adventures?

Shut up I'm stalling like the lazy ass I am! (Also my dad abandoned me and went to Florida for a week...) Anyway, now I'm leaving for real, bye!!!!