The Wine in Your Thoughts

People will always judge you

When you spent your whole life watching people defining you as a person they think you are and didn't felt the same way for yourself, is the biggest regret in life.

The only way of making yourself happy has to start with yourself. People will always judge you for no matter what you do. Whatever you do, think that somewhere somehow someone wouldn't be satisfied with it. It's okay to feel down sometimes, but never let those be the definition of your life and how you grow. People will never be satisfied even if you do what they tell you to do. Don't let anyone drag you down the darkest place where they are and you can never come out. Don't put a mask that will never fits you just to satisfy them. If they think you're worthless don't let it affect you. Don't let it be something or a feeling that makes you doubt in yourself. It's not worth it. You don't think the same as them.

It's hard for you to think of all the things you want to do and can't have the opportunity to express in your way just because you're afraid to be judged. Afraid to let people down. But, what you don't know is you're letting yourself down for no reason. No reason to be at worst with yourself just to make others feel happy. Don't let people make any decision for you in order for them to feel good about themselves. They will laugh in your face when you fail. They will talk behind your back either way.
They won't be there when you need them the most. The hardest part is not only the way to please anyone. You find yourself thinking a lot of things about you that wasn't there before they claim to judge you. When you are feeling lonely they will never be there for you.
Suffering in silence when none knows what you are feeling. No one knows what you are dealing with. They choose to see what benefits them. They see what for them are good.

In the inside, your mind is battling with your feelings and nothing can come clear to you unless you're at peace with yourself. It's hard to choose what to control because nothing can be controlled.

Live your life as how you want to. It might be  hard for someone who constantly lived their whole life thinking and depending on what people will say but, now you only have to say fuck that. The life you are living is yours. No one has anything to say about it. You are the writer of your own life story. Make history for you not for what people want to see. If they are in your position they wouldn't want to anyone decide for them anyway.Think about your only way to be happy. And live it. If it bothers them let it be. If it's frustrating them let them go crazy. Fuck making people proud. Make yourself proud instead. They can't choose your happiness. Be you and no one else.
That's the way of living.

-🍷💭