Forgot to Remember

Saturday

Saturday 

Five days had gone by since Ant's ...disappearance. But with each passing day the pain Dec felt only got worse.
"Decky how long are you going to keep Ant and Dec productions closed?" Sarha asked as she watched Declan shuffle around the house and rearrange the furniture.
"Ant doesn't like these silly chairs. I think I'll change them." Dec said completely ignoring Sarha's question. Sarha grimaced at Dec's back. His unpredictable behaviour was annoying her completely. Dec's moods kept swinging between denial and depression. This was one of his denial hours. And his denial was fuelled more by Christine's claim that 'until his body is found Ant cannot be declared dead.' Sarha loved her mother's optimistic streak but in this case the optimism wasn't helping. His back still turned to Sarha, Dec said, "I know you think I'm mad but can't I fantasise for just a few minutes that the next time that door opens it'll be Anth walking in. That he'll kiss me; ask if I need any help before he heads into the bathroom to take a shower. And yes I will go back to Ant and Dec productions again. I'm going back on Monday."
"Decky I'm just worried about you. After all that's happened, wouldn't it be better if you sold it?"

Declan turned around for the first time to face Sarha.
"To sell you need the agreement of both owners and Ant isn't here. So how can I sell?" he said with a sad smile. Sarha frowned.
"But didn't he transfer all rights to you?"
Still smiling Dec informed her, "The papers that said I was the full owner have been torn into four neat pieces and then been run through the shredder."
With that he left a stunned Sarha standing in the middle of the living room. Having to look after her kids, Sarha couldn't stay in London any longer. Christine who didn't like to stay in London for too long, preferred to go back to Newcastle as well. So on Saturday afternoon they headed back.
"Call us if you need anything," Sarha said sadly to Dec as she climbed into the car. Knowing full well that she could do nothing further for her brother's boyfriend, who she had hoped she could one day call her brother in law. Christine hugged Dec tightly.
"Officially, he's still just missing," she said vehemently, refusing to give up hope. Dec hugged her tighter hoping that some of her optimism would rub off on him. After the two of them left, Dec turned to the people standing around him.

"Can I have the house all to myself just for tonight and tomorrow?"
They all started to speak at once. Dec raised his hand to silence them.
"I promise I won't do anything foolish. It's just that I always wanted one night and one whole day alone with Ant, with no interruptions."
"But..." Anne began to argue
"Mam, please! I'll call you tomorrow night."
Giving him one last worrying look, one by one Anne, Martin and Clare left. Once everyone left him alone Dec went shopping. He picked out all of Ant's favourite food and two bottles of champagne. He bought a few knick knacks. Then he walked to his last stop - the jewellery store. He stood looking at the rings on display for the longest time; wishing that he had Ant's size. He stared at his own fingers. They were a little bit chubby and short. Ant's fingers on the other hand were longer than his and slimmer. He closed his eyes and remembered how they would caress his skin when they made love. So his ring would definitely have to be a size smaller than Dec's. He entered the store and pointed out the ones that he had chosen. For the first time in his life the Geordie was thankful to have that piece of rectangular plastic called a credit card in his wallet.
He already knew what he wanted inscribed in Anthony's ring.

Back home, he cooked at leisure; there was no one to hurry for. He set the table for two, poured the champagne into two glasses and then sat down to eat. He toasted the chair opposite him and took a sip of champagne. But the empty chair mocked him. So he just chugged down all the champagne in one go and refilled his glass. After his third glass Dec realised that Champagne definitely wasn't the medicine he needed so he dug up the bottle of vodka that he had stashed away. He took a few long gulps of the burning liquid and felt his head happily hum.
He was drunk and the pain had slightly numbed. He took out the ring box from his pocket. Flipping it open he stared at the two identical gold bands. Taking out the larger one he slipped it onto his left hand's ring finger. His eyes focused on the vacant chair he spoke

"I, Declan Joseph Oliver Donnelly, take you Anthony David McPartlin, to be my husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death do us part.
Just as this ring has no end or beginning, so shall my love for you be. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am, and all that I shall become."

The food lay forgotten as Dec stumbled over to the couch in tears and collapsed onto it. He soon fell into an alcohol induced, disturbed sleep.
It was their wedding reception, their first dance together as a married couple. Ant looked at him, the hazel eyes sparkling like emeralds. Ant smiled at him before he gently captured Dec's lips with his own. Declan felt the lips touch his and let Ant's intoxicating scent surrounded him. He knew it was a dream so he just savoured the dream kiss. Suddenly he felt a hand gently caress his cheek as the kiss continued and realised it wasn't a dream after all. He opened his eyes and stared at the person kissing him. He scrambled away from the touch and the mischievously smiling face. As soon as his brain registered who had kissed him he let out a blood curdling scream.