he started to cry. "look i love you. so much. i know things are hard. you've recovered once. remember when me and your brother helped you lie to your family and you got help? for seven fucking years you were doing amazing. you can do it again. i pro...
so a week later it was the award show. my plus one was mason. R5 has been nominated to! They didn't have plus ones as they were a band. Brendon had been nominated and chose Sarah. Selena wasn't attending but I knew why. She only just got out of rehabilitation. She was going to stay home with Courtney (who had made up with Ross) and Savannah.
I was so excited. I was Selena's plus one for a few award shows which I loved and appreciated but this was my first time actually going to probably win. It felt weird. But the award show was tomorrow. We made it to our hotel room (the award show was in New York so...flight) and me and mason had to share of course. But Riker mostly hung in my room. Everyone went to go and look for some food places while I cleared up.
I was half way done then someone knocked on the door. I sighed and opened the door. "Hi my name's Patrick Stump" a familiar guy held his hand out. "AMERICAN PHYSCO!" I screamed. PATRICK STUMP WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. "holy shit" I mumbled. "Aw are you a fan?" He asks me. "Uhh of course!" I exclaim. Brendon walked over holding a beer - as usual. "Knew she'd love it" he smiled. "Did you do this?" I ask him. "No my dick did" he said sarcastically.
"I can't believe this" I whispered to myself. "Emma stop talking to yourself" brendon walked in. "shut up!" i shoved him.
after they went I finished tidying up. Then everyone came back. mason went to the bathroom and Riker laid next to me on the floor. "I saw your Snapchat" he grinned. "I can't beleaf I met fall out boy" I smiled. "Ross met them on the way out" he said. "They're so nice. Why's everyone so nice? And then I'm such a bitch" I say. "A adorable bitch" he replied, kissing my nose. I laughed and he did to.
"Let's explore. I'm gonna ask the others what they think" he kissed my head and went to ask the others. I smiled and then went on my phone. Then frowned.
Ugly
Ew wtf
She has so much acne OMG
She's so ugly wtf
Tears brimmed in my eyes. Was I really that ugly? I grabbed a make up wipe and gently rubbed it against my face. Even with make up I was ugly. I got it all off and looked at myself.
I was nothing. No wonder why Riker left me so much. He couldn't stand seeing my ugly face. I touched my face with my hands and looked at myself, tears filling my eyes. Then the door opened "Hey Emma we've decided to go explore a bi- what are you doing?" He asks me. "Oh "just about to get properly ready" I replied. "No baby you look cute. Let's go-" he grabbed my hand and i pulled away. "Give me 5 minuets" I said, taking my primer out of my make up bag.
I did my make up and my hair. I was wearing this right now:
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I grabbed my phone and held back my tears, finding the others. Riker looked at me oddly. I didn't usually wear this much make up anymore so it was probably different for him.
We got into the van and drove around. I sat in between Ross and Riker, playing with my hands. Riker kept asking if I was ok and I nodded. We got out of the car and then I mumbled something about needing the puke and ran into an alley way and cried. I hated feeling like this. I hated life.
After five minuets I wiped my eyes and went back to the others. Rydel was waiting for me by the van and guided me to this nearby restaurant. I sat next to her and mason, my heart pounding. I had to be okay. Riker looked suspicious.
We went to the park and everyone played football minus me. I sat on a bench on my phone. The hate was horrible. I saw Sarah had posted a tweet saying "Be Kind" which made me smile. She knew what was going on. She's such an angel. I went on the messages app.
"Should I speak up?" I asked her. "Totally. Me and Brendon did and it really helped. You deserve happiness" She was too kind! "Brb crying @ ur kindness" I replied.
@emmajgomez: Stop being unkind its so boring
Comments spammed in. @virtuesarah: always loved you! XX @factofr5: your so lucky to be so pretty and your cared for :( @ionar5: your too lucky to have Riker @sarahurie: you go girl! 💕💕
I smiled at Sarah's comment. "Your smiling like an idiot" Ratliff informs me. "Guess I am one then" I replied.
