Harris J - not as it seems😕

12- Radley Cenetarium Rehabilitation

ONE OF THE MOST EMOTIONAL CHAPTERS OMG. 

PLAYY THIS WHILE READING THIS CHAPTER  IF YOU WANT IT MAKES IT MORE EMOSH.

Same day...

Harris' pov

I was just thinking about everything... I was thinking about how hard it was going to be. I was thinking about how much Dina has put up with. I was thinking about how many chances she had given me, how understanding she was. How much I was going to miss her.

 I didn't know how I was going to do it, It was an addiction. I was scared ngl, it was the only thing that helped me cope. I remembered the reason I started smoking it in the first place. That was the one thing I didn't wanna think about. I started crying, I tried to hide it from her as I thought she wouldn't see because she was in the bathroom but she came out when I didn't expect it. She saw me do the one thing I never wanted her to see. Me cry.

"Harris.." She said coming and sitting right next to me on the sofa. "Stop baby" She said resting her head on my chest and putting her arms around my waist. I wiped my tears.

"Im supposed to protect you" I said "Im supposed to make you feel safe. Im supposed to be here for you, here with you, here when you need me. I fucked that up by ever smoking that shit. If, god forbid, anything happens to you while I'm away how am I going to ever live with myself knowing that I wasn't here to prevent that from happening. You are the most important thing in my life. Your my wife. Your the person thats been my side like no-one else has. You understand me, you put up with me, you help me. And this is how I repay you, by making you feel worried, scared and uncertain for whats going to happen next. Im so sorry Dina I just cant stop myself. Even after you came into my life. Its something I need." 

I heard her sniffle. She stayed in the same position. Her arms wrapped around me and her head resting on my chest.

"Why did you smokeit?" She said stroking my hip.

"Na" I said "Im not ready to talk about that" I said. Although she was meant to be the one person that knew everything about me, I wasn't ready yet.

"Im here for you always, just know that. Whenever your ready to talk about it let me know" She said still stroking my hip.

"I will baby girl" I said playing with her hair. I could sense that she was scared but there was nothing I could do. We had to do this, for the better. "your so beautiful"

"Stoppp" she said smiling for a second. She got out of her position and sat on my lap facing me. When she finally kissed my mouth, everything went quiet, like the moment of silence between lightning and thunder. This kiss was the kind that breaks open the sky. She stole my breath and gave it back. It showed me that every other kiss I've had with her had been wrong. This was the most meaningful one. We pulled away.

"That was different" I said. She smiled at me and we repeated this over and over. I kept my arms wrapped around her.

 It was time for Isha so we both went to do our Wudu. I prayed in the living room and she prayed in the bedroom.  After a while we put a movie on and we watched it all through the night. I made us some noodles and she sat next to me, her head resting on my shoulder. I had grabbed the blanket from behind the sofa and covered her in case she was cold. We both felt warm. together. She fell asleep in my arms. I kept her close to me. I never wanted to let go. I wanted her to be with me forever, where she was protected. I had set my alarm for 8 am the next morning. The car from the rehab centre was going to pick me up at 10. I fell asleep an hour after Dina, both on the sofa, on top of each other.