A Leap in Time ~ An Infernal Devices Fic

Tessa Spends the Night

"It is as great a thing to love as to be loved. Love is not something that can be wasted."

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Tessa didn't question it when, after having dropped a fuming Gabriel at his home, ignoring his protests that he wouldn't let a Herondale touch his car, not even to drive Tessa home, Will dropped her at her front doorstep. She couldn't think anything but that she was glad to be out of the hot, awkward car, and not feel the press of the words no one was saying hurt her head. So, it wasn't until he drove away that she realized she wasn't supposed to be there. She had completely forgotten she'd run away not eight hours earlier.

She had took the plans to be immediate; she'd assumed, and now she felt like an idiot staring up at her townhouse and thinking it, they would all be as desperate as she to leave, to find the answers, to escape- It hadn't occurred to her that Will wouldn't want to go. That she had no idea if Charlotte and Jem or anyone had any intention of following through on the quest which she thought had driven an intense desire to find the truth into all of their heads, not just hers.

It appeared she was wrong.

So, now she was an idiot, standing in front of a house she couldn't return to. They must have realized she was gone. She could only hope and pray that they wouldn't call the police and report her missing. But while she could run, could disguise herself and hide, she couldn't crawl back into her room like a coward- She felt her pride stung just at the thought. She couldn't go back and now it was twilight, in an empty London street, and she had nowhere to go.

And her suitcase was still in the back of Gabriel's car.

She fought against the flutter of panic that rose in her chest. She had been an idiot, more than anyone else she'd actually thought- And now where would she go? She'd have to go back, at least to get some clothes, at least to- Where would she eat? She was suddenly painfully conscious of the ache in her stomach, remembering that she hadn't eaten almost anything that day, except a meager breakfast before she had showered. Why did that feel like a lifetime ago?

She sat down on the curb, feeling numb. She suddenly felt lower than low, like she was five years old again and all she wanted was to throw herself into Aunt Harriet's arms and know it would be alright. But it wouldn't. She remembered Will's swift agreement to her accusation that she was the last woman he'd want in the world. She tried to tell herself she didn't care. She didn't know him. She wasn't special, or from anywhere different, or a person from a different time stuck in her own twenty-first century body, she was just Tessa, she was an idiot, and she was stuck on a curb for what would probably be forever.

She actually laughed at loud, a little deranged laugh but still a laugh, at the realization she was on a curb again. Just like she had been before any of this had really started. Crying on a curb. Maybe curbs could be her always.

"What's so funny?" a voice asked good naturedly from behind her.

She nearly screamed, leaping to her feet and spinning around to face the smiling, angelic face of James Carstairs, looking pale and sickly, but in what could only be defined as a good mood.

She clutched at her chest, trying to regain her sanity. "You- holy crap- You terrified me!"

He laughed at her, his eyes crinkling at the corners, looking vaguely apologetic. "I'm sorry. I wouldn't have said something if I'd thought you were so deep in thought."

"I- I was sort of," she admitted, staring at him in the remnants of her shock.

He wore yet another pull over cardigan, no dress shirt underneath, the edge of his pale collarbone visible at the neck. He held a cane loosely in his right hand, a gnarled wooden thing that felt wrong with the picture of him. She glanced back up at him and saw that his mouth had tightened into a line, the crinkles on his eyes gone.