January 1st, 2018

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It's a new year.

Hopefully this one will be better than 2017.

We're gonna be staying in Hawaii for the rest of the week.

I have to admit, it was pretty fun waiting for the ball to drop last night. I got in the water and swam with Hawaii, Miami, and Florida. Most of us even went snorkeling and had crab and lobster for dinner. I didn't want to eat but Mar gave me puppy eyes and somehow knew I was hungry. It was pretty good. I can't remember the last time I laughed so much.

I bet I gained so much weight.....

It was nice to pretend that everything  was okay, with everything going on in the world.

It was nice to pretend that my family actually gave a damn about me.

When the ball dropped, Mattie looked at me, smiled, and said they loved me.
He didn't seem like he was lying..... But I can't be sure.

Then Georgia, Montreal, and Baja California came up and hugged me. 

They're pretending aren't they?

Well, even if they are..... It's nice to think that someone cares..... To bad it's gonna end soon.

Well, I gotta go soon. We're going back to the beach to swim and have a bonfire.

Btw, I can't find my razors that I came with and the knifes always seem to be gone.

They don't know that I cut, do they?

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And question: Do you guys think this book is moving too fast with Alfred self-harming and binging to his family low-key trying to stop him?

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