Don't Wake Me Up || Discontinued

Chapter Eighteen - The Reason

[Goals for the chapter: READS - 220 // VOTES - 3]

"Louis? Is that you?" I shook my hand, not wanting to attempt at speaking again. I was too exhausted - physically and mentally - to even bother. "Louis?"

Harry placed his hand back on mine, kneeling beside me. I made my eyes open, giving me a blurry look around the room, and the familiar head of hair I loved so much. He blinked. "Yea," I said quietly, my voice growing normal again. I rubbed my eyes, the room coming into view.

"You're alive. . ." Harry said, staring at me as I watched his movements hazily. I nodded. Tears filled his eye again as he got up and sat next to me on the bed, his hand not coming off mine. "Did you. . ."

"I heard it all," I said quietly, already knowing what Harry wanted to ask. I knew of his little fantacies now; I knew of everything that went on in his head. I thought it was sweet, with the fact that despite the suffering he has to go through he's still willing to stay with me forever, nonetheless stay here for me. I have never felt so important.

"Shit." he muttered, getting up and reaching his hands above his head. "So, what do ya think?" I smiled.

"I think it's absolutely amazing, but. . ." I said, watching Harry's eyes go from glowing with happiness to droppy and sad as they were before. I paused, then continued, "Her name is going to be Nicholette. And she's going to be a big sister. We wil have her from when she is a baby, like real parents. K?"

Harry's face flushed with relief, his whole body relaxing. He smiled, then grabbed my hand again and sat down, picking up paper and opening a blue pen from the drawer with his teeth. "Got it." he said, writting all i had said down in a sloppy cursive. He shoved it in hispocket and capped the pen, throwing it back into the drawer and slamming it shut. He paused, then took it back out. He began tyo write, "And his name will be Tyler, and he will have a big sister. He will also e ours from a little boy, like real parents." I smiled, watching as Harry wrote down our future children's information, as if we were ready to do this tomorrow. He tapped the pen on his leg. "We will buy a house," he said, wuikcly writing stuff down on the cluttered paper, "And it shall be white. Or brick. Or creme. Or. . .What do you think, Lou?"

"I don't think the color matters, Mr. Future." I joked, staring at his green his.

"True. How about toys? Baby toys?"

"We can figure this out later. You're insane."

"No, im preparing." That was one thing about Harry. No one really knew this but me: he was slightly OCD, and in a serious sense. LAst year, around April, he was disgnoised with Obessive-Compulsive disorder, and living with him, you tend to see his true colors. It was sometimes hard, because he did have panic attacks where my socks werent in the right spot, but in the end, it was nice to have someone like Harry to put me inmy place every once in a while. I have leanred a lot from his organization, me being a total slob. It's not like he was totally involved in his organization 24/7, or had his whole life planned out down to the time he used the loo - just bits and pieces. Sometimes, though, he had these Hours of Uncertainty as i like to call them, in which hedecided to neaten everything up and change most places for many things, thinking that it didnt look good there or something. During these times, he also planned like a lunatic, yet claimed he was preparing - for twenty years later. He was in one of these moods right now, and i've learned it's easie to just roll with it.

"Right. So, i think Tyler's middle name should be James. Tyler James. . .?"

"Styles," he said, clicking his tongue. He wrote it down on he paper. Tyler James Styles, just perfect. Just like his daddy."

"Which one?" i asked, rasing an eyebrow.

"You," he said, punching my shoulder playfully. "As for Nicholette, it will be Ann. Without the 'e', for measures. Nicholette Ann Styles. Our babies!"

"I love it," i said, reading the paper Harry had planned our life out on. "Oh, and Louis William Tomlinson-Styles. And Harry Edward Styles."

"Mister Harry Edward and Louis William [Tomlinson] Styles. I already love it." I smiled.

"Along with Nicholette Ann Styles and Tyler James Styles. There will be generations of Styles to come."

"Live on the legacy, bro," Harry said, capping the pen again and placing both the paper and pen aside. He squeezed my hand, then kissed me softly. "I'm glad you're okay."

"Me too." i said, my eyes filling with tears.

"I'd be lost without you."

"Now that i think of it, it was a stupid idea. It seemed like the only way out, you know? I sat and let Zayn hit me, then sat and watched as you hit him back, as he tried to fight back. Then I locked myself in the bathroom, not knowing who would come out winner. It was my fault. Mine. Mine. Mine. I wanted out, so i did so. I wrote in my blood to save me from leaving, then locked the door and made a death salad. It almost killed me. Last time i have a pill salad. . .I'll stick to lettuce."

"You better," he said, staring at me sharply, "Because it wasn't your fault; I should've known. Plus, you didn't make him hit you - he just did for whatever stupid reason. Either way, although you wanted out because the fact i beat his arse, by the way, pushed you over, i never would leave you, especially for that. I love you, Louis, so, very much. Without you, I'm nothing. I'm back to being little 'ole Harry, the one who can't do shit for himself, the one who is just going through the motions, waiting for an escape. You were my escape."

"I love you."

"I love you more."

[A/N: wowowowo thank you for 200 reads aw

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