Broken

Chapter 16

Louis

Harry's words sting my skin like wasps. I'm in this thing too deep with him and it needs to stop. No-one knows personal shit about me like that and he's not going to be the first. I've let this stupid thing go on for far to long and it's changing me. I'm not gay. I don't like him like that. I like girls. I'm such a fucking idiot for letting this happen. 

I pack up my stuff and practically run out of class. I can't look at him any longer. I keep on running until I reach the car-park, jumping straight into my car and speeding away from the school building. I need a drink. 

Harry

After our lesson I immediately text Louis. 

- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. Can we talk? - 

An hour passes with no reply so I text again. 

- Louis...are you okay? Are we okay? I'm worried... - 

I fight the urge to go to his house as the bell rings signalling that the school day is over. I know he's deliberately ignoring me. I didn't think that what I said was that bad for him to react like this, I must be missing something. I'm so confused. I text him one last time and head home. 

 - I'll see you later tonight then - 

He'll have to talk to me then and he can't avoid me forever. Maybe some time apart will calm the situation and things will all be back to normal again. It's just a stupid silly bicker, it's totally normal...healthy even. 

*                                         *                                     * 

Jay gets to my house just after 10pm already slightly drunk and way too excited for Niall's party. I guess it is a pretty big deal with Louis' group being the most popular in our school and Jay and I being in the year below. The whole drive to the party Jay goes on and on about all the girls he's planning on getting with tonight; I don't have the heart to tell him that his night might not go exactly that way. 

As we walk in through the front door my stomach cramps with nerves. You're fine Harry, It's just Louis...your Louis. Jay hands me a drink and I down it instantly in an attempt to settle my nerves. Looking around the house, the party's packed with people in the year above, with a few faces that I've never seen. Jay and I must be some of the youngest here. I check my phone to find that it's already nearly 11pm and still no sign of Louis, or text. I go to all the usual spots in the hope of finding him; the living room, bustling kitchen, outside the front of the house and the garden, but nothing. 

I quickly tell Jay, who's busy talking to a group of girls on the stairs, that I'm going to the bathroom upstairs. I need a minute to myself so I take the bottle of Vodka into the bathroom and lock the door behind me. I slump down behind the door and erupt into hysterical tears. He doesn't want me anymore and I'm not even surprised. I take swig after swig from the bottle ignoring the burn that hits my throat. I drink until the room starts to spin and my tears dry up. Heaving my body up I lean over the sink and stare at my blurry reflection staring back at me mockingly. The Harry I see smirks, almost silently laughing at my swollen eyes and chapped lips. He places his hands on my cheeks and wipes away the evidence of tears, pulling my face into a fake smile. With a deep breath, and the empty bottle, I leave the bathroom and stumble into the closest room next to it. I close the door with the darkness wrapping around me, spinning around to find Louis kissing a girl on the bed in front of me.