Youth | Lynn Gunn

Chapter Seven

And we're changing all the time
Maybe the same old fears, what have we here?

                     
                                  Four Months Treatment

"Mr and Mrs Gray, the treatments aren't doing what they are supposed too."

The doctor placed the paperwork done, his arms coming to rest on his desk as he clasped both his hands together.

My mother and father looked to me, their eyes welling up as they searched for some kind of reaction on my face.

"Well, what does this mean?" My father asked, his voice cracking with each word.

"She is gonna need surgery or she can continue to live with this and it spread. We are gonna remove the mass that has spread." The doctor stood up and placed the file in his cabinet.

My mom looked to me, her hand going to mine as she looked back to the doctor. Tissues crumbled in her hand as she held them to her mouth.

"She is getting the surgery." My father's voice stern, his voice showing his anger as he answered for all of us.

"Now Mr. Gray, i understand but this is Miller's decision. She is of age and needs to decide what's best."

I looked up from the ground, i looked around the room. Everyone's eyes on me as they searched for something to come from me. I looked to the doctor, "I guess just go with what my father said."

"Okay can we do that." The doctor smiled.

He wrote down on the small calendar that sat on his desk, the paper being ripped in the silent room as he handed a piece of paper to my mother.

She read the paper and looked up to the doctor, "Surgery is tomorrow."

He nodded and handed another piece of paper to me, my grip letting go of my moms as i read it aloud. The worse side effects of this surgery, the things and possibilities that could happen.

Possible death, possible lose of functioning the said body part, nausea, vomiting, and not all of the mass being removed.

I tossed the paper down to the ground as i looked to the nurse, "Kaci, i want to go. I don't want this."

She nodded and pushed me out of the room, my hands fiddling with bracelet that had been given to me by Lynn. Tears falling down my cheeks as i replayed everything.

I laid in the bed, my back turned to the window of the hospital room. Lynn opened the door, her voice cheery and happy. A sound that would normally give me joy.

"Miller!"

She sat on the edge of the bed, her hand at my lower back tracing circles. A soothing touch for over the past months.

"Hey, i have good news."

I turned to look at her, "What?"

I sat up in the bed, my hands holding my knees to my chest.

"I'm going home." She smiled, her green eyes sparkling more then usual.

I did my best to show some sort of happiness for her, some of emotion.

"Congratulations Lynn." I grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

"I'm going home soon." She smiled as she pressed a kiss to my forehead.

"Oh god, i gotta go pack." She smiled and ran out of the room.

Her boots disappearing, the silence of the room filling the space again. The thoughts i had been battling hitting again. I got up out of the bed, my legs shaking as i flipped the light switch off. I shut the door and closed the curtains.

I climbed back in the bed and faced the window again, my world crashing even more as i just pretended to be sleep. My fingers running along the bracelet that rested on my wrist.

LG & MG

The door swung open again, two whole hours later. Lynn stood at the doorway, her hands clutching a teddy bear as she waited for me to move or even look over to her.

She moved to the bedside table, she placed the teddy bear and a piece of paper. She had wrote
down her phone number. The teddy bear placed on top of it as she pressed a kiss to the back of my head.

"I love you Miller Dawn Grey."

She walked out of the room, closing the door behind her. She looked back with every step, some sort of hope that i would come out. Some sort of hope that i would stop her.

Everyone was leaving me, Alex, Brian, and now Lynn. All of them getting better and i was just getting worse, getting sicker.

The clock read 9am, the doctors had prepared the room. The handed me a pillow to rest my head as they covered my mouth with a mask that would help me fall asleep.

I woke up, my vision blurred as i looked around the room. The doctor and my parents around me as they discussed everything.

"Did i already have surgery?" I asked, my speech blurred.

The room going dark again as i passed out, my heart beat pounding into my ears.