4 weeks since that night in his bedroom. 4 weeks since he said "I love you". 4 weeks since I said "I love you, too". 4 weeks since we lyed in his bed, listening to Mayday Parade. 4 weeks since we said that we want to be more than friends.
Now we are in his backyard, sitting on a swing set that has been desprate for the butts of children. (a/n I am gonna put in some tfios so be ready.) I softly swayed the swing back and forth while Luke rambled on about some new band's album. He stopped talking and called my name.
"Yes Luke?" I said
"Kadee, do you realize that trying to keep you distance from me will not lessen my affection for you?" I cocked an eyebrow at him.
"Are you suddenly Augustus Waters?" I laughed.
"I don't know. Are you Hazel Grace?" He retaliated.
"Maybe after I say this. Luke, I am a grenade. One day I'm gonna blow up and I would like to try and minimize the casualties, okay?" I ask him.. He looked up from the ground and smiled at me.
"Okay." He giggled. It looked like it was gonna rain, so I told Luke goodnight and started go to the gate when Luke's hand grabbed my hand. "Luke, I've gotta go."
"Wanna do something crazy?" He asked me. I cocked an eyebrow, again. "Like what?" He bowed down before speaking again.
"May I have this dance?" I giggled. I curtsied and said, "My pleasure." He took out his phone and put on Little Things. He set his phone in his iHome that happened to be already outside. He came back over to me. I put my arms around his neck and he put his hands on my waist. Once it got to the first chorus, my head was resting on his chest and he was softly singing me the lyrics.
"It's you, it's you, it's you they add up to and I'm in love with you and all these little things..." He sang. I took my head off of my chest and smiled at him.
"I'm in love with you too, Luke." He smiled also. He started to lean in and I knew exactly what he was doing. I couldn't wait any longer so I grabbed his adorable face and put my lips on his. Our lips soon moved in sync. The flashbacks of my first kiss came back to mind.
FLASHBACK
"Look at all the history here, Austin!" I said, holding my arms out. This year's sophmore class raised enough money to go to Amsterdam. My boyfriend, Austin, and I decided to go to Anne Frank's house. I walked over to Austin and he put his arms around me.
Austin had osteosarcoma, bone cancer, so he knows the pain of going through cancer. He amputated his leg and has been cancer free ever since. We've been dating for a few months, and have never kissed. Some people call us Hazel and Augustus, because we both have cancer and like the book. Just, Austin hasn't died.
We broke the hug and I looked at a picture of Anne Frank. She was so strong and brave, I can't imagine how scared she must of been. Austin came up behind me. He looked at the same picture I was. I turned around to face him. He looked into my eyes. I couldn't take it anymore, so I grabbed his face and kissed it. He attached his hands to my waist and kissed me back. I thought I would never kiss him.
I heard applause in the background, and it felt like deja vu. But, this was my first kiss. Wait, didn't this happen to Hazel and Gus in TFIOS? It did! Ok, now we're Hazel and Gus.
END OF FLASHBACK
Me and Austin had dated for a year, until he passed away. Worst day of my life. But, that is the past. I can't always live in the past, but sometimes it's so hard not to. I just focused on Luke.
He bit my lip for entry, but I teased him. He pulled back and pouted. I guess we were so focus on each other that, we didn't notice it started pouring.
"Goodnight, Luke." I said. I smiled at him, pecked his lips, and walked out the gate.
-
I was sound asleep when my eyes flew open. It feels like there a explosions going on in my head, my chest felt tight, and I couldn't breath. I hold my chest and I check my nose to see if my tubes were still there. They were.
I scream. I scream as loud as I can. I just scream, no particular words. My mom comes running in and she has the look of terror on her face. She scooped me up in her arms and carried me out of my room.
I couldn't say anything. I couldn't scream either. I just layed in my mother's arms, crying into her shirt. She carried me to the car and layed me in the backseat. I layed there, listening to my mother talk to the hospital on the phone and drive. I would usual scold her, but now is not the time.
In this moment, I want to die. I want to just be in a coffin, motionless. The weight of cancer would be lifted off my shoulders and the fear of dieing of cancer would be gone. The pain would also be gone, and the cancer would be gone. I had soon fallen into a deep slumber.
-
I woke up in the ICU. I knew it was the ICU because I was alone, and I didn't have my usual boyband posters surrounding me. I looked around for the assistance button. I found a button that had the word nurse written in bold white letters. I pressed and a woman in her mid-twenties came in.
"Hello, Kadee. My name is Lucy, your nurse." She smiled. She wore glasses on the bridge of her nose with her hair pulled up into a high ponytail. She had nothing but mascara and chap stick on for makeup. She also had a light Aussie accent, like Micheal's.
"Hello, Lucy, my nurse." She chuckled at walked out for a few seconds, than returned with a cup in her hands. "Want some ice chips?" She asked. "Yes, please." I responded. She pulled up a chair next to my bed and sat down. She started spooning me ice chips.
"You've been out for a few days," she said, getting up to get more ice chips, "nothing's really happened. An artist released a new song, a person died, and a person lived. Hey, who's the boy waiting out in the waiting room?"
"What does he look like?" I asked.
"Blonde hair, lip piercing, about six feet tall, says his name is Luke." Shit, Luke is here? How did he know?
"Uh, he's my, uh, let's say boyfriend." I awkwardly said. She had an unconvincing look on her face.
"Your, uh, boyfriend?" She mocks. "Yes, well, sorta. More like friends with benefits. Is he allowed in here?" I asked.
"Technically, no. But, I could probably tell the front desk that he's your brother, than they will let him in." She got more ice chips and gave me 3 more spoonfuls. She set them next to me and went outside. I looked out the window, waiting for another person to walk through my door. I turned my head to see Luke.
His hair is messy, his eyes look red and puffy - from lack of sleep and crying, maybe - and he was still wearing the same clothes that I saw him in when I left his house.
"Hi," I mumbled. He came over to me and smashed his lips onto mine. We kissed for about 2 minutes before I ran out breath.
"Don't ever leave me, okay?" He said.
"Okay."
