kookie's diary || vkook ✔️

03.

      jungkook placed his arms on the desk and rested his head on it. he lets out a sigh, a long sigh and ruffles his hair, and ducks his head on his arms again. today was especially exhausting, and exasperating, for so many reasons that he can't even begin to count, the biggest one still being his missing diary. it's only been two days but it's driving him real crazy to the point that he's getting sleep deprived and that he cannot answer questions correctly anymore. he feels shit, he finds things utterly shit, and he doesn't know whether it's because of others or because of himself. what he knows is that he has to find that notebook immediately, or his life will be so fucked up once his biggest secret gets revealed to everyone.

     he still hasn't mentioned the thing about hoseok earlier. he gave the older a glare just because he felt so upset and the latter barging into the room all of a sudden while he was crying made him feel worse. he didn't like it when people see him cry. it makes him feel pathetic, like the people see him as weak. and the fact that his diary is missing didn't help. everything took its toll on him and he ended up being rude, which wasn't intentional. he doesn't want to call it petty, since the diary holds so much importance to him, but he guesses that he was overworking himself and that he was overthinking that he's overreacting to everything that is currently happening. he was lucky that hoseok was understanding enough that when jimin said he should go ahead, he just obliged. he was thankful that his hyung didn't have to make things complicated for him.

    jungkook just took out the notebook he has been using as his new diary and flipped it to a blank page. he took out a pen from his bag and started to write a new entry for today.

01-16-14

diary,
    still one of the worst days. haven't found the original, and shit kept happening to me. i cried in front of jimin-hyung again and i felt so pathetic doing so. hoseok-hyung saw me and i wasn't in the right mood to get along with his cheeriness, so yeah, fuck it. i acted rude, i was an asshole and it annoys the heck out of me, it drives me up the wall because i kept on screwing up and stupid things, just like what i've said before, keeps on happening to me.

curse this life. night.

     he was about to write his initials and finish the entry when he remembered one particular scenario that he wouldn't ever forget. how the boy's expression changed into something he didn't like to see would always remain in his mind. and so, he writes again.

p.s. frowns would always be something that i would never ever like to see again. i freaking hate it.

                                      -jjk

      he closed the notebook and placed it under his pillow again. the scene keeps replaying in his mind, and as he tries to get some sleep tonight, one thought occurs in his mind.

backhugs were never the best things in his life.

※※※

"hey jungkook," hoseok approached his nearing figure, a cheeky grin appearing on his face. "what's up? you seem better today."

jungkook timidly smiled at the guy and replied, "yeah. sorry for yesterday, hyung. that was rude of me."

"oh," his senior's grin widened, as he playfully slapped and rubbed the younger's back repeatedly. "it's nothing. we all understand. something's probably bothering you, am i right, jungkookie?"