When I See You Again

I. Crystal Visions

Stevie's Journal:

Alright. Everything is set up. I leave to go on tour in exactly one week. Gosh, I am really excited though I am having some misconceptions... Lindsey.

Lindsey and I have yet to talk to each other and he is gonna probably freak out that I am leaving again. He wanted to start another Mac album, but he has to understand I have to do my own things, too.

We just finished the 'Say You Will' tour about two years ago and I need some time to myself. I have not toured solo since 2001- that's a lie, I did do that short 'Two Voices' tour with Don Henley last year. Lindsey loved that... not! Anyway, this is technically my break and that is because I am waiting to see my daughter.

My Lucy is an absolute doll, she is the splitting image of myself though she has dark hair- which is normal in a Nicks. My hair is brown but it goes blonde. Genetics. That is the story I am sticking with and people buy it- because that does happen.

Sweet little Lucy. I get so happy when I think of that little angel. Well, she isn't so little but she is still perfect. I have high hopes that maybe, if possible Lucy and Lindsey... DO NOT meet. I am a horrible human being. The only people who know that Lucy is my daughter, is Karen, Lori and Sharon and that is because Karen is my assistant, I can't seem to keep anything from her. Sharon and Lori are practically my sisters well one is my sister in law, so it is impossible for me to keep it from them. Other than those girls, absolutely no one else knows. Not even Lindsey knows about his child.

After Lindsey and I divorced in 87' I found out I was pregnant with her. I never told him since none of us were speaking. I have kept her a secret for the last couple decades and she has never asked about her father- which relieved me in many ways. If anything she is a relative or an adopted child- which is awful for people to think but I just couldn't bring myself to tell him.

If Lindsey would have known about this child, he and I probably would have never split and we would probably be together now- killing each other. He took leave of the band right before we started the 'Tango In The Night' tour and because of that we parted... Well, it wasn't just 'cause of that- other aspects were involved such as our normal bickering, plus marital issues and God knows what else. We still fight- but mostly in the studio. We stand to have a civil dinner and we occasionally 'get together'.

Aside from that, there is a party in my honour for me going on another tour. I- of course invited Lindsey and there is no chance in hell I'd tell my daughter, that she couldn't come or vise versa. Both people are intrical aspects in my life. Hell, one of them helped create the other. But... I have a feeling about this and it isn't pretty.

Lucy carries my last name and she is more than proud to and that makes me so happy. Lucy has met her father... briefly but he is more like her uncle... I guess. That sounds wrong all together- plus they aren't even that close.

I say they haven't met, simply because they've never really spoken to each other. Unless, there was a time they did and I just don't know. But, I however find that utterly impossible. Lucy knows Lindsey by sight but not personally as far as I am concerned. I wish to keep it that way.

Lindsey is still single- hot and available but, for us the only thing that works is; work, occasional love making- if that is even what it is, and our at home lives.

After Lindsey and I split there were many girlfriends as I recall and many almost wives- but at the rate Lindsey went with breaking hearts, he never settled down and during The Dance when the band reconvened- he and I almost did, but didn't.