Fate [ HRVY ]

chapter 27

Elliana's  pov

I woke up the next day with a scratchy throat and burning eyes. The effects of my drinking weren't helping much either.I got into the shower faster than lightening in order not to talk myself out of it.This was a much needed shower considering my sweaty odor.It was just about my smell though.Knowing that I was being used was painful and left me feeling dirty.

I had only ever been used once, and even then it didn't feel half as bad as it does now.That was when a girl befriended me just to steal my gymnastics floor routine for an important competition back home. I was devastated once I knew what her plan was all along. I even spent the rest of the weekend in my room and ignored everyone who tried to talk to me.Looking back at it now I see how stupid I was to react that way but it hurt knowing that someone could steal your work and make all your efforts go to waste.

Now,the pain as feeling wasn't even comparable to what I had felt back then.I,now,feel like I'm nothing like I never even mattered.Maybe it was getting hurt by someone who you cared about and whom you thought cared about you.Whatever the reason I felt terrible.The pain was weighing me down.

After attempting to let the hot water wash away  what  I was feeling, failing miserably,I shut off the water, brush my teeth, and get dressed. I walk downstairs to the kitchen and find my mom cooking breakfast.I grab two aspirin capsules and down them with water after I greet at my mother and take a seat on the island stool.

"You alright?You look a little out of it." asked my mom, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

"yeah fine.Just a bit tired."I say just as she places a plate of pancakes that I would usually devour as soon as I would lay eyes on it, but feeling nauseous at this hour.

I push the plate aside and get up ready to go to my room, back to the comfort of my covers.I'm stopped when my mother's hand pulls me back to where I was sat.

With worried eyes she said:"I know that I work a lot these days and that I'm always away but I'm still your mom. I'll always be here whenever you need to talk or whenever something this bothering you. You can talk to me.Always."

Either at her worried tone or the way she talked to me ,like she actually cared about me,I bursted into tears.In the comfort of her arms wrapped around me I cried like a little child till there were no more tears left in my body. 

After I had calmed down a little my mother led me into our living room where we sat on the couch facing the TV.

"How about we watch some films(movies)today?Black Panther came out a couple days ago. I know how excited you were to watch it."she smiled in an attempt to cheer me up.

At this I nodded, not trusting myself with words for I knew that I would start crying again.

The cast was rolling on the screen when my mom paused the movie and turned to look at me serious and worrisome feeling her eyes that had been hurt way too many times.

"You know you'll probably laugh at this later on in life.I remember when I first got heartbroken by a boy I felt terrible. It felt like the end of the world back then But believe me when I tell you life goes and you'll heal soon I promise.It won't feel as bad forever." 

Having not answered or reacted to what she said,staring a head into empty space with an expressionless face,She added:"That boy, was it serious? what you two had."

"I-I believed so until last night" I replied chocking back the years threatening to fall again.

"it's just teenage love ,honey. You still have a lot of time ahead. You'll in and out of love a couple more times before you finally find the one. Don't think of this as the end of the world.Think of it this was you're one boy closer to finding the one(WOWP)"

Silence.

I did not know how to respond to that. Was she right?Is this ,in reality, only a phase that I would outgrow?

Taking my silence as a sign that I didn't want to talk anymore she pressed play.

The day went by quick.I didn't notice that it was already noon by now. My mom and I had spent the day watching movies that I wasn't sure I still remembered how to move.

Although at some scenes my mind would drift back to the emptiness I was feeling without it it still managed to take my mind off of what's going on.

After the fourth movie-or was it the fifth?-ended my mom had turned off the tv and turned to face me.She squeezed my arm reassuringly and looked at me with an emotion swirling, in her hazelnut eyes, unknown to me. She was giving me that look. When you wanted to ask something but were to worried to utter the words.

Conflict was evident in her eyes and me being the idiot that I am was staring at her in confusion. I guess she took my confusion as an okay sign to proceed with asking the question.

"Are you in love with him?"She asked searching my eyes for an answer.

Am I in love with him? I hadn't really thought about this before. Is what I'm feeling for him considered love. 

"You'll know when you fall in love. It'll feeling like your floating on cloud 9 whenever you look into that person's eyes.Like you two are the only two people on the planet, there to comfort each and other and make them feel safe, loved,and cared for."I knew mom was trying to decrease my confusion but she had that distinct look in her eyes like she had escaped into an old memory, reminiscing there past.I knew, just then, that she was thinking of dad.

During my childhood years I would always ask my dad to tell me the story of how he and my mom had met and fell in love.It was my favorite bedtime story.

Without giving it a thought I wrapped my arms around her fragile frame and we held each other for comfort.

 That is until the doorbell rang at least.

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A/N short chapter but I wanted to upload a new one today so here you go.

Thank for reading.