A Guard's life

Christmas and Pizza

A/N:

So! Second chapter for the CHRISTMAS DAY!
Not much to say other than... ENJOY!

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"Why."
This wasn't even a question, it was an emotion. Mike sat on a table of the dining area, with a Christmas hat and a glass of something he wished to be alcoholic in nature. Next to him were about ten doggos, eating pizza with kibble and barking excitedly.
Dave and Old Sport were singing since six o'clock all Christmas songs they knew. It started with "Jingle Bells", continued with "We wish you a merry Christmas" and were now on "Last Christmas", driving Mike slowly insane, but he kept quiet since Jeremy was singing along.
Phone was merciful and sat down next to him, handing him some earplugs. "You aren't really one for the holiday spirits, are you?"
"Fucking guess."
"But... everyone loves Christmas! Even the robots like it!"
A staring contest ensued, which PG won, since he didn't even needed to blink. "I just never got the fuzz about it. What is so great about it? Nice food and present you could have whenever you wanted, but for some reason people think they can ONLY give each other present on some arbitrarily day, essentially FORCING each other into giving presents."
"Forcing? Were you forced into buying presents?"
"Yes."
"By whom? Tell me, because I'd love to get to know the person that can force you to do ANYTHING."
"Fuck you, Phone-face."
"Okay, do you want some alcohol? I have some in the office..."
"No. I'm not allowed to drink, since it could react with my medicine."
"Well, I'm going to get some."
Phone Guy left for a short while, leaving Mike to continue to stare at his co-workers. Jeremy was decorating the tree, handing ornaments he wanted to have on top of the tree over to the puppet, who floated up and placed in the desired location. Dave and Old Sport were dancing on the table, now singing about a meme machine, for some reason, cheerful as ever.
The scene was so peaceful, he could almost forget that he was surrounded by murderers.
Phone Guy came back, a few bottles and small glasses in his hands and sat back down next to Mike, pouring himself some.
Attracted by their curiosity, the two colorful Guards moved towards them, Old Sport jumped onto the table and posed like one of the French girls. "PHONEY, MY HOENEY, did you noticed that Jeremy has freed the most dangerous animatronic of the pizzeria and is currently carrying it around in his backpack?"
"Oh gee, employee, thanks for telling me! We have to get rid of it, before it KILLS KIDS, or MOLESTS ROBOTS!"
Old Sport rolled off, pouting. "Okay, fine, I get it. Can I have a drink?"
"Sure, why not." With that Phone Guy poured Dave and Old Sport a generous fill and leaned back, almost relaxed. "If we are forced to be chained to a hellish company forever, we can at least spend our days here a bit nicer. I sure hope you two brought some presents!"
"Of course! As if I'd pass an opportunity to give you something back!"
"If it's something dangerous, I'll personally make it my lifegoal to end you."
Dave and Old Sport exchanged a look and began to snicker. "As if we would EVER do that!"
Mike interrupted. "By the way, WHERE the FUCK is my cap?! I hate this shitty Christmas hat."
"Na-ah, Mikey~ it's our day, our rules! Dress code!"
"We got you a presents! The least you can do is letting us have a bit fun!"
Phone Guy only opened his receiver to drink his shot. "Don't mind it, Mike, we're all wearing it after all."
Growling the moody man stood up and went over to Jeremy and his Marionette. Whenever the Marionette's body vanished into the bag, a... ghost appeared? Well, rather a shadow than a ghost, it's body was almost black, with white marks here and there. Their eyes met and Mike realized something disgusting.
What the Marionette was wearing wasn't a mask.
That was his FACE.
And it GRINNED.
"Mike, can you hold that for a second?" Jeremy handed him an armful of colorful ornaments. "Really, I love that I can FINALLY decorate a tree! This is so BEAUTIFUL!"
His ghostly companion nodded in agreement.
"Great, it looks snazzy. Could you take out the fucking death marionette? I'd rather have it somewhere I can SEE it."
"SEE! MARION, THEY WANT TO SEE YOU!"
Now it were the Puppet and the Guard, who were exchanging glances.
Yes, I'm sure that it's that.
"Right, Jeremy, we'd LOVE to have this terrifying, giant monster with us at our table!"
"REALLY?! YOU'RE SO NICE! I KNEW YOU COULD GET OVER THE PAST! You guys are THE BEST!"
They once more looked at each other. Whispering, which was actually redundant, since the telepathy could be directed, the Puppet nudged Mike.
Should we tell him...?
"No."
Slowly the thing crawled out of the soft prison and accompanied them to the table, where Old Sport was waving franticly. "PUPPET! SIT NEXT TO ME! HERE'S A CHAIR FOR YOU! YOU CAN SIT HERE!"
Before Dave or the machine could argue, Jeremy rushed over. "Heck yeah! You're too kind!"
Awkward silence ensued, as the Puppet crammed himself onto the small chair.
A few seconds passed until Old Sport decided to break the ice, a bad decision soon regretted by everyone in the room except for him.
"You know what I always have to think about when I see presents?!"
"What?"
"Dead bodies!"
Everyone was puzzled at those words.
"Yeah, Phoney told me last year about how still and lifeless unopened presents appear! I think he wanted to guilt-trip me or something, since he said there would be presents lying under the tree, which would never be opened, since the children died in this restaurant! But I couldn't help myself but think... What kind of retarded parents buy presents for their dead kids?! I mean, seriously? Love ya Phoney, but you are pretty slow."
The Puppet reached over and covered his lips.
Shut up. I do not wish to massacre you on this day of peace.
"Why not? Is the day of peace any different to you than any other day? I mean, don't get me wrong, I like to stay alive, but it's just very odd to me... Revenge should be an everyday act!"
Orange Guy, I really agree with you. It is time to end you.
"Could you fucking shorten your sentences a little? You aren't impressing ANYONE." Mike yawned. "Seriously, we all know it's just an act by now, so please fucking spare us. Every second I'm NOT spending with your stupid talk is a second I DON'T feel like killing myself."
Insulted the being turned towards the asshole.
You will be next.
"Oh, I'm SCARED! MOMMY, HELP ME!"
Jeremy interrupted. "While we're at dead children, why aren't the animatronics here?"
They all looked at him.
Phone Guy poured himself another shot. "Yeah, he's right! Get 'em over here!"
As Old Sport shortly rushed over, Phone Guy curiously sat up. "How did your charity work out, you two?"
"It was GREAT!"
Absolutely horrible.
"The kids were so excited, they couldn't stop cheering."
Screaming is the better word for it.
"And they loved the gifts so much, they hugged them for hours!"
They hoped that they could use the gifts as shield.
"All in all I'd love to it again!"
It wasn't all that bad. Three of them really appeared to be happy, thankfully, and as soon as they started playing with me, the others stopped crying so loud. In my opinion are three happy kids still worth it.
Five minutes later, the whole group was sitting around, chattering and having a great time. Dave and Old Sport had left them though, under the excuse of checking up on the presents.
"Good, good, phase one of Orange Guy's "happy-sappy-three-step-plan" went swimmingly!"
Dave couldn't say anything against that name. "What was the first step?"
"Luring everyone into a false sense of security! Now we're going into step two: Trap and attack! Take this!" With that he covered him in leaves. "MISTLETOES! We HAVE to hang them up EVERYWHERE!"
"Why?" Confused Dave eyed them.
"Because..." Shortly he paused. "Dave, don't you know what Mistletoes mean?"
With a certain naiveté Dave smelled on them. "They aren't poisonous, are they? I mean, you would have told me... wouldn't you..?"
Puzzled Old Sport raised a brow, there was real worry in the voice of his friend. "What are you thinking of me? No, it isn't, this is actually about a very old tradition, that goes... wait, I'll show you."
Suddenly smirking mischievously Old Sport held up one of them and signed him to come closer. "First you hang it somewhere and wait until two people step under it."
Dave slightly bend down to step under the plant, expectantly watching Old Sport.
"And then they have to..." He grabbed Dave and smooched him. "Kiss each other!"
The poor man was now burning red, his eyes glowed like spotlights. "T-that's a... a tradition?!"
But the Orange Guard had already left under laughter, looking for a ladder to reach the ceiling with. It took Dave actually seven minutes to calm down and follow him with the mistletoes.
After ten productive minutes, they were finished with their work, except of course in the main hall, where the Guards could have noticed what exactly they were doing.
Jeremy was too curious though, so he wandered over and stepped next to Orange Guy. "What are you doing?" He noticed the leaves and laughed. "What a nice idea! But now I'm standing under it with you right?"
"You're goddam right!" Giggling he leaned down the ladder, but after he gave the boy a peck on the nose, he was flung into the next wall, by an outraged Puppet, who stood protectively in front of the shocked kid. Its claws were exposed, ready to rip open any enemy.
WHAT WERE YOU PLANNING ON DOING TO JEREMY?!
"Jesus, chill... ow, my back..." Defeated Old Sport stayed on the ground. "It's a mistletoe, Puppet! That's what people do! C'mon, it was just a little touch!"
Jeremy worryingly made a few steps towards the Guard. "A-are you alright...? Sorry...!"
"Nah, I'm fine! I have at least three ribs still intact!"
The young man somewhat sighed at his friend, before tugging him down and giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Merry Christmas, you paranoid. Didn't I tell you never to attack anyone? You could always harm someone who doesn't deserve it!"
Sorry... I made bad memories.
"Say sorry to Old Sport, then it's fine!"
Obviously uncomfortable, the being floated towards his old enemy.
Sorry for attacking you for the wrong reason.
Smugly grinning the Orange Guard rose from the ground. "Jeremy is a really good influence. I'm proud of him."
One day I will sit on the end of your bed, your beating heart in my claws.
"Awww, I love you too!"
And with that he jumped up, running towards the main area.
Mike had noticed what was going on and was ready to fight. "I WON'T LEAVE THIS AREA. NO, FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU ALL. FUCK YOUR MISTLETOES!"
The animatronics were excited and walked around, looking at the plant and discussing if it was a good addition.
Phone Guy was taking his bottle again, but ultimately decided against it. "Don't worry, it's not like they move around or some stuff. If you are careful where you go, you should be fine."
Chica sneaked up and grabbed Mike. "NOT IF I KIDNAP HIM!"
"FUCKING FUCK, LET ME THE FUCK GO, OR I'LL FUCK YOU UP, YOU FUCK, I DON'T WANT TO KISS A FUCKING MOULDY ASS ROBOT THAT WAS FILLED WITH A CORPSE! IF YOU PULL ME UNDER A FUCKING MISTLETOE, I'LL LET YOU KISS MY FUCKING FIST!"
"Honey, if your fist lands on my face, your fist is gonna lose..."
"Chica, please let him down, he had a bad day."
Insulted she turned away. "Whatever! I also have better things to do, than trying to cheer up a piece of sh*t!" The automatic censor activated itself.
The distracted Mike didn't noticed Old Sport running towards him until it was too late and the snowball hit the back of his head. "WHAT THE FUCK?! WHO THE FUCK WAS THAT!?"
Old Sport was back at the employees-only door, laughing his ass of. The laughter was quickly silenced as Mike began to chase him. "COME BACK HERE SO I CAN BREAK YOUR NECK!"
Quickly he picked up his baseball bat, in case his fist weren't sufficient. While opening the backdoor he crouched, effectively dodging the barrage of ice aimed where his body was a second before.
Old Sport was panting heavily, but glowing with joy. "TRY TO GET ME, MIKEY~!"
The man got ready to charge at him, yet suddenly noticed the ghost children who had sneaked up behind his foe, each with an impressive amount of snow in their hand.
Grinning he lowered his bat. "I don't even have to get you."
"What? Why?"
"Because you're already surrounded. GET HIM!"
Squealing Old Sport was dragged down and bombarded with snow. It was stuffed into his mouth, his hair and his clothes, making him scream out for his friend. "DAVE! MIKE'S VIRGINAL POWERS HAVE REACHED THE NEXT LEVEL! HE'S NOW A PSYCHIC! SAVE ME!"
As soon as possible he began to run away, unknowingly being chased by five snickering kids.
Mike laughed maniacally at this newfound power. "YOU WILL DIE OUT HERE! ANGERING ME WAS YOUR LAST MISTAKE! I WILL-"
And with that he was tackled to the ground by a grinning Dave and rubbed face first into the cold snow. "CALL BACK YOUR POWERS, FIEND, AND FIGHT US LIKE A MAN!"
The underdog managed to free his left arm and hit his enemy right between the ribs, making him fall back. In a flash Mike kicked more snow into Dave's face, blinding him long enough to pounce onto him, ready to suffocate him with the ice.
Luckily for Dave though, Old Sport had managed to escape his followers for long enough to throw another snowball, right at Mike's face.
"Oh, I WANNA JOIN TOO!" Jeremy jumped in, throwing only half-formed chunks of ice around at everybody. Dave and Mike got ready for a counter, but suddenly the Marionette appeared behind Jeremy, his neck crooked and his expression telling a tale of pain for anyone who dared to hurt his partner.
Once Old Sport managed run past the smaller Guard and the ghosts hit him by accident, there was no holding back as the Marionette began chasing them around. Now free from the haunting of his past victim, the Orange Guard helped Dave up and began with the next snowball aimed at Mike, who had built himself a snow wall for protection.
Jeremy was giggling as he threw himself right into it. "NO HIDING!" Playful he shoveled a handful of ice into his friend's jacket.
Said man wasn't having any of it and indiscriminately shoved him down into the cold, just as with others.
"HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO MY UNOFFICIALLY ADOPTED SON! YOU MONSTER!" With a battle cry the Orange Guard attacked and rolled around with his co-worker.
All of a sudden Dave cried out. "YOUR ADOPTED SON WITH WHOM?! HAVE YOU BEEN UNFAITHFUL?! I WILL END THIS SIGN OF YOUR BETRAYAL!"
Both looked up to see that Dave had Jeremy in a headlock, one hand free and filled with a pile of snow, ready to be mushed all over him.
"NO! DON'T DO IT DAVE! IT DOESN'T HAVE TO END THIS WAY! WE CAN BE A FAMILY!"
"WHY SHOULD I BELIEVE YOU, OLD SPORT?! AFTER THIS CRUEL ACT I CAN'T SAY I KNOW YOU ANYMORE!""
Jeremy had listened with a smirk and now jerked Dave's arm towards his face, using the surprise to duck away, making the Purple Guy hit himself instead. Victorious the boy howled.
"I AM THE SNOW KING!"
Old Sport looked at Dave, who returned the amused expression. They chimed in. "THE SNOW KING, THE SNOW KING!"
Mike was almost ready to interrupt, but felt too tired and wet for that.
The colorful duo picked up Jeremy and carried him back inside, repeating his hymn over and over. Old Sport called out for Foxy.
"Hey, Foxy, the Snow King has arrived! Tell his tale for a hundred years to come!"
Right back on board, Foxy bowed. "Your majesty! You have the power! Bless us with the final arrival of Christmas!"
All the other machines began to surround him as well, cheering and clapping.
"TIME FOR PRESENTS!" Jeremy screamed out, excitement making his voice crack.
Dave jumped up. "I have a surprise for that!" Quickly he vanished into the backroom, just to return basically immediately. "PHONEY! DID YOU FREE THE MIDGET I KIDNAPPED?"
"You mean the one dressed in all green?"
"He was supposed to be an elf!"
"I threw him in the dumpster, we can't really afford more legal-suits."
"Shit, I worked for days until I found one! You ruined my Christmas!"
"Calm the fffffffff--- heck down." Phoney stretched and picked up the almost impressive amount of presents from under the tree. "So, they are sorted out after name, who wants to go first?"
Old Sport jumped forward. "I WANNA, I WANNA!" In a flash he stormed at his boss, making him drop it all and seek for shelter from his wrath.
Like the wild animal that the zombie was, he teared apart the wrapping paper, almost ripping apart what was inside. There was a small, puppy-sized plush of a doggo in there! Handmade too! How c00t!
Embarrassed, Jeremy giggled. "I made it for you! Even if I'm not that good at doing this, I hope you still like it..."
"I FUCKING LOVE IT! I COULD EAT IT RIGHT HERE!" With that ringing endorsement, Old Sport threw it over the shoulder to open his next, smaller package. It contained... raisins.
"Fuck you, I don't fucking knew what else the fuck I should get you, so I-"
"YOU'RE THE BEST! I'M AMAZED!" While Mike tugged his hat deeper into his face to hide any kind of relief, Old Sport downed them all in one giant gulp, to move on to the last box. After vaporizing the package with his sheer determination, it revealed a hand crank, great in quality and condition. Phone Guy slightly coughed.
"Wouldn't want to lose you just like that, now would we? It should give you more safety in your job."
"Oh gee, thanks Mr. Phone Man, it makes me almost regret being a bad person! Kidding, I like it! The present, I mean."
For a minute he stared at his gifts, smiling, then looked up, still with the same expression. "Dave? Where's your gift?"
Dave sat up straight and grinned. "Well, you remember that Minireena wanted to stay home today, right?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you know why?"
"Dave, if you don't get to my present right now, I'll cut off your balls-"
"She's getting your stuff ready! You're gonna move in with me, sweetheart!"
"This is-" The Orange Guy stopped and rolled his eyes. "You could have asked me before!"
"Why should I? It's not like you would say no... whenever I watched you alone in your house, you were so depressed!"
"You..." Slowly he walked closer until he towered over his sitting friend, who kept smiling. "... bastard." He flicked him against the nose. "This is basically another gift you made for yourself, right?"
"I'd call it... mutual beneficial!"
Pouting the Orange Guy walked away and sat down next to Phone Guy, who actually patted him on the back. "At least you got presents."
"You got some too! Stop lying, I got you one MYSELF!"
Genuinely shocked, the Head-Guard was investigated the pile. There wasn't just one, there were FOUR presents lying there with his name! Or rather labeled Mr. Phone Guy, Phoney, Phone-replacement-for-a-dad-that-I-never-had and Simon.
Instinctively he reached for the one with the name on it. It was wrapped in basically nothing but a thin paper. There was a shining Taser inside.
Mike had now turned away fully, making the Phone-head guess that it was because of intense reddening of his face. "You... should have something to protect yourself with. Don't want to become the next psychopath of the building, just because I feel the need to make sure you aren't dying."
"This... this means a lot to me! Actually, I think no one EVER told me I should keep myself safe..."
"Yeah, yeah, mushy feels and shit, I'll be back when you fucking calmed down."
This wasn't an empty threat, Mike had something different to do anyway. Once he managed to shortly hide away in the office, he called for his ghost-kids. They appeared, smiling and chattering.
"You guys can leave, I just wanted to talk to Suzy."
"The f... frick do you want?!"
"Why are you censoring yourself?"
"Because it's Christmas! If I swear, I'll get nothing but coal."
"Well, didn't your mom tell you that Santa isn't real?" She stared him down, her expression unreadable due to her mask, but the older one assumed she was somewhat terrified. "But that doesn't matter anyway, since I made you a present myself."
"Oh, great, what is it? A broken pen? A piece of chewed gum?"
"What... what are you thinking of me?! Fuck you!"
"WE HATE EACH OTHER! YOU WOULD NEVER GIVE ME SOMETHING!"
"I... I don't hate you." Irritated Mike shook his head. "What the fuck gave you that idea? You're annoying, but so is the rest of this planet."
The little Foxy-masked girl hugged herself. "I don't believe you."
"Look at what I made for you and decide for yourself."
She accepted the thing wrapped in fabric and began to carefully examine it. Finding nothing suspicious she unwrapped it.
A figurine out of basswood fell out. It was a Toy Foxy, clumsily carved out of the wood, drawn on with paint. No words followed upon Suzy picking up the figure.
"Just t-to your fucking information, I spend THE LAST WEEKS on that shit! You better-"
Crying the kid hugged him around the waist. "THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! It's... it's beautiful! You... really did this... for me?!"
"Of course. I wanted to help you."
Golden glow emitted out of her tiny body, as she took of her mask, smiling brightly at him. "We're... repaired. Finally."
Gary, who had watched from the door stepped in, shyly nodding at Suzy. "Congratulation! You're free! I told you Mike would find a way..."
The girl hugged her friend and twirled him around, just to run out, her present still in her hands.
The bear and the Guard stayed back, silently.
"What do you need to go free?"
"I... I'm not sure..." The boy scratched his arms, appearing lonelier and lonelier the longer Mike looked at him. "You should head back for now, your friends will start to worry! I will think about it, okay?"
There was no reason to argue with the kid, so Mike only returned to his group, snorting as he saw PG wearing a fake moustache and a shaded monocle.
"What the fuck."
"Old Sport's gift. For old time sakes."
"I don't even want to know."
Now PG was carefully opening the smallest package, which contained a CD, with some sort of classical music. Jeremy shrugged slightly helpless. "I didn't know what you'd like, sir. I hope this brings some joy to your life..."
"Any kind of gift (excluding dead bodies, lawsuits, semen of any kind and deadly animatronics trying to kill me in my sleep) is a great gift. Thank you a lot!"
Slightly worried Phoney finally grabbed the presents Dave had placed under there and weighed it in his hands, as if he could weigh danger. After noticing that basically everyone was staring at him, he unwrapped it.
An oddly shaped screwdriver fell out of it, caught in the last minute by the Purple Guy himself. With an almost calm smile he handed it over again. "You know, this isn't any ol' screwdriver! No, that would be mean, wouldn't it? No, this fits in only one place... probably. Can you guess?"
"Your a--- I mean, the robots?"
"Well, define "robot", am I right?" Laughing at his own joke, the man proceed. "Nah, it is for your head!"
"WHAT?"
"Yes! In case you want to take a look. Or get rid of some... barriers they inserted. They say it's to keep you safe, but honestly, what's the worst that could happen?"
Phone Guy stared at the tool, terrified.
Dave shoved him over, greedily grabbing the stack, only afterwards checking which one were his. Letting the others drop carelessly, he instantly tore apart the one from Old Sport.
The item inside was treated with the utmost contrast. Lovingly Dave softly tugged it out of the shreds.
It was a shining knife, fairly big, but still able to be condensed, as well as at least appearing to be sturdy. The color scheme was horrible, since purple with orange highlights were NOT a good combo, but the Purple Guy was squealing like a ten year old.
"IT'S THE BEST! I WILL KEEP IT FOREVER! AND IF I END UP IN A FILTHY SAFEROOM, MY BODY TRAPPED IN HORRIBLE PAIN DUE TO BEING TRAPPED IN A FUCKING BUNNY SUIT, I'LL STILL HAVE IT WITH ME!"
"That was... oddly specific."
"Well, Phoney tried that once, I think..."
Mike gave his friend a questioning look. But since they were now officially partners, as well as the man having downed quite an amount of alcohol already, he only shrugged. "Can you blame me?"
"No, I just wanted to say that I admire your creativity."
"Naturally! We Phone-Men are talented at getting rid of unwanted things!"
"OH, OH, A NEW ACCESSORY FOR MY HAIR! NEAT!" Purple Guy dangled a black hair tie, with a small, probably plastic black rose on it.
The rude Guard made a dismissive noise. "I found it laying on the ground."
"But you cleaned it!"
"I'm not a monster."
"You're lovely! NEXT!" In a split second, the next gift was in his hands. It was an old looking movie, with the depiction of a half-hidden monster on it. The expression of the receiver of this gift was somewhat... tense. "Uh... there aren't any loud noises in that, are there?"
"Oh, sorry, I don't know! I kinda just thought you might like these kinds of things, I'm a little too scared to watch them myself..." The sad boy basically deflated on the spot, making Old Sport shooting a dirty look at his friend.
"No, no, no, it's... nice! Thanks, I'll watch it as soon as possible! Whatever, let's go on to next now!" As quickly as possible the next paper was devoured on the spot, leaving nothing but a book. It was called: "10 ways to tell if the world were better off without you" It was apparently written by "le téléphone homme" and Old Sport guessed that it was some kind of synonym, but couldn't tell for what.
"Eh... trash." It was devoured as well. Now full and satisfied, he curled up next to Old Sport, not interested anymore in anything else.
Jeremy shyly nudged Mike. "Do you mind if I...?"
"Nah, I'd rather never open whatever abomination you guys laid under the tree for me, so go ahead."
Smiling kindly, Jeremy began to open them one by one. "Don't tell me who gifted it, I want to guess!"
The puppet wrapped himself around him, protectively, as the young Guard took a look at what he got.
It were...
A folder, filled with photos! There were spaces left empty, for his own chosen memories!
A little Freddie-plushie! How adorable!
A lucky charm! Wrapped around some blue papers! Always lovely to have!
And a music box! With a beautiful melody!
Amazed Jeremy marveled at these beautiful things. "I really can't tell who got me what, they are all so awesome! Okay, okay, I'll try... the music box was either Mr. Phone Guy or Mike, but I guess it's Mike, since you still don't trust my new friend."
"Yep."
"Good... the Plushie is from Mr. Phone Guy, it's his franchise after all!"
"No, I got you the album... even though I have to remind you to never make pictures of anything that could incriminate us, alright?"
"Of course, sir! Well, I failed at that, but at least only two more to go... uh... the Freddy-plush is from Old Sport and the lucky charm is from Dave!"
The colorful Guards applauded. "Spot on!"
Mike only frowned. Since when were they calling the Purple Guy Dave?
It probably didn't matter.
Curiously the boy unwrapped the papers as well, studying what was on there. His question mark turned into three exclamation marks as he read the top. "These are blueprints for an animatronic! Jeremy the Jay?! Is this... is this supposed to be me?!"
Dave laughed. "YES! So you will stay with us forever, I'm making an animatronic out of you!"
Petrified Mike stopped breathing and simply watched as the puppet rose up and moved towards the psycho, its face contorted and somewhat twitching. However, the (not really) human stopped him with one simple sentence.
"You know you want it too."
The machine stopped revealing its claws, whispering something Mike couldn't quite catch.
"So you'd rather see him dead...?"
"Dead?!" Jeremy perked up, slightly frightened by the way his two friends interacted.
"Deadly disappointed! So sad that you won't even stand up again! Your friend here said that gifting you an animatronic would be in... poor taste. But I think he's just being a bitch." Grinning brightly, the Purple Guy nodded to himself. "And I didn't finish it yet anyway, so we can decide when it's time."
"Why would I say no to an animatronic that is like me?"
"I would argue the same! Marionette has a problem with the bad parts of being an animatronic, for example the yiffs and the bites, but you would never do that, so Jeremy the Jay would be save."
"Totally right! Don't be the scared Marion, Dave knows what he is doing! He gave all of you a voice after all!"
Jeremy may wanted to give everyone a hug, but the puppet was somewhat in the way. Definitely intended.
Everyone was now waiting for Mike to get his stuff.
Mike wasn't ready to go through hell though. "Someone else can have it."
They protested, even the animatronics, who didn't pay any attention were distraught. As now the ghost joined in as well, Mike caved in.
"FUCKING FINE, YOU FUCKWITS. If it's a massive fucking disappointed like everything else in my life, you can sort it out by yourself." Aggressive he picked up the last boxes. "Okay. Do I start with the fine stuff and THEN ruin my day? Sounds like a plan. Best things first."
The man picked up two of them, the one from Jeremy and the one of Simon.
The first contained a scented candle, which was supposed to calm people down, at least that was what Jeremy explained happily.
The second one had a big, heavy flashlight in it. Apparently even with extra metal protection.
"It MAY or may not is able to beat a grown man into a pulp, BUT... it's JUST a flashlight, so no one can really bother you because of that."
In silent appreciation Mike nodded, but this positive feeling was crushed by the excitement he could see with Dave and Old Sport as they waited for him to open the last gifts.
Maybe it would be better if he just closed his eyes and got it over with.
But he wasn't a pussy.
Purple Guy's present was cocaine. Quite a lot of it actually.
"You always look so down, so I thought you'd might like a little something against that."
"I'm tripping out without help, thank you very much."
"Nagging, nagging, nagging, all day, all night! Just fucking sell it and get rich for all I care!"
Mike blinked utterly dumbfounded. "Yeah... why didn't I do that yet?!"
"Because selling this would mean to fuel someone's harmful addiction! And Mike is far too softhearted to do such a horrible thing!"
Of course Jeremy had to ruin this nice solution to all of Mike's problems.
"Yeah... right..." Sighing he checked out the last thing.
For a minute he processed what was now in his possession.
No one said a word.
Old Sport started to grin. "C'mon, it would look cute!"
It was a weird servant-outfit. Maid outfit, if Mike remembered his experience with the internet right.
"Alright, that was the last straw." The man lunged at his co-worker, strangling him with the dress.
The others didn't really feel the need to intervene, after all Old Sport knew the risks. Five minutes later, it calmed down, the ripped fabric was left on the not-corpse.
"I hate the holidays."
"It wasn't all bad, right? Focus more on the positive." Despite the scorn that should be present in those words, they came out rather affectionate.
"Focus more on fucking yourself."
They rolled their eyes at each other, smiling a little.
The darkness was sticking onto the windows and slowly the Marionette began to become uncomfortable.
Shouldn't we... leave?
"But why, dear Marion?! We're having a great time!"
Well, the children might be a little more... irritable, now that it's Christmas.
"One more reason to stay! The kids will be happy to finally spend their holidays with someone else for a change!"
Slowly the Marionette floated back and forth, thinking, but staying quiet. Seeing as he wasn't paying attention to them, they didn't even ask him if he wanted to join the board games they set up.
As Mike now lied in the background, snoring, the others decided it would be time for the B O A R D G A M E S! Magical as always.
So, they played four-people/animatronic games, until all of a sudden Freddy threw his cards away. "I HATE this game."
Chica rolled her eyes. "Just because you're losing all the time! B*tch."
"I always hated this hellish game. I hated to play it with my old relatives and I hate to play it with Guards."
Foxy nervously tried to keep his hook calm and kept looking back and forth. "G-guys...? Should we...? You know...?" He signed at the Guards around them.
Bonnie shrugged. "Nah, it's Christmas."
Freddy furrowed his brows as he noticed the Marionette. "Oh hey, BOSS. Long time no see."
Hello, Freddy.
"No mention of anything? I see you're out of your box! HOW ABOUT KILLING THEM?"
... It is Christmas.
"OH, CHRISTMAS YOU SAY?! IT'S BEEN CHRISTMAS TWENTY TIMES ALREADY. Why aren't you attacking?!"
...
"What? Did you LIE to us?"
I never did.
"AHA! Then... you wouldn't mind, right? Let's do it!"
Both groups were now looking at the fragile machine, waiting for the side it would take. Jeremy made a step forward, smiling. "How about we calm them?"
In a flash the thing wrapped itself around Jeremy's head, making him stumble around. "W-what are you doing?"
Go on, children.
Old Sport tried to spat on the ground like a tough guy, failed misery and gave up. "I have another good reason! Don't attack us, because WE!" The man sprinted over and shoved Mike of his bench. "HAVE A MIKE! He can take on five of you by HIMSELF! I'VE SEEN IT! And together with my help, we can RULE THE WORLD!"
Growling irritated, the Guard slowly rose. "I'd rather see you die. I'd even kill you myself right now."
"Employee... you do know that the old models are quite a lot sturdier?"
"Whatever, we are five against... I mean, we're four against four, it will be a CAKEWALK! I'M READY TO RUMBLE!"
Phone Guy sighed and sat down, next to Mike. "Go and have fun, employee. I'll have another drink."
Foxy stood up, glitching out. "I want to go home, even if it means killing. I want to go home, I want to go home, HOME, HoME WANT to GO HOME HOME HOME my h-home I WANT WANT WANT TO GOooOOOO!"
The monster began stepping forward, twitching, eying his potential targets. Once he saw Mike, he began clicking. "Y-YOU! DiDn'T I tell you ThAT I'M NO P-PIRATE?! WhyYY dIND'T yOu HELP ME?!"
Unbelieving Mike couldn't do anything as the fox began to charge towards him, the maw open wide and ready to swallow him whole, as the screech echoed through the halls.
Surprisingly that wasn't the loudest noise in the moment.
Phone Guy's fist bashing onto the table, together with his scream was so much louder.
"NO RUNNING IN THIS RESTAURANT!" Foxy almost tripped over himself, as he tried to stop. "DIDN'T YOU READ THE GOSH DARN RULES?!"
"N-no, sir..."
"WHY? You know I can throw you out for breaking the rules, right?"
"Please don't, sir, I h-have nowhere else to go!"
The Phone Guy sat back down, shaking his head. "I'm not cruel... but listen, we have a party here. A party you're explicitly invited to! But we can't keep you around, if you misbehave like this! I'm the manager, I have to make the decisions and I would LIKE to decide that you all can stay."
Sniffling the poor animatronic hugged itself, prompting the Head-Guard to stand up, hug him and pet his back. "There, there, it's alright. Hey, I have a little present for you!" With that he stood up and went towards the tree again, revealing that the gifts that were appearing as if they were only decoration had actually something inside. "That goes for your friends too! But with you Freddy... I think trying to kill your boss gets you on the naughty list..."
"WHAT? I- I mean, who cares! I don't need a stupid present!"
Foxy had already ripped his open and found a brand new hook and eyepatch in a shiny golden color inside.
"You don't have to keep it if you don't like it, we could order something else..."
"Thank you... captain..." Smiling weakly, the Foxy put on the new items. "Sorry for freaking out so much..."
Bonnie came closer and claimed his own present. "Oh, sweet, a new guitar! It looks cool, thank you mister!"
Chica grinned at her new cupcake. "I have a feeling that it isn't just a change of color... what is it?"
"A camera and you can easily use it to hold real cupcakes that you can give to the kids... or eat them yourself."
Freddy made some unpleasant notes. "SO YOU ALL JUST DON'T CARE?! SOME PRESENTS AND EVERYTHING IS FINE? THIS IS OUR CHANCE! WE CAN BE FREE NOW!"
"How should we fight against four of them at once? As well as I don't believe in this anymore. We will never leave. Just accept it."
NO! We- I will find a way!
They all turned towards the puppet that had watched closely the whole time, still wrapped around the young Guards face. Bonnie stepped closer until they were on eyelevel.
"I think you're a filthy liar. No matter who we killed, nothing happened. No freedom. And now you're sitting here, together with the people you ordered us to kill, all relaxed and friendly, despite them being the key to our freedom. Something smells fishy and it isn't our tuna pizza. Give us one good reason to attack."
Don't you SEE! It is your killer! YOUR KILLER IS SITTING RIGHT THERE, MUNCHING SOME COOKIES!
Bonnie turned to look at Dave and began to laugh frantically. "It is?! REALLY?! Are you sure this time?! You told us that quite a lot about the most different Guards! But that isn't even the funny part... do you know what the FUNNY part is?! I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER HIS FACE. I WAS KILLED BY A MAN, WHO'S FACE I DON'T EVEN RECOLLECT ANYMORE, IT'S BEEN SO LONG! You keep telling us that our murderer is the reason we're here, but every night I have to doubt it more and more. After I died and woke back up, I didn't see the same face I saw before closing them for the presumed last time. No. What I saw wasn't a monstrous human. It was your face. Your smug grin. Your shitty plan. It was YOU."
Slowly teeth extended out of the laughing mouth of the plastic mask.
This hardly matters. You will never get out of here if you continue with this mindset.
"Yes, puppet. We will never get out of here. And I will never know who's fault that is. But if I don't move on, I'll go just as insane as you and that isn't worth it."
I AM NOT INSANE.
"SURE about that? You floating, creepy bastard, who somehow can see everything while being stuck in a box! I shudder whenever you come close to me! You're rotting and rotting in another way than we do after all this time. Your body looks pristine, but I can see there's something terrible wrong with you! Look at your teeth! YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TEETH. You're older than all of us and you rotted over the point of humanity."
I was never human.
"LIAR! SICK, DISGUSTING LIAR! Whatever, I'm happy you finally fucked off! Stay away from me and my friends. Stay away from this place, so we can at least TRY to find some happiness!"
Angry the supernatural monster floated upwards, staying firmly connected to his friend, but still managing to gain twice his size.
You never knew how to deal with gifts and chances. You ungrateful bastard. But I will tell you something... what you think does not matter anymore. Jeremy gave me a present as well. There is a little bit of me in your body. In all your bodies. And now I decide what you do. ATTACK.
It extended his arms to both sides, thin, dark lines oozed out of his fingertips and connecting to the animatronics who stepped back, but were surrounded.
Yet, somehow nothing happened.
I... Jeremy... did not connect them. How? This is a blatant mistake...
Chica chuckled. "Playing all high and mighty, I see. You're an asshole. Stop embarrassing yourself!"
I... YOU BRATS!
Mike wanted to step in between the fight, annoyed beyond the point of irritation, but all of a sudden the Marionette moved forwards and something hit him, breaking, splitting his mind apart.
Inside of a suit, they kept him inside, he was bleeding, he couldn't breathe, GET OUT, HE NEEDED TO GET OUT! There he stood, black eyes, black smile, watching him DIE, no, still breathing he was BREATHING, stand up, STAND UP and ATTACK, HE NEEDED TO END HIM, BEFORE HE DIED, HE COULDN'T DIE, not now, the body was getting colder, standing, he was now standing, stepping to the smugly grinning man, wouldn't be smug if I rip his throat open, ending it, ending it all-
"Mike, Mike, what are you doing?!"
Phasing in and out, they stood before him, PG was trying to touch him, DON'T TOUCH ME, I'm bleeding, no, those words wouldn't come out, his jaw was locked with metal spikes, the more he tried to move, the deeper the metal cut, metal, metal in his body...
The animatronics were glitching on the spot as well, fighting against an instinct, an instinct to fight, KILL, RUN AND ESCAPE, GET OUT, GET OUT, THE BODY WAS GETTING SO TIRED...
Now someone was touching him, it was the monster, checking his breath, forcing him deeper into the spikes, no it was his friend, trying to calm him, it was so loud, so loud, don't dare coming closer, I will kill you, I will kill you for what you've done...
"Please, come back to us, what's going on!?"
If he died now, the man would kill more, test, test, you're nothing but a test, more will follow, protect them, help them, SAVE them, KILL, KILL HIM...
"Puppet, if don't stop right now, you will regret this. I say this in my power not only as manager of this pizzeria, I say this in my power as his friend."
The pain slowly decreased, reality slowly seeped back as he regained some sanity. Phone Guy was holding him close, preventing him from falling.
The puppet had slung himself around Jeremy again, his eyes brightly lit.
Never dare to call me a joke ever again. This was only a taste of my capabilities.
Old Sport sighed, disappointed. "Thus, the party was ruined."
One more word and I will slit your body open from the ground to the base of your chin.
"Oho! But wouldn't you need to leave Jeremy for that? And you wouldn't want to traumatize him now, wouldn't you? Became pretty soft, didn't you?"
I...
"Go on, leave him. Let's TALK with him and see what he thinks!"
I do not fear his reaction. I do not care about him more than I care about my mission.
"Prove it."
Calmly the Marionette unwound itself from Jeremy and floated away. The poor, confused guy rubbed his eyes.
"What was going on?! I couldn't hear anything!"
"Nothing much, your friend only tried to kill us all."
"What?! Bummer. I thought he was doing better."
"BUMMER?! YOU CALL HIM ALMOST KILLING US A BUMMER?!"
"Well, I knew he would try it eventually... but I hoped it wouldn't happen so soon."
You... knew?!
"Of course!" Yawning, the young man straightened his hat and raised to his full height. "I'm not stupid. No matter what people say, I'm neither an idiot, nor unobservant! I didn't put the screws in for a reason. Fazebear entertainment, the one who used Freddy, Chica, Bonnie and Foxy for the first time, didn't open until roughly 1980, because until then, it was called Fredbear's family dinner. Now, why was it forced to close and bought out? Because the incident with Fredbear. Not even today is anyone allowed back into the building, because of Fredbear. They did a good job on covering it up, but I found some evidence... so, what has that to do with me knowing your intention and not falling for your lie? Well, let's go back to Fredbear's family diner. Up until its zenith, 1974, where they introduced brand new animatronics, it was a business as every other. So, what happened shortly after? I searched for old newspaper in archives of the city. I especially looked at the job section... after the introduction, suddenly the frequency of job offers increased by a billion. Someone was killing the guards. You told me yourself you were here until the beginning. You were the guard-killer, since the day you possessed... whatever it was."
In utter shock they all stared at him. Jeremy grinned.
"But not only do I know that! I know one thing more!" Dramatic he pointed at his friend. "YOU KILLED THE KIDS!"
"What the fuck?!"
Excuse me!?
"Oh, good, I almost took Jeremy serious for a second... that was close!"
"I HAVE A THEORY! After you died the cruel death of being dismissed by the adults in the building, you began hating them with a passion strong enough to overpower death! But, it wasn't enough. A kid on his own can get lonely, no kid should be forced to be isolated like that... seeing the other kids leave for the night filled you with envy and contempt! Understandable, but still a dangerous mixture. One day it was simply too much. You lured the kids away and killed them, the same way you died, in hope of getting the same result. It's obvious that it was you, because how else could there be no real evidence against the suspect? The bodies were never found, because you stuffed them away in a place you knew they wouldn't look, because the killer would never have the time to hide them there! As the kids woke up, you filled their heads with lies, fearing they would leave or isolate you! You made them join your crusade against the adults you perceived as the enemy. Now that you're gone out of the pizzeria for a while, they don't have the burning hate anymore that you provided and so they began to test the "enemy", to see how evil they truly are. Not at all, of course, they became friends, making you afraid once again. What if they didn't understand you anymore? Hate you?! Then I came along, giving you a solution. If a part of you was connected with the others, you would feel what each other feel and you could make them join your side again."
No one even moved.
Then Phone Guy poured himself another shot. "Great work, Jeremy."
"You think so, sir?!"
I mean... it wasn't totally wrong... just... very wrong.
"At least it was a nice story!"
"Yeah, entertaining nonetheless!"
The other Guards were nodding among each other, trying to find the right words. Jeremy on the other side was breaking down.
"You mean I'm WRONG?! I put so much effort into my research! A-at least I'm right when I said you wanted the link to kill people, right?!" Panicked he looked at the Puppet, who slowly floated downwards.
Yes... I admit it.
"Phew... it would have been awkward if you actually just wanted to help, I would feel horrible for not doing as you asked."
Wait, you lied to me!
"I promised you to help you doing good! And I will! Forever! But killing more people isn't good, so I decided to talk about it with you first."
When were you going to tell me?
"After Christmas, because I wanted to relax with you!" Friendly smiling, the boy took his hand. "You aren't angry with me, are you? Would be kinda hypocritical..."
Dave had finished his plates with sweets and leaned back. "Am I the only person here who didn't lie to my friend?"
Old Sport frowned. "Hey, I never lied to you either!"
"Okay, are we two the only honest people around here?"
Awkward silence ensued.
"Well, whatever, Christmas is over now anyway." Mike stood up, angry. "Who takes the nightshift?"
The animatronics murmured. "As long as the puppet stays out of here, we're fine on our own."
"Surprisingly, I don't fucking believe you. I will stay here."
"I will stay with you."
Annoyed Mike ignored PG. "Now leave, Jeremy, take your piece of shit of a friend with you. Dave and Orange, go and suck each other off, I don't care. Just leave."
Everyone, either too tired or too frightened to argue, left, even the animatronics went towards the tree, sitting around it and peacefully watching it. Freddy was surprised as the human boss gave him his present, but didn't say anything. A new soft bowtie and a top hat with a golden stripe were inside.
Phone Guy had stayed close to Mike, accompanying him into the office, silently muttering under his breath. "Better than last year at least... it was somewhat fun."
"Yeah. It wasn't as bad as lying in bed and hating the world."
A second his boss maybe wanted to say something, but he simply tilted his head (smiling as Mike felt confident to assume) and sat down next to him, telling him weird stories of customers.
And covering him with the blanket after he fell asleep.

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A/N:
I didn't mean this to escalate so much and I'm sincerely sorry for probably ruining a wholesome Christmas. I hope you enjoyed despite that! If you think I should be more careful with the atmosphere and keep happy things happy, then I'll listen to you...
Comments are all I need for a great Christmas, so if you feel like it, I'd love to hear your impression of the last chapters! °D°
Wishing you all the best gifts and great food! Enjoy your days!
(Oh and it goes without saying that there's going to be a chapter on New Year, right?)