Soulmate Au but it's Johnlock! (UNDER HEAVY EDITING- 10/19/2020)

"Star gazers~"

  It's been ages since their friendship was declared in a game of Pirates. Sherlock, however, had not been over John's house yet. And, since the band kids had been making fun of him and John's been standing up for him, Sherlock wants to know how he can fight so well. John didn't want Sherlock to make plans to come over or him go over his house because Child protective services called and said they're going to move him again. John didn't know how to tell Sherlock, so he didn't. He knew it was wrong and since Sherlock is John's best friend and he should give him a heads up, but he couldn't bear to see the possible hurt expression on Sherlock's face.  It's not like they'd see each other again, so Sherlock can't really hold it against him for any of it.

  Weeks into a new month and that called for an astronomy lesson, where they would lie on the roof of the shed, looking up onto the sky. "So, people in classes keep writing on my arms and stuff," Sherlock said, pulling up his sleeve to show the scrawling of a marker on his forearms, "and I don't know who's doing it. I bet it's Jim!" He gasped. John laughed. "The Irish one?" He asked, propping himself up in an elbow to look at Sherlock. John's figures out a way to look at Sherlock, but not get lost in his eyes, not in a gay way, though. Sherlock's eyes were just the perfect blend of everything that anyone would be able to fall into a gazing trance when looking into them, so John decided to look at the newly developing cheekbones at first, but he'd stare at those, too. Then, there were the eyebrows, which after a while of someone staring at your eyebrows, you'd tend to notice, so Sherlock would make various movements to his eyebrows to give of the impression of various different emotions, which would confuse John. But, the worst one was when he decided to look at Sherlock's mouth. "Yeah, the Irish one. He's so mean. He like, flirts with almost everyone, but doesn't mean any of it." Sherlock said, smiling a bit because he knew that caught John's attention. "I don't know why, but he tries to flirt with me the most." Sherlock continued as he lie back down. "Orions belt," Sherlock pointed to the sky and moved his hand to line up with his sight of the three stars lined up in the sky. "But, you don't like him, right?" John asked. Sherlock chuckled, leaving room for John to doubt his own position with the boy-not that he wanted one! "I don't know, maybe?" He said, pulling his hands behind his head and looking back into John's eyes. "Why, though? You said he was mean." John wavered, trying to change his mind. "Who else would ask me to the semi-formal? Unless I were to take you, but surely you wouldn't want to go with a freak like me." Sherlock mused with a sad smile as he slowly turned to the skies again. Of course, John was contemplating saying that he's love to go, but even though it did seem like Sherlock wanted the latter, that would've been awkward after the 'lips incident.' Clearly, Sherlock didn't want to go out with John and play that would be plenty gay if they did, but Sherlock seems accepting, considering he just confessed to maybe likening an Irish boy in his class. "But, What about your soulmate? Don't you want to, you know, stay pure or whatever?" John asked. Sherlock froze up and that was a bad thing. John struck a nerve and he knew by the way he was trying not to look John in the eyes, that he shouldn't have said what he said.

  "What about you, hm? Don't you think it's a bit hypocritical of you to be saying such things and go out with another girl, and try to kiss your male friend, John?" Sherlock asked, furrowing his brow as he said it. "Look, Sherlock. Im Sorry of your soulmate died or whatever, but you don't have to mark my words." John said. "Besides, Mary and I are, in a sense, soulmates, I guess." John sighed dreamily, not noticing Sherlock's breath was suddenly caught on something in his heart. Sherlock's eyebrows quirked and furrowed upward and he bit his lip briefly. "Little Dipper," John pointed out. "What makes you say that?" Sherlock asked, finally letting out a breath he shouldn't have been holding. "Little dipper?" John asked with eyebrows furrowed and a sarcastic smile on his face. "No," Sherlock shook his head in his hands, tangling the curls in his palms and not caring, "the, uh, the other thing. S-soulmate thing, you know?" He asked, not wanting to say it, but he needed validation. He needed closure. This was the first time talking to John about soulmates and he needed to know why John didn't consider himself to be a hypocrite. There just might be hope for them yet. "Oh, well don't judge, but she doesn't have a soulmate, and well, er, uh, haha, umm, I don't have a soulmate, per say, really, but doesn't that mean that we're ironically soulmates, then?" John said nervously, half expecting Sherlock to push him off the roof and tell him to not come back. "I wish it did, John Watson. I wish it did." Sherlock said curtly as he stood up and climbed down from the roof, telling John that Astronomy night was through. John couldn't help but let his chest tighten as Sherlock silently walked back inside. John stayed out and waited for his aunt to pick him up.

  The next morning, John's aunt called him and Harry down for news and breakfast. "So, Harry; John. Sit down." She said, making them both nervous. John, last night, before I picked you up, I got the call." She said, and John couldn't have felt more hurt, sad, grieving, and somewhat happy, more than he did then. "Are you sure?!" He asked, banging his hands to the table. Startling his sister. "Calm down, John." She said. "No! I can't be an outcast again! I can't do it. I just got somewhere, and I can't go back to square Zero! No, I won't! I have a group, a best friend! I have a girlfriend here, and I'm not going to give that up!" He shouted. John was on the verge of tears now and he didn't want to be. He needed to be strong, and he couldn't budge now. "Well, you're going to have to, John! The family wants you! I can't do anything about it, unless you want harry to get taken away to another family, too!" She yelled back, silencing the kids. "So, I'm not going with John?" Harry asked. "No, Harry. You're staying here a bit longer. They only want John. I'm sorry." She said. Harry stood, grabbed her bag and stormed upstairs. John followed, less angrily.

  "Harry, please come out." John said, knocking on the door. "Do you know why the family only wants you, John?" She asked, presumably sliding he sink contents off of the sink counter. "Aunt Neliss. Lied! She told them you had a soulmate! And, the all know that mine died, and All because she wanted to travel in space with that Captain or Doctor or whatever he was! Nobody wants someone like me, John! Well, you know what! I never asked to be like this! I wanted to love someone, and now I'm bloody broken! Nobody likes broken things!" She screamed. It hurt John to see his sister like this. "How the fuck do you think I feel, Harry!" He shouted, having enough. "At least you had a chance! At least you got to meet your soulmate! I don't even have one, dammit! I wail never love anyone! Everyone's finding theirs and is getting to love, but not fucking me! I feel empty. There's nothing there most times. I feel nothing when I'm with Mary-!" John stopped, realizing what he said. 'No, that's not true, then why did I say it?' He thought to himself. "I'm going to school." He said gruffly, pulling his bag over his shoulder and walking fast down the stairs. His aunt stood there, leaned over the table, silently crying. John patted her on the back. She looked down to him and saw his devious smirk. "Let's make it a day to remember, eh?" He asked, making her laugh a bit.