Forbidden Love .

6_ pushing you away

lillia P.O.V

Now I Know why people see me as weirdo , now i see it i'm being so odd . when i finally found a friend , and a great one , i'm pushing him away , i can't believe it . But after all , this is all for a reason , i'm falling for him. which i can't and i know that very well , but we can't control what the heart wants , can we ? . well , this is what my heart want , he want him and only him . but this love can't happen , it's a forbidden love .

I promised i would never let him go , but i didn't keep it and i'm feeling awfull , he is nothing but nice to me , whenever he come closer i push him away , he will never get why i am doing this , but believe me it's for his own good , i can never hurt him like that it will just tear me apart .

" Hey stranger . "

" Hey , Adam ." 

" Tell Me what is it ? " , and just like that he felt it , i knew he knows something was wrong , he just wanted to tell him , he always do that , but this time i didn't tell him , this time i didn't share with him .

" Adam , have you even been in love ? " , adam sighes loudly , this was a big , deep question but i need answers , i need consulation .

Adam was gazing out , thinking about my question , focused on something , or someone .

" Yes , and a really deep one , i guess . " , I saw pain in his eyes , he is really hurting , but he didn't tell me about it , i think this topic is so sensitive , that we both didn't share to each other .

" How it felt to be away from the one that you love ? " , he didn't have to tell me , to know that he is away from the one that he love , his eyes are really exposing him .

" It like living in hell , it burns but you can't step away , because the pain that you handle is more easier than you see the person that you love in that hell . " , That explains so much , he is trapped just like me , he wanna be out of this love but at the same time he loves being there , it's like a maze thrilling but scary at the same time .

I gave adam just a litlle smile and he understood , to not ask me any thing because when it's time i'll share it with him .

i was walkin into class when i saw alex , heading there with his friends , he really likes them and he never fail to show it , i don't wanna overreact but he is really perfect , i never got the chance to meet them , or i never gave alew the chance to introduce us .

" Hey , lills i'm glad we bumbed into you , we never get the chance to talk while we get in the class " , and here come the nice alex and lillia will just feel horrible for ingnoring him .

" Alex , I'm glad i saw you too . "

" Really , you are , well you don't act like it . " , The gorgeous girl behind alex remarked what i was like lately and i don't blame her , if alex noticed that I'm ignoring him I'm sure his friends did too , and i don't blame if they are pissed .

" Annabelle , please this is so unnecessary. " , he defending me again , he supported again and he is here for me like always and what i did , completly erased him like he wasn't there .

i opened my mouth but i was speechless , i had nothing to say for my defence.

" finally, you all got to meet so lills this is chris and this is annabelle , my two buds."

" I'm lillia . " , i already knew who they were . chris gave me a warm smile which put me in ease , but annabelle was pissed at me , she was nice to the boys but so cold towards me .

the professor came and interrupted our awkward situation , everyone made their way to the class , i was going too , but alex grapped my hand again and all those emotions were coming back at me .

" lillia , can we please talk after class , i really need this . " , he was looking at me , his eyes were screaming "i need you " .

" of course alex lets meet after class . "

Alex P.O.V

I've never felt like this for someone . i was never a ladies man , i don't really have much experience in that field , girls were throwing themselves over me i saw that i wasn't blind but i never cared , i was neve intersted in one of them , they were fake no one of them was sincere , call me old fashioned but I've always waited for the right girl to come , i had dreams about her . and when i saw lills i was attractive to her , she was the actress in my dream , the blut in them came clear when i saw lills .

i know it sounded stupid , but i wanted her the first time i landed my eyes on her , and when i get to know her i wanted to mark her mine , I'm falling for her .

but she was pushing me away and that killed me , i had a lot of thoughts , i doubted myself . maybe i was bad to her , did something wrong , but when i look into her eyes i know she doesn't feel like that , she was hurting too and i wanted her to share it with me. those thoughts were killing me , and i had to put an end to this i have to talk to her .

i didn't concentrate at class at all , i was so busy thinking about her , looking at her , no one was there but her . this is bad , this feeling is consuming me but i didn't care , i love that feeling .

the bell rang so does my heart , here comes the moment of truth , when we face each other . i was afraid of what is coming , what if i was bad for her ? , what if she thoughts that i was so annoying ? . stop , those thoughts needed to stop they were killing me .

" Lills , are you ready ? . " i saw the hesitate look on her face , like she was afraid , she was puzzuled . i hated to see that on her , i wanted her to open up for and let me in .

we made our way to the garden , it was peacefull and the perfect place for our talk , when i turned around lillia was smiling at the view , it was perfet the smile , i wanted that smile for me , was that too much to ask ? .

" this place is great , I've never saw this place . "

" i would've showed you but lately you cuted me out ." , and by that her smile disappeared , well done alex , well done.

" alex don't say that , I've never meant to hurt , i would never do that to you ,please don't hate me. you don't know how much you mean to me . "

" i know you would never do that , even if you did lills , even if you cuted me to pieces , you rip me and i would never be mad at you forget hating you , this is how much you mean to me . "

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and im back with a new update , this one is short I'll try to make the next one longer , i hope u will like it and enjoy it .

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