Everett McHughes
"McHughes! you’ve got an hour, before your doctor appointment. Spend it well." the correctional officer said, walking away. I sigh and get up and sit at the desk in my cell. I pull out two piece of yellow legal paper and pen and begin writing.
My dearest daughter,
You know I had a dream about you last night. It was when you were at your dance recital. You begged me that entire week to make time to go see you dance. I told you I would think about it and I’ll never forget the look or disappointment on your face. That moment stayed with me that entire week up until I turned up and cancelled my work schedule for the entire day and planned a surprise for you. In the middle of your dance routine, you stopped completely when you saw my face. Your face lit up the New York skyline. Believe it or not, the look on your face when I showed up has kept me going for the past 12 years. My little bumblebee, my angel, my superstar. I know I’m the last person you want to hear from, but I need to speak with you. I understand it maybe too much for you to come see me, but I’ll ask anyway. I’m not the man I was that night you watched me kill your mother and brother. I’ve had a lot of time to think of what I’ve done. I know I can never excuse what I’ve done, but I just wish that you could find it in you heart to forgive me. Even if you never wish to never see me again. I just need you to find it in your heart to forgive me. All you have to do is write ‘I forgive you’ on a piece of paper and send it to me. But I really need to see you, there’s somethings you need to know.
Love you more than life,
-Dad
I stared at the picture I had of my daughter and me after her dance recital. She was staring at me with nothing but joy in her eyes, while she held the flowers I got her for a job well done. That night I took my wife and son’s life eats me alive everyday. But the look of fear on my daughter’s face when she witnessed it all is what kills me the most. I hope this letter finds her and replies. There isn’t much time left.
Elan
After Sunday mass, I went to sit- in at Jacob’s practice for Tuesday. I must say he got a lot done is all of 2 days. “Wow Jacob, you’ve really outdone yourself here.” I said, watching in amazement. “You know the moment, you handed me your phone number. Something in me just clicked, I performed for talent shows so I had routines all together. No I’m just going into overtime to make sure everything is perfect for your boss.” he replied, taking a sip of his water. “Well, your hungriness is inspiring. I wish more artists were like you. It’s like they lose sight of what made them successful in the first place. They lose that drive to become better than there last project.” I said. “True, can you promise me something?” he asked. “What’s that?” I asked. “If I ever get too big in the head, please bring me back down to earth, by any means necessary.” he said, looking me deep in the eyes. “Of course.Girl Scouts honor Promise.” I said, extending my pinky. “Wow, what a cornball.” he said, locking his pinky with mine. “Whatever, get back to practice.” I said. “Yes ma’am.” he said, jogging back to his group. Heather hasn’t called nor text me so I just sat there bored. As I sat there, I let my mind wander off.
*Flashback*
"Elan, honey hurry up and pack the rest of your clothes. You too Evan, we’re not coming back here." my mother ordered us. "Yes mom" Evan and I replied. "Why are we leaving home? And why can’t we tell dad?" I asked Evan. "Dad did something bad." he replied, stuffing his clothes and toys into his suitcase. "What bad thing did he do?" I asked. "Elan, just something bad. I’ll tell you when we get situated, now go finish packing like mom said." He said, shoving in my room. I begin taking my clothes and toys and putting them neatly in my princess suitcases. I didn’t understand why were leaving our home. Two days ago, I woke up in a hotel bed next to my brother. I haven’t been to school or dance practice, I miss my friends. "Evan, why can’t we just stay here with dad?" I asked, dragging my two heavy suitcases into the hallway. "Jesus Elan! Dad did something bad and it hurt mommy’s feel- Oh my God! dad’s here!" Evan said, with the look of horror in his eyes. "YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST TAKE MY KIDS, PACK UP AND LEAVE? HUH? HU-!" I overheard my father screaming, then I heard my mother scream and then a loud thud on the floor. "Elan stay here, I’m going to help mom." Evan said. "Wait no Evan I’m scared. What’s happening to mom? Why is dad yelling?" I asked with tears in my eyes. "That’s what I’ll go find out. If you’re scarred, go hide in the closet." he said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "Okay." I said, hugging him tightly. "What’s with the hug? I’ll be right back." he said smiling, then walking out of the room. I was scared until I heard Evan’s voice, telling dad to call down. Then I heard my mom scream ‘NO’ and a loud sound. I quietly walked to my parents room, by walking through the bathroom, connecting to the master bedroom and stared into the crack of the door open. I grew numb as I saw my mother, on the floor, in her own pool of blood. Fresh tears burned my eyes as I watch my mother take her last breath. Evan cried as he held our mother’s lifeless body. "I HATE YOU! YOU KILLED MY FUCKING MOTHER! YOU CRAZY BASTARD! I HOPE YOU DIE! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" Evan shouted, while rocking my mother’s lifeless body back and forth. "That’s good Evan. Hate your father, hate me with all your might. You’re right, I am crazy. But you know what else? I don’t give a fuck." my dad replied, raising his gun to Evan’s chest. "So you’re gonna shoot me? Shoot your only son? What happened to the father I use to want to be like when I grow up? When the cops come you can kiss your freedom goodbye, I hope you rot in hell." Evan spoke with passion. Tears fell down my father’s face as he reacted to the heartfelt declaration coming from his only son. "Even though you mean that I still love you son. Say hello to your mother for me." he said, putting three bullet holes in Evan’s chest. Blood splattered everywhere, including on the door I was hiding behind. Completely numb, I stood there and watched my brother die. Before he died, his eyes landed on mine. He smiled and mouthed ‘I love you’ and closed his eyes. I whimpered aloud, but covered my mouth, my father heard it. He turned towards the bathroom door. He pushed the door open and saw me motionless. He got down on his knees and pointed the gun towards himself, with tears in his eyes. "Shoot me. Daddy’s sick in the head honey. Please, do it. DO IT!" he shouted.
"Elan! Hellooooooo. ELAN!" Jacob screamed, snapping his fingers in my face. "What, what happened?" I asked, completely caught off guard. "We’re done, we can leave now." he said. "Oh right, I knew that." I said, getting up, a little shaken up. Once I put my chair back, Jacob and I headed out. "What were daydreaming about? You were zoned all the way out." Jacob asked. "Uhh it was nothing. That’s what happens when I have time to myself, I think a lot. You hungry?" I replied, trying to change the subject. "I could eat, what’d you have in mind?" he asked, getting into the car. "Well I hope you have an appetite for Caribbean food." I replied, starting the car. "Island gyal I see. Let’s go." he said, in a horrible Jamacian Patois accent. "Who’s the cornball now, mon?" I rhetorically asked. "Whatever." he said. I pulled out of the dance studio’s parking lot and drove off. My mind still on the flashback I just had. I need to get that under control, but how? I thought.
