Rough Waters

14

(Jewel POV) (April 29, 2017) (7:35pm)

At this point I'm just empty... I'm full and empty at the same time. I have nothing left to give Tyler or this situation but I'm full of resentment, confusion and anger. I feel like I was just in a relationship with myself. Like this whole thing was a figment of my imagination. Was I too into this? Was I just another notch under his belt? What were his true intentions? These are questions I'm too afraid to ask because of the answers I might receive. Now a piece of him is inside of me, motherhood is the scariest path I'm gonna walk down and I don't want to walk down this path without the father of my child but i'll prepare for the worst.

My driver pulled up to Tyler's expensive brownstone penthouse in Manhattan, after a couple minutes of me standing outside his door aimlessly I finally gained enough courage to knock.

I heard some shuffling in the background then I was met with his face... the face of the man I love. The face of the man who couldn't give me anything but false hope and empty promises. Voice mailboxes and unanswered text messages, was what I saw when I looked at him. I also saw tender kisses, late- night love making sessions and romantic spontaneous dates. I'm sick with confliction and I can't escape this mental prison he has chained me to.

"Jewel?"

"Huh?"

"Come in, I have things to do today so we need to make this quick."

I walked inside of his apartment and before I could get a greeting in I was met with his bad attitude. Things to do? Quick? This stranger used to be a man who couldn't wait to spend all his time with me, stayed up under me and couldn't go to sleep without hearing my voice. Now I'm in the way.

"Tyler I dont appreciate the-"

"You came to my place wasting my time, I didn't have to agree to this."

Thats it..

"Your gonna sit down and fucking listen to me you pompous, entitled, emotionally detached piece of shit!!!! I have put up with you ignoring me and treating me like shit for too long! If you don't want me FINE! If you don't love me GOOD! But, the least you can offer me as a human being is some respect!" I yelled and released a minuscule amount of emotions.

It was time, I had been playing his sick, twisted games for way too long. Yes, I'm in love with this worthless son of a bitch but I'm realizing that as a woman and a human I have a voice and deserve respect. I can't let anyone slide, this hold he has on me needs to me loosened, for my emotional sake.

Silence... What else did I expect.. A lot sadly.

"Alright."

"Alright? I just- what? Okay Tyler what's going on, because when I first came in you didn't want to talk or say shit to me."

"I know but your right I should at least listen to you since you obviously can't let go."

"I can't let go because for six months of my life I spent time with YOU! Learning about you and what you like. I fell in love with someone who I thought I could be open with and then I was abandoned without a single explanation as to why, so excuse me for needing closure. If you were any source of a man you would have been honest with me from the very beginning. I told you I have trust issues, I told you things and shared my space with you not just physically but emotionally too and for you to dodge me like a little boy, just proves to me who you really are Tyler and I promise you this child growing inside of me will never possess any of your qualities because I'm going to raise them to be the exact opposite of you. I hope you sleep well at night knowing you broke my spirit and heart. Goodbye Tyler."

I didn't even need to say anything else, was that the way I planned on breaking my pregnancy to Tyler? Of course not.. but, my emotions were overloaded and I couldn't contain them and everything just came pouring out. I headed for the door and didn't even bother to look at his facial expression once I said that.

"Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. What did you just say?" He said blocking my way to the front door.

"Oh! Now I got your attention, wow who knew that was all it would take." I said with an amusing smirk on my face. All this ignoring and pushing me away but once I bring up my pregnancy he perks up. SO typically of niggas like Tyler.

"Jewel i'm not fucking playing with you. Are you pregnant ?" He asked looking me up and down. I was only 1 month into my pregnancy so he couldn't tell I was pregnant just by looking at me.

"I'm not playing either, you are the most evil man I have met. I was gonna come here and bare my soul to you and tell you about this pregnancy in hopes we could work something out for our child's sake but your impossible so-"

"I knew you were one of those." He said laughing.

"One of who?" I said confused.

"The type of bitch to trap a nigga just cuz he is out here grinding making a name for himself."

"Do you really believe that? That ,that's the reason I started dating you? Because of your status and money? Nigga don't let the proper grammar and shy nature fool you I'm not the motherfucking one. I don't need ANYBODY'S money, I take care of myself. I grew up around money, material objects, celebrities all of that so I know what money and status looks like I was born into it. Unlike you, a simple minded, ignorant ass nigga who throws a football up and down a field and gets some attention for it and suddenly thinks he is god. You ain't shit! Your body is gonna break down by the time your 35 and your small sized brain is gonna catch up with it! So for you to have to audacity to accuse me of trapping you is completely absurd. I never make it a habit to fuck raw but I made a mistake and now I have to live with it, you on the other hand don't you can continue being the fucked up person you are because we're gonna be okay."

"Whatever man. Good luck with that."

"I don't need luck, I got god, my family and friends thank you very much and all of this is over." I said my final words to him and left his building.

Weight off my shoulders... still terrified as ever.