(A/N: The prompts with "" quotation marks are from the internet and/or tumblr. The prompts with "" quotation marks are mine.)
"Ma'am/Sir, is this your dog?"
"No, it's really not that complicated. He's a bad person."
"Hey... what's wrong with your face?"
"The king is missing."
"Ah yes, come in. Close the door behind you."
"How could you do this to me?"
"Um, sorry. That one's not for sale."
"You've got thirty seconds to explain to me what you're doing here."
"Ain't nobody ever told you who your real daddy is?"
"I know this may be hard to believe, but I'm on your side."
"Never heard of that being used as a murder weapon before."
"Just sit around and cry, then. I don't have that luxury."
"I'm sorry. I thought you were someone else."
"That's the nice thing about telling the truth. You don't have nearly as much to keep track of."
"Of course we're best friends. No one else would put up with our shenanigans."
"That's the least of your worries."
"You look a lot different from your profile picture."
"Do you trust me?"
"You found it on the beach? You know, when most people take a walk on the beach, they pick up seashells."
"Sir. This is for children only."
"What? I meant it as a compliment."
"Who put this in my coat pocket?"
"I can't do this any more."
"You think you're so good-looking, but deep down, you're the kind of ugly that PhotoShop can't fix."
"I know you did your best, but it just wasn't enough."
"Even if I could stop it, I wouldn't."
"You have got to see this."
"Guess who made the evening news?"
"I don't really think of myself as a thief..."
"Are you just going to keep walking by my house or are you going to come in?"
"We do things a little differently in the 21st century."
"Please return to your assigned seat."
"Dude. It's 3 in the morning."
"I can't believe I used to think he was attractive."
"Actually, you are speaking to the manager."
"Where are your clothes?"
"Well, this contest isn't going to right itself."
"Hi, I'm calling about your ad?"
"I can't believe I'm telling you this."
"I should have told you this a long time ago."
"I am only telling the truth when I say that you have not behaved completely as a gentleman in this matter."
"I thought we were friends!"
"That's not a good look."
"It's a genetic trait, but it's exceptionally rare."
