Mental 2 | Jungkook

22

It was such a sudden straightforward question I was speechless.

"Listen, ever since we have been dating, I feel like we didn't have a proper connection you know?" He says to me.

I was still silent, until he bites his lips and rolls his eyes. "Just admit it already (Y/N), holding what your feeling inside won't make things any good."

"I.. I guess so.." I mumble.

"It's just.. this past month has been quite difficult for me.."

He raised an eyebrow. "Difficult? In what way?"

"I can't exactly tell you.. "

"And why can't you? What could it be that you just can not tell me huh?" He raises his voice just a slight bit.

Yoongi never really shouted at me at all, in fact.. I've never seen him raise his voice. He was always the calm type of guy who just accepts what's happening and doesn't show much reaction.

"I.. I really can't.. it's hard to explain even if I tell you"

He nods his head slowly while looking around the restaurant, then he lifts his glass up and sips wine from it.

He inhales hardly and then exhales loudly, I could hear the sound of his deep breath.

He may have never got angry or raised his voice, but when he's pissed.. it's something you never want to witness. The feeling inside of me was filled with guilt every second I looked at him.

"Oh for the love of God, This is bothersome as fuck. I already know okay?" He spurted out.

How.. How could he have known?
No wait, let's not jump into conclusions,
He could be talking about something else!
Yeah!

"Know what..?" I ask him.

"A few days ago I wanted to visit you so I saw a guy go out your house and you warmly waved at him. Now I first got angry, thinking you've suddenly decided to date someone behind my back and so I did a little research. I followed him. But he just went for a walk in the park. So, I deliberately bumped into him and started a conversation. And so when I asked his name..."

"Y-Yoongi.. I was going to tell-"

He raised his right hand up signaling for me to stop talking.

"If it was someone else.. God I would have been angry. But I realized it's someone I know you loved before me, for quite a while. And still always thought about. Like when you would whisper his name in your sleep."

"You knew about my dreams.." I realized.

"I always knew. Listen (Y/N), the reason I even brought up that would should date was because I wanted to fill that empty hole of happiness inside of you. But I know no one can fill it. Well.. besides him of course."

"So what are you saying? Why say this to me?"

He traced the tip of the glass with his index finger. "Even I also thought we never had 'that' type of connection. Now that think about it.. we always seemed the best friend type, nothing more. And so I'm saying, I would be rather satisfied you being happy, and even if that means you being happy with.. him."

-

I waved at Yoongi goodbye as I walked to my doorstep.

Taking out my keys and unlocking it, I twisted the handle.

Everywhere was dark except for the flashing light coming from the television that was on.

Cloud was sleeping on his tiny bed and ask for Jungkook.. both hands on his stomach, grabbing the TV remote and head tilted towards the side with his mouth slightly open, he was fast asleep on the couch.

I grabbed the folded blanket that was in the corner of the place and unfolded it.

Spreading it on top of him, I tucked the sides gently, trying not to wake him up.

"Goodnight.." I whispered, and then walked to my bedroom.

".. Goodnight" Jungkook smiled with his eyes still shut close.

-TBC-