𝕭𝖑𝖆𝖈𝖐 𝕾𝖊𝖗𝖛𝖆𝖓𝖙 ✔️

[Part 34] A Sudden Change

Hey guys it's author~chan and I wanted to tell you all that I'm planning to update every Tuesday, so once a month, I hope that all of you are able to wait every six days! Well let's start the chapter now~
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You finished taking a shower and dressed up in black pants and a gothic black dress, it was your third time in a dress counting when you were little so you were a little uncomfortable but you wore it for your mother, you looked in the mirror and sighed being reminded of your mother before leaving the bathroom, you saw Sebastian playing with the cat and giggled "you finished packing all the bags?" You asked as Sebastian turned to you as his eyes widened "Sebastian?" You called him as he blinked a few times and stood up quickly "oh yes m'lady, I've packed all the bags including the young masters'" he says as you nodded "alright" you said as you took your bag and left the room, Sebastian watched as you left and continued to play with the cat after you were out of his sight "she's a little cold but nice and pretty" Sebastian says to the cat with a smile on his face

You put your luggage into the carriage and waited for everyone else, you saw Sebastian leave the room as the cat stayed there alone, you walked into the room and picked up the kitten "I'll have to leave you with Cameron" you said quietly as you walked over to his room and knocked on the door, Cameron opened as you also saw William inside "hello mr. assasin" you said with a smile "hello Alessia" he said and smiled back " I want you to keep this kitten until I see you again" you said handing over the cat to Cameron as he looked over at it "why me?" He asked as you laughed "I can't take it back to the phantomhive mansion because Ciel's allergic to cats" you say as Cameron makes an 'o' shape with his mouth "alright I understand" Cameron says with a smile as he takes the cat into his arms "well today is the last day that I'll see you until we meet again someday" you say with a tiny sigh "that's right, though it was really nice to see you again I really wanted to see how much you improved in fighting" he laughed "why not then?" You asked as he shook his head "you still have more people to say goodbye to and I don't want to waste your time, we can do that some other day" Cameron said as you nodded slowly "understandable, I'll be going now Cameron, thanks for the vacation" you thanked him as he smiled "no problem, anything for my little butterfly" he said while waving as you walked away going to Alois' and Claude's room to say goodbye, as you got there you knocked on the door as Claude opened it with a smile "hello y/n, may I ask of what business you're here for?" He asked as you gave him a smile "I'm here to say goodbye to everyone is all" you said as he nodded "ah, alright, Come on in" Claude said as you nodded and went into the room to see Alois laying on his bed, when he saw you he bounced out of bed "Y/n!!! It's so nice to see you honey!" Alois said as you tilted your head "honey..?" You asked "oh never mind that! What are you doing here? Also you're looking amazing" he says with a bright smile on his face "well I'm here to say goodbye, I'm going back to the mansion with everyone today, aren't you supposed to go back to yours too?" You asked as his eyes widened "oh that's right! Claude go pack my bags!" He shouted at Claude as he bowed and started packing his bags "well I have to go now, goodbye Claude, Alois" you said as Alois waved while you left their room and got into the carriage while waiting for everyone

(Time Skip)

The servants were in a different carriage than yours, Sebastian and Ciel's, you already told Sebastian what happened to the kitten, although he was disappointed and sad he understood, all of you were currently on your way to your mothers house as you sighed looking out the window of the carriage

(Time Skip)

You reached your mothers house as you got out of the carriage and stared at it, you fought back your tears and went into the house trying to remember everything that happened when you were little, you smiled at the nice memories but frowned at the last, you walked all over the house and everything was still as it was left, the current owners of the house gave you the permission to come into the house, you were relieved that they were nice enough to keep everything the way it was and to have aloud your mothers grave to be behind the house that they now lived in, you walked over behind the house as everyone else followed you, you saw your mothers grave as you sat down in front of it and looked down at the ground, everyone else stood up but their heads weren't held up "mom, I'm sorry for not staying for longer, I wish that I were a better daughter and....." you sighed in the middle of your sentence "a better human being, but I'm also sorry for having been born as a demon and not knowing before.... I want to meet my dad but... it's impossible right..?" You felt tears wanting to fall from your eyes and you couldn't hold it in much longer, you cried and it shocked the servants and everyone else a little, you stood up but your legs felt weak as you fell back onto the ground as Sebastian failed to catch you, you cried your eyes out and suddenly felt a gust of wind blow from behind you pushing your currently weak body onto the floor, everyone else hated to watch you like this but they didn't want to interrupt either "mom.... please forgive me but I can't change, and I won't just for anyone, but I promise you that I won't let you die like this" you said looking down, your eyes hidden underneath your bangs "m'lady.." Sebastian called but you couldn't hear anyone anymore "should we leave 'er alone for now..?" Mey-Rin asked as as Finny, Bard, Jake and Tanaka nodded "me and the young master will stay here you the rest of you will wait in the carriage" Sebastian said as Mey-Rin, Bard, Finny, Jake, And Tanaka nodded and left as they waited in the carriage "guys... just leave me alone for now" you said as Sebastian and Ciel sighed but left either way

(Your Pov)

I closed my eyes and I felt sleepy, my eyes felt puffy and my whole body gave out, I felt bad for everything I did but at the same time... I was satisfied "let's be honest with each other mom..." I started talking knowing that mom's spirit was nearby and that she was listening "I didn't want you to die... I loved you so much, but I had mixed feelings when you did... I was sad but I also thought you deserved it, but either way, I wish you lived even if you hated me for my entire life" I sighed as I said these words, but they were true and I wanted my mom to hear the truth even if it hurt her or not

(3rd Person Pov)

Everyone waited for you at the carriage, it has been 10 minutes from when you arrived and 5 minutes since everyone left you alone "do you think she's alright'?" Bard asks as Finny shrugged "she's probably alright, she'll get over it soon" Ciel says as the servants look down

"Is there anything you also want to tell me..?" You said quietly as you waited for a reply "I know your dead but... I've heard you many times, and now that I'm here I might also be able to see you, mom please say something" you said another sentence but obviously there was still no reply "at least tell me something about dad!" You shouted as air blew on the trees and grass behind your house along with you beautiful black dress, you slowly stood up as the wind continued to blow on your dress and hair, you slightly tilted your head down and your bangs covered your eyes, you sighed as your eyes turned red "I understand... if you won't give me an answer then I'll just force it out of you!" You shouted as you turned around to see your mom standing behind you with tears covering her face "I'm sorry for putting you through all this pain" she cried out as you sighed then laughed "well at least you know what you did to me mother!" You said while not making any eye contact with your mother "it's hard enough for me to die like this, but I can't even forgive myself for what I did to you and your father" your mom said making you giggle "then tell me something about him! You've kept me under your shadow and I've never even gotten the chance to know anything about him!" You shouted as all your surroundings turned black except for you and your mother "I can't... I wish to but you have to figure out yourself.. I understand what you're going through and I'm sorry that I can't help you grow into a better person" she looked down "you understand? Mother I don't think you do! If you did you would've helped me a lot more! At least tell me something about father, about why I'm like this! Why I was born a demon! And I'll be happy" you couldn't keep your anger in anymore as tears also fell from your eyes down your cheeks like a river streaming down paradise "you're father was a demon... but he died 3 years after you were born.." your mothers voice trembled as she spoke "did you know before you married him? Why did you allow me to live such a dangerous life? I'll leave it at that for now, but I definitely will come back and talk to you about this again" you said as your mother nodded

Everything went back to normal and your mother had disappeared, your eyes went back to their natural color and you sighed while shaking your head "what a bunch of bullsh*t" you were obviously angry and this angry state didn't change until a very long time, you didn't purposely act like this but you couldn't control your emotions and would get angry every time you even think about her, everything suddenly changed after one day

You got into the carriage ignoring everyone outside as you sat in the corner alone, on the way back to the mansion you didn't reply to what anyone said nor did you listen to them, you didn't only ignore them but you also didn't even look at them, you were pretty upset even though it wasn't their fault but you couldn't help but feel this way, you yourself didn't know why you acted like this nor why you even are like this but you really just couldn't control yourself, it was like someone else was controlling you, but even though that, you wouldn't change even after many days, you couldn't even smile sincerely nor could you laugh happily, it was like you became someone else