Silenced

Chapter 31- Would You Mind

Chapter 31

Would You Mind

Kaiser Donovan

My dad was worried about me, rightfully so. I had locked myself in my room since we'd gotten home, the bathroom more specifically. He probably thought that I was cutting but didn't want to accuse me. I wasn't. I just felt sick every time that I walked away from the toilet and I didn't like the idea of vomit on the floor of my bedroom.

It took a while but my dad finally decided that he'd rather be safe than sorry. The bedroom door was open and he had gotten the key to the bathroom door. I didn't even look up when he walked in. I expected him to come in much sooner. I prepared myself for the regular, "Are you okay?" But it never came. Instead, he entered the bathroom, closing the door behind him and sat on the floor near me.

We just sat there, doing nothing. His phone rang but instead of picking it up, he had turned it off. It made me smile a little. I began to look around t bathroom, I wasn't really sure what else to do. Observing things blocked out my thoughts for the most part. I looked at the cracks in the tiles on the ground, the water stains on the ceiling and the scratches on the tub. This would've went on for a while if the doorbell hadn't rang, gaining my father and I's attention.

I hated how my heart rate picked up. It was probably just a salesperson. Or a girl scout selling cookies. Or a boy scout selling cookies. Or there was a package to sign for. My father and I both got up. He went downstairs as I stood at the railing watching and listening. He opened the door.

"Hello, Mr. Donovan! " August's voice carried. My eyes widened. I had forgotten about him.

"August, how are you? I haven't seen you in a while. I heard your parents are back. " My dad said.

"Yeah, they just came back. That's actually what wanted to talk to Kai about. Could I come in? "

"Yes, sure. He's in his room. "

Luckily for my father, looks couldn't kill and he couldn't hear my internal screams. I rushed into my room and closed the door. I sat on my bed, pretending as if I had been there the whole time. I grabbed a book that was on my desk and opened it to a random page. This looked normal, right?

Soon enough, August appeared at my door, giving it a light knock. Used to not getting a response, he invited himself in. I narrowed my eyes at him, I should've realized that he would've come here. He wouldn't have just given up and he knew that I wouldn't have told my dad not to let him in. Smart move on his part. Dumb one on mine. I tossed the book aside.

He sat himself in the seat at my desk and twirled in it for a minute or two before working up the nerve to say something.

"Why have you been avoiding me?" He asked.

It got silent while he watched me.

"It probably had something to do with that text you sent me, assuming that was real and not a part of my imagination or some psycho's plan to kill me."

The last part made my chest tighten but I didn't let him realize. He looked away and then back again.

"Was it real?"

He was staring at me now. I was tempted to stare back but I know I'd be first to break so instead I played with my hands. I picked at my clothes. I did anything but look at him.

"Kaiser, I wasn't ignoring you if that's what you thought."

I focused more on the tiny pieces of lint littering my bedsheets.

"And if that is what you thought, you'd have to be very stupid."

My eyes widened and I looked up at him. I wasn't sure if it was me but his eyes looked watery and he seemed mad. A quick turn of events.

"It would be very stupid of you to think that because you know how I feel about you and that hasn't changed over the last few years, it's not going to change now. And if you've been avoiding me because I didn't responded to a single text message which I, by the way, wasn't conpletely sure was actually from you, then you are stupid. Stupid enough to think that I could actually stop-" He cut himself off.

I was back to looking at my sheets.

"I opened the message after practice and my battery died immediately after. I went home to charge it and respond because my car charger wasn't there and my parents were home for the first time in God knows how long. So I forgot to charge it. Or maybe I did, I don't know. But it doesn't even matter because I forgot it at home this morning and I've been trying to tell you this all day but I couldn't because you've been avoiding me! So I had to come all the way here and I sat outside in my car for a good 20 minutes wondering if it was you that texted and whether or not I was going to just be embarrassing myself by coming in here and once again confessing my love for you meanwhile you have no idea what I am even talking about. That is still a possibility and I could just be wasting my breath speaking to you right now. Why am I even here? What is wrong with me?"

He had managed to stand upand pace the small area around my desk during his monologue. I had been starimg at this point. He left in a hurry after he finished talking without even looking at me.

'confessing my love for you'

That's what he said. I repeated the phrase in my head unsure if I had heard it correctly.

I jumped up and ran to the banister and watched him walked down the stairs. My brain and my body had a mini agrument. My mind was trying to convince my legs to go atfer him but my legs weren't having it. I let out a sigh of frustation.

Are you serious, Kai? He bascially just said that he loved you and you still don't have it in you to at least chase after him? Get your ass down those stairs and get him! My inner thoughts yelled at me.

I found myself at the doorway soon enough, just barely catching him as he was about to close his car door. My heart was racing, debating on whether or not I could do it. 'I had to' was my first thought. It would show him that I liked him, right? That he meant something to me. Kind of like a gift or something. Something special, or rare, at least. The door was nearly shut before I could convince myself to do it. Nearly.

"August!"

***********
SUMMER BREAK! I Promise To Be Better To You Guys.

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7/4/18