when he sees me | Jared Kleinman x Reader |

17. You Will Be Found

Y/n's p.o.v.:

When I walked into class everything around me became a blur and I just wanted to leave. I guess you could say that someone listened to my prayers for the first time and we quickly went to the auditorium.

I didn't even know what it was about until I saw the large presentation screen in the auditorium with big blue bolded words 'The Connor Project.'

Then I remembered exactly what Jayden, Jared and Evan were talking about before in first period and I felt terrible for forgetting.

I didn't see any of them and didn't bother to find them, I wasn't in my best mood.

Once the lights dimmed down a bit I felt safe, if I cried no one would be able to find out that I was crying.

Out of the corner of the stage I saw Evan appear and slowly walk to the stage. When he gets to the stage many of the students can hear his faint breathing on the mic.

Before he starts to speak at all he pulls out what looks like at least a packet of index cards and I can see his hand begin to tremble.

[The following is exactly what happens in the play and I took it from the book]

"Good morning, students and faculty." Evan paused as he read his speech from his index cards. "I would, um, I would just like to saw a few words today to you today about...about my best friend Connor Murphy."

"I'd like to tell you about the day that we went to the old Autumn Smile Apple Orchard. Connor and I, we stood under an oak tree, and Connor said he wondered what the world would look like from all the way up there. So we decided to find out." His voice was so faint and filled with anxiety I began to feel bad for him having to be on stage.

" We started climbing slowly, one branch at a time. When I finally looked back, we were already thirty feet off the ground. Connor just looked at me and smiled, that way he always did. And then ... well, then I ..." He paused for a moment and slowly wiped his hand on his shirt.

"I fell." He whispered softly into the mic and everyone around me just stared at Evan as he began to wipe his hands once more.

"I lay there on the ground and then..." It was as if it physically hurt to say these things and I felt even worse when he moved on to the next index card.

"Good morning students and faculty I would um" Through mid-line he found out he was repeating what he had already said and he looked like a small helpless deer as he tried to look for the right index card.

Suddenly, a couple index cards fell followed by more as he tried to pick them up. I heard snickering behind me and I couldn't have felt more pitiful for him.

He looked out into the crowd and small tears began to form as he tried to figure out what to do.

It was as if he finally got rid of his anxiety, because in that moment.

In this exact moment, he stood back up again and placed the index cards back into his pocket.

Jared's p.o.v.:

Get up Evan! I yelled in my head as I stood by Alana and Jayden in the corner of the stage.

Evan had come so far into his speech and now he was going to give up, he couldn't do that.

And to my surprise he didn't, he got back up and began his speech once again, each word more powerful than the last.

" Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere? " The questions he asked in his speech, no one could have expected this from him.

These questions reminded me of y/n what I did to her when we were smaller. I treated her like trash just to fit in. Just so that I could be seen.

In the end I didn't even think about her at all when I did all those stupid things, because in the end she was the one that I always wanted to be friends with.

The girl I secretly loved, and look what I did to her. I made her disappear for about a decade locked away. All because of me.

Evan's p.o.v.:

"But see, the thing is, when I looked up ... Connor was there. That's the gift that he gave me." All these words came tumbling down as I continued to think up things that Connor made me feel. He made me feel truly happy.

" To show me that I wasn't alone. To show me that I mattered. That everybody does. That's the gift that he gave all of us. I just wish ... I wish we could have given that to him." Even though I was lying I was telling the truth when I said that I wish I could've given him this gift that he gave me.

No matter how many times I felt down and wanted to die he was always there from a far. I thought he knew that I also had his back when I decided to sit down next to him last year in one of our classes.

I guess that wasn't enough.

Y/n's p.o.v.:

I could hear some faint gasps and some soft quiet sobs that escaped from people around me as they listened to every word Evan said.

As for me I was already crying, his speech hit me where I thought no one would ever see. All these weaknesses that I have, I thought I was the only one.

I thought I had to fight for everything by myself. But turns out there are other people like me that also need help.

We all have our own battles that we fight constantly each and every day. All of our demons inside.

We can fight them.

Because we have someone to lean on, even if it isn't my mother at the moment. I know a special someone will help me figure out how to fight these battles.

Even when I do feel alone and afraid in the dark, at least I have Jared.

I don't even care anymore about what he has done to me.

These feelings I have for him won't ever change, and I've realized that.

The only problem is that I don't know if he likes me back at all.

Not to mention I felt a weird spark between me and the kid GV from the club that I went to before.

If Jared didn't like me then I at least had  GV.

He gave me his number as well, I think its time to tell him what I've been going through.

Maybe he can help.

With that thought in mind I excused myself from the auditorium and snuck into the bathroom.

I scrolled through my contacts to find his name and pressed his profile picture, which was a [insert image] picture.

There I began to type.

___________

Well...

Hi. I haven't posted in like 4 days and I know please don't murder me!

Anyways one question;

what do you write to GV?

favorite comment gets to be in the next chapter.

:D

- Muse.