Overthinking It || j. m. (UNDER CONSTRUCTION)

24.

Chapter 24

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It's him.

Yeah him- the one with the hair pointed to the sky. The one standing over there looking all cool with his leather jacket. The one with the guitar pick hanging from a chain around his neck and the one tapping his foot while listening to the earphones in his ears. It's him.

I almost turned right back in the direction I came from when I saw him standing there next to his parked car. Except right when I was about to turn on my heels he saw me from across the parking lot, standing like an idiot, and slowly took the earplugs out of his head. So naturally all I could do was walk over to him, my feet dragging on the dirt parking lot of the town park and my shoulders slumped over in their unconfident manner. I reached him, looking down at my feet as I stood like a little lamb in front of him, sort of questioning the whole scenario even as it was playing out before me. I thought to myself how stupid I was to ask him to talk about this so soon, but then I kept thinking and realized he basically was the one to say it in the first place.

"Hi." I heard him say softly, breaking me out of my thoughts. It was a gravely 'hi', one someone makes when there isn't much else to say.

"Hi." Was all I could think of for a response. My feet were still what my eyes were focusing on, and even as the minutes ticked by in awkward silence I couldn't find it in me to break my stare and look him in the eyes. James was probably thinking I was a weirdo at this point, but for all I know he could be doing the same thing. I wasn't looking up at him to know anyway.

Our bit of awkward silence continued on for a few more minutes, our two word exchange being the only talking we did as we stood to the side of his car. Eventually we'd both have to stop being so stubborn, but I wasn't giving in just yet. Sure I was the one that asked to talk to him, but he was also the one who accepted.

After what seemed like stretching eons, James actually spoke up again. He said quietly, like he did before, "Do you want to go for a walk or something? We could just talk, you know?"

I could feel his eyes staring down at me like daggers, and it took everything in me not to look back up at him. In my mind looking him in the eyes meant that I was looking at the guy who betrayed me, and I wasn't too certain I was ready to face that. "Sure." was my simple reply, and without bothering to look at him to see if he was following, I made my way onto the paved walkway stretching around the park, my feet padding silently on it. James fell into step beside me, I could see it out of the corner of my eye, and we walked in a sort of calmed pace where we weren't hasting to go anywhere because there really wasn't anywhere to go.

"So..." He dragged on, hands in his jacket pockets.

"So." I repeated back. It seemed like we were going to be doing this all afternoon, retorting each others words simply because there wasn't really much to say. "You know, I...I'm sorry this was a stupid idea. We shouldn't even be seeing each other right now with everything that went on, and if Taylor sees us that'll just start more drama. I just thought we could talk it out you know, like come to a general equilibrium to try and-"

"Zoe!" James nearly shouted, cutting me off from my incessant rambling that I had begun. It's become a habit of mine ever since I was little- rambling on and on about my worries when I was in a stressful situation. "It's a good thing we're doing this, at least I think so."

"And Taylor? What's she going to think if she found out we were with each other?" I stopped walking and actually looked up at him, but once I did I quickly wished I hadn't. His eyes were like swimming pools that I just wanted to dive into and they were looking back into mine with such interest that I could tell he'd been staring down at me before.