TF2 One Shots

A Drunken Confession (RED Sniper x BLU Scout)

A.n.: Alright, so I MAY have ACCIDENTALLY made this a bit smutty. By a bit, I mean it would get a 7/10 for smuttiness. Oops. I'll put a warning around where it's smutty so everyone is aware of that. Alright, let's do this.

Scout's P.O.V

I couldn't believe that we won today. I mean, of course we would win! The BLU team has me. How could we not win?

It's our first win in about a month. Now, I know that I said that with me on the BLU team, we would win every match, right? Well, I haven't been on my "A" game recently. I've been on my "B" game. And it's all because of that stupid RED Sniper.

Everytime I try to round a corner, that old fart gets me! Like, I can't even run back to spawn to change my weapons without having my head blown off! What type of crap is that?

Anyway, I'm digressing. Shit, did I use that word right? Oh hell yeah, I did! Of course I did! I'm the Scout! I'm freaking amazing!

*Ahem* Anyways, we finally won in a long time. The team decided to do a little party. And by little, I mean a week long party. Surprisingly, we kept winning after that day.

Saturday was our last day of partying. I decided to treat myself to some beer. I mean, Demo's Skrumpy was alright, but I wanted to get flat-out drunk. I snuck out of the BLU base in a black jacket while everyone was in the kitchen enjoying the dinner Pyro cooked. I got to admit, for a maniac, they make a mean steak.

I ran once I got outside. Our base was closer to Teufort than the RED base, so I got there in about 20 minutes. I stood near the city gates panting. Hey, what can I say? Even gods get tired.

I'm glad that I brought the jacket. It's as cold as Spy's heart right now. After I got myself together, I decided to go to the only bar in Teufort. Once I walked in, everyone looked at me. Some glanced at me, others checked me out, but most full-on started at me. Did I really look that handsome?

I nodded at a few of them, even though I never met them in my life. I strutted toward the bar.

"Ay, bartender. Can I getta lil' service here?" The bartender rolled their eyes at me and started to walk over to where I was. Rude.

"What do you want to drink, sir?"

"I wanna try soma your finest beer, sir."

The bartender raised his eyebrow, looking me up and down. "Aren't you a little young to be here, sir?" he questioned, smirking.

"How freakin' dare you? I'm old enough to be here!" I retort.

"Can you show me some ID then, sir?"

Aw, crap.

I started to look in my pockets, but I found nothing. Fuck me.

"He's laegul. Oi cahn vouch faw him."

I turned around and saw Sniper behind me. He was wearing a white shirt with a tie, and was carrying a saxophone. The bartender and I raised our eyebrows at him, but all he did was smirk.

"Alright, Mundy. I trust ya. I'll get your beer sir," the bartender said while walking away.

I stood right in front of Sniper and glared at him. "Alright, so why ta hell are ya here, ya stupid lona?"

Sniper smirked more when I said that. "Poike daown, ya bloody brat. Oi just haelped ya roigh' naow."

I scoffed at him and sat down at the bar. He sat down next to me, holding his sax in-between his lap. The bartender came back with two glasses of beer.