Heart Like Yours \\ M. Lucic

Chapter 4

Brad Marchand amuses me so much

it's like

he's a grown man but he's like a 15 year old boy

like does anyone remember when he got the pregame soccer ball stuck in the rafters in Montreal and

he literally stole a ladder

he found a ladder and climbed into the rafters

to get a soccer ball

Damn I love him. I love this team. I really do.

😂 enjoy teddy bears🐻

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Milan drove, mostly because he wanted to. Plus he drove a lot faster than I did. He turned on the radio, and The Fray was on. Look After You was playing. I liked this song I guess, but my favorite that I had heard was You Found Me.

If I don't say this now I will surely break

As I'm leaving the one I wanna take

Forget the urgency but hurry up and wait

My heart has started to separate

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

Oh oh oh, oh oh

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

I'll look after you

There now, steady love, so few come and don't go

Will you, won't you be the one I'll always know?

When I'm losing my control the city spins around

You're the only one who knows how to slow it down

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

Oh oh oh, oh oh

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

I'll look after you and I'll look after you

If ever there was a doubt

My love, she leans into me

This most assuredly counts

She says 'most assuredly'

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

I'll look after you, after you

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

Oh oh oh, oh oh

It's always have and never hold

You've begun to feel like home, yeah

What's mine is yours to leave or take

What's mine is yours to make your own

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

Oh oh oh, oh oh

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

Oh oh oh, oh oh

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

Oh oh oh, oh oh

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, be my baby

Oh oh oh, oh oh

"You know how you said Fix You took you back to that night?" Milan asked, turning off the radio. We were in complete silence.

" 'Course I do," I mumbled. I felt my throat start to constrict and my heart start to quicken. I looked out the window. Just thinking about it made me feel like shit.

"You told me that in a sick way, it was binding you to your past," he said.

"Yes, Milan. Of course I know what I fucking said," I snapped. His shoulders fell. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you."

"Well...if that's binding you to your past, Fix You, I mean, I think you should have a song that represents you moving forward in life. And I think that it should be our song."

"What?" I asked.

"I think Look After You should be our song. Because I'm gonna look after you for the rest of your life. To keep you from getting hurt." He took a deep breath. "Why should that song bind you to your past? You have so much to look forward to in life, and you shouldn't be at the mercy of a song. So...damn, does this even make any sense?" he sighed. He stopped the car. I hadn't even noticed we were home. Neither of us got out, even though we unbuckled.

"You want Look After You to be our song?" I asked slowly. He shut off the engine, and we both got out. He went to the door and unlocked it.

"Yeah. 'Cause I always wanna be able to look after you. To make sure you're safe."

And as soon as the words rolled off his lips, I started to cry. I ran inside before he could see me cry. I couldn't. I didn't deserve him. He was such a caring and genuine person. I hated, absolutely hated, that I couldn't do anything for Milan. All I could do for him was tell him I love him. And for me, it wasn't enough just to say it. There are about 1,013,913 words in the English language, and I couldn't string any of them together to express how much I deeply cared for him. He meant so much to me, and literally almost every moment of every day I just wanted to tell him that and I just couldn't bring myself to.

"Dumbass, Dax," I muttered. "A fucking dumbass."

I really needed to stop cussing. I spent so much time with those damn hockey players. But as I went into the bathroom and undressed immediately, then getting into the shower, it faded from my mind.

"Dax? Babe! I...did I say something?" Milan sighed. The hot water washed away my tears. Well, not exactly. But it did hide them.

"I'm in the shower, Milan," I huffed exasperatedly. "What do you want?"

"Dax, are you are ok? What was that back there?"

"I'll talk to you when I get out," I sighed.

"Well, we could always conserve water and shower together," he suggested.

"Suggest that again and I'll break your nose," I said, grabbing the shampoo.

"Please, we both know you love the kinky side of me." He was smirking, and we both knew it.

"Just go get me a fresh t-shirt and underwear," I rolled my eyes, rubbing the shampoo into my hair. He left, and I heard him come back about a minute later with my clothes.

"Thanks."

"Yup."

He left. I grabbed my body wash and scrubbed myself down. Then I washed my face and rinsed my hair out. I turned off the shower and grabbed my towel from right outside the shower curtain. That was a habit of mine, grabbing my towel before I got out. I wrapped it around my body in a toga-like fashion. I stepped out of the shower, and my 6'4", 220 lbs. boyfriend was leaning against the counter of the sink, a towel wrapped low around his waist.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" I yelped.

"Please, I've seen you in less," he rolled his eyes.

"That's not the point, Milan," I sighed, rubbing my head.

"Babe, why'd you freak out?" he slightly frowned. "All I said was that I wanted to protect you. I didn't think it was a big deal."

And it shouldn't have been, but with the future being brought up and with Charlie being brought up, I was already that much closer to breaking.