easy | e. dolan

18. - bye/hey

did she hurt me?

of course she hurt me. that's all she could ever do to me. seeing her today made me happy. but then hearing that she only wanted to talk tore my heart in half.

but she didn't necessarily talk to me, cody did. eh, cody didn't actually talk to me either, he just closed the door and started punching me.

oh well, good thing my princess walked in. it's not like he hurt me. it didn't hurt.

his pain was nothing compared to what she has done to me. and let me tell you this: mental pain hurts more than physical pain.

"well, what can you do?" i asked. i licked my swollen, pink lips.

"nothing with you." her eyes glossed, and i saw that they were turning a light blue.

when she cries, her eyes turn a dark grey. she probably hasn't cried in ages.
"no, baby. don't cry."

she roughly wiped her eyes making them become a light red.

"i have to go, ethan. m-my-" she stopped herself, "cody is waiting for me."

"don't do this. please." i felt a tear drop down my cheek.

"goodbye, ethan. i always will, i always have, and could never stop loving you. you were the one, ethan. you were the one i fell in love with when i first saw you. you give me chills. you taught me how to love. you made my stupid ass fall like an idiot. you are the love of my life. you'll always be. i am madly head over heels in love with you, ethan grant dolan. now, i'm pretty sure you'll fall in love with nicola, or you probably already have. but just," she wipes her left eye again, "know that no matter what pain you put me through, i loved you through it. believe me, i craved your lips, your hugs, your smiles, your protective eyes, and i even craved your touch. just you in general, even.
this whole time. so i have one favor for you...

"please, don't forget me."
she exited the bathroom, leaving me sitting on the sink, hopeless.
—
again, i don't know how long it's been since she told me that she loved me in the bathroom. i lost count to the point where now, i don't even care.

so you're probably going to call me a dick for not saying anything. well, i didn't have to. she knows that i love her: what's the point?

so nicola was upset that i didn't go to her prom for college. she was so upset that she ended things.

but i'm honestly not complaining. these last couple of weeks were really fun with grayson. we caught up and hangout everyday.

but when i go to sleep i think of her. i think of aviana. and i wonder what would've happened if ian and james didn't make that incident happen that day. because that incident led me to yelling at her.

so you can't blame me. i was frustrated and i just wanted to protect my precious baby.

oh, and grayson and i are meeting up with cameron at a restaurant and i'm really anxious to see my sister.

i hadn't seen her since tatum came over to the apartment, because she left to jersey then next day.

i showered and did my hair, put on deodorant and cologne, and changed into a casual outfit: light blue jeans that rolled up just above my ankles, all white converse high tops, and a white t shirt.