A book in which I rant about things on Wattpad and in everyday life. I have alot of things to vent about so why not vent my frustrations to a bunch of strangers on Wattpad?
Enjoy my extra-ness.
🎵Prepare to meet your end. Just looked you up on have facebook, you have zero friends. This guys a loser, yo, he aint even kissed a girl. He write her love letters, I buy her ice and pear-"🎵
Kay, let me stop. If yall know where thats from ^^^ we best friends. Hi, best friend.
*clears throat* Let the cringe commense...
1. I was that one kid that played with their crayons and made them date. I remember the exact colors, too. Yellow dated blue. Red dated green. And green cheated on Red with Pink.
Sigh... I was a weird kid. I still am.
2. I don't know how to ride a bike. I just learned how to swim last year. And I can barely do it.
3. I had imaginary friends until I was eleven. Chuck and Bonnie...
Ah, the good ol' days :"")
4. I was was in the middle of this class, with two people seated beside me, and a booger legit fell out of my nose and onto the book in my lap. I had to stealthily swipe that thing off before someone saw. Til this day I dont know if somebody caught me or not.
5. I've never told anyone this before... not even Mac v.v
It's so embarrasing. The worst one, yet...
I had a dream where I was dating Jake Paul.
There.
I said it.
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*dunks my own head into the toilet*
6. In first grade, my teacher brought me into a closet that was inside the classroom and beat me with a ruler. I exited crying, with snot running down my face and the class just stared at me. All because I forgot to put everyone's backpacks up bevause I was on backpack duty.
Looking back, that teacher needs to be fired o.o
7. I was at this event with this ministry and there was a kid that I didn't really talk to that much and its always kind of awkward between us. The moment I decide to be social and spark up a conversation, he and his friend walked past me like I didn't even exist. And I was just left standing there, feeling like a doofus.
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8. I went to a parade with my best friend when I was like nine. We were just chilling, clapping as the floats went by and her mom pulled me to the side, grabbed a tissue, stuck it in my ear, pulled out a huge glob of earwax and showed it to me.
I felt like dying right then and there. LIKE WHAT ELSE DO YOU DO IN THAT SITUATION?! She was probably thinking I was some dirt doblin who didn't care about my hygiene.
9. When I was twelve, I finally learned how to ride a scooter. Right when I became semi-descent, I thought it was a good idea to go down this huge asphault ramp.
I ended up SKYROCKETING off the scooter once I reached the bottom. I swear I saw my life flash before my eyes.
I started crying because I got scraped up really bad and I was bleeding like a maniac. My brother had to walk me home with toilet paper from a port-a-potty wrapped around my arms.
10. In the third grade I tried to forge my dad's signature, once. And by tried, I just wrote his name in cursive.
Smh.
After school, the teacher called me over to her desk with a copy of my mom and dads signature in front of her.
She was like:
"Tori, did you forge your dad's signature?"
Me: "No..."
Her: "If you tell the truth, I won't call your mom. (my mom worked at the school I went to) You just have to be honest."
Me: "I didn't... I didn't do it."
Her: "*sigh* *dials my moms number*"
Long story short, my mom came in, she told her what happened and I got a whooping that day :)
______
Welp. There you have it :}
*slowly backs away before sprinting to the forest, never to be seen again*
