stoical - l.h.

eight

**just a slight warning, lavender has a panic attack in this chapter that may be a little intense to read, i'm not really sure, but if you skip the details of it and just go to afterwards, you should be fine and not confused! if you are confused after having skipped it just comment your question and i'll clarify. enjoy!

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Being in the Hoods' home after a long day at school gives me the best feeling I have ever felt in my life. I feel so calm as soon as I pass through the front door and let out a relieved sigh at the sight of the somewhat familiar surroundings. Familiar in a way that's comforting more than something I'm already used to. When I spot Hiro approaching the front door quickly, I actually smile a little and watch as he heads straight for Calum. He lets out a string out strange noises as he does so, clearly not happy with the fact that Calum was gone for the whole day.

"Hey, little buddy," Calum says. I see him smile and kneel, giving the cat the attention he wants. When he starts laughing, I do, too, though I don't know why either of us are laughing at the cat, who hasn't done anything that funny.

I walk away after that, wanting desperately to be alone for at least a little while. Though I'm grateful for all Calum has said and done today, I need to be alone. I head up the stairs without doing anything else and head straight for the bed. Once I'm in the room,I drop my raggedy backpack to the ground randomly and lay onto the bed, letting it envelop me in its comfort. It's still a mess from this morning since I didn't make it, but it somehow makes it feel even more comfortable to me. I sigh against the pillow and grab a blanket, pulling it up to my shoulders. I feel a smile make its way onto my lips. I can't tell if this is true happiness, but I know I am content like this. I no longer feel especially unsafe, now that I'm away from that school filled with all of those overwhelming teachers and classes. I'm here, in the Hoods' home, where the atmosphere is calm and collected and good.

I lay there for quite a while, or so it feels like. I haven't even taken off my shoes yet, but I feel so mentally and physically exhausted that I can't seem to care at the moment. Shutting my eyes is a huge mistake, but I do, and I don't know how long it is before I'm startling awake to the tune of a knock on my door.

I pick up my head from the bed and stare at my door confusedly. "Come in?"

The white door opens slowly, almost cautiously, and Calum pokes his head in slightly. His eyebrows are raised, as if he's nervous to come in. When he sees I'm not indecent or whatever, he relaxes and opens the door wider.

"Oh, were you napping?" he asks. "I'm sorry, it's not important. I'll let you get back to it."

I shake my head and sit up further, finally kicking off my dirty shoes. "No, that's okay. It was an accidental nap."

Calum laughs knowingly and comes further into the room. I notice he's changed from jeans to sweatpants, and only wears white socks on his feet. He looks comfy, and I'm tempted to put on my sweatpants too.

"I just wanted to know if you wanted some food or anything," he says, shrugging. "I'm really in the mood for pancakes, but I don't want to make them unless I'm sharing. Since, you know, it makes a lot."

"Pancakes sound great," I say. I'm not very hungry, but I've barely eaten all day. I'm sure it's just the tiredness that's making me not feel the hunger. But, really, a few pancakes couldn't hurt anyway.

"Great. Well, come down when you want. I'm going to start them now." Calum smiles and exits the room, making sure to shut the door as he walks out.

It's something little like that which is really making the difference here. I've had people be decent with me, have manners with me, but it could still be those same people who discipline me harshly or don't really ever care about me. Calum making sure I eat enough, even shutting the door on the way out of the room to give me my privacy...it has to be some sort of dream. I just don't believe this.