Smile for me(Laurinah Fanfic)

Chapter 15{I Want You to Stay}

*****Lauren's POV****

Right before I pulled the trigger, I heard Dinah yell out. "LAUREN! PLEASE OPEN UP BABY! DON'T DO THIS! I LOVE YOU! I CAN'T LOSE YOU!" I couldn't believe her though, I just couldn't. I had heard that before, and that guy broke my heart. He took my virginity and he left me, and I was heart broken. I wasn't going to let that happen to me again, ever. "I'm sorry" I whispered, feeling a lone tear stream down my face.

I prayed in my head that I wouldn't go to hell, and I then I fired the gun to my forehead. As I fired, the door bust open and caused me to shoot a shot in the wrong direction. The bullet ricocheted off the bathroom floor and out the window. I tried to shoot again, but then I felt a strong hand grab me and fight the gun out of my hand.

"NO! GIVE IT TO ME! GIVE IT BACK!" I screamed, trying to grab the gun from the person. I jumped on their back and tried to reach around them and grab the gun. I had to do this, and nothing was gonna stop me. I hit them in the head repeatedly, causing us to fall forward and then gun to fire. I heard the person groan in pain. And that's when I realized who it was....Dinah.

She turned us around so she was on top, and then yanked the gun out of my hand. I tried to leap forward, but she held threw the gun to the ground and held me to her chest. "No! Let me go! L-let m-m-me go" I cried into her chest, trying to push her away. "Shhh baby, let me hold you" she said, putting her head into my neck. I immediately stopped struggling when I felt her crying into my shoulder. And then it hit me......I meant something to her.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and held her close to me, feeling my heart swell. "Don't you ever scare me like that again, okay? Do you hear me" she said, holding me even tighter. I could feel her heart thumping loudly against mine, and I knew that she was scared......scared that she might lose me. "I'm sorry Dinah, I'm so sorry" I said, and then I felt more arms wrap around us. I already knew it was ally and Mila.

"I'm so sorry guys" I sobbed, crying harder into Dinah. "You scared the fucking hell out of me Lauren! Why would you even do something like that?" Ally yelled, and I was shocked. Ally never yelled, and her cursing was more rare then a new song from Solange. "I'm sorry Ally, I'm sorry Mila. I don't know what came over me" I said. Dinah put her hand on the back of my head and ran her fingers through my hair, calming me down.

We were all just holding each other on the bathroom floor, when I felt a warm liquid streaming down my chest. I nudged Dinah back slowly, only to see that her shoulder was bleeding. "Dinah, your bleeding" I said, and then she put her hand on it and saw the blood. "Oh, I guess that happened when you dropped me" she said, chuckling towards the end. I looked towards Ally and Camila, "Can you get me ice and a wet cloth, and something to wrap it and stop the bleeding?" They nodded and then we went to work on Dinah's shoulder.

I made her sit on my bed and take off her shirt, and what I saw was very nice to look at. She was fit before, but now her muscles were more toned and well-defined. She had a solid 6-pack and strong arms, and it could make anyone's mouth water. I was trying to keep my cool, but it was such a challenge.

I was rubbing her shoulder and she was wincing, "I'm sorry Dinah, for everything". She didn't look up at me, she just stared at her shoes. I was trying to figure out what was going on in her mind, but I wasn't a mind reader. "Dinah, please say something?" I said, wrapping up her shoulder and upper body. "Why Lauren?" she said. "Why what?"

"Why would you put your self in danger like that? People care about you Lo?" she said. "I don't know Dinah" I said, hanging my head in shame. "People love you. Ally loves you, Camila loves you, Normani, Arin, your parents, your siblings. Fuck it, I love you. And if ally didn't call me I would've lost you. What would I have done if I lost you? you are the first person I've ever loved. I would've died on the inside if you left me".

By the end she was crying, and I couldn't help but cry too. I had put her through so much, I hurt her too. I moved forward and wrapped my arms around Dinah's neck, pulling her closer to me. She wrapped her arms around my waist and sobbed, "I love you so much Lauren". I stroked her head and kissed her temple, letting my lips linger. "Why didn't you tell someone you were feeling like this?" she said.

"After we broke up, I fell into a deep depression. Life started to go downhill. I got fired from my job, and I had to start working as a stripper or we'd be at on the street. I felt so disgusting doing that job, it made me feel like less of a person. I was abused by my boss, harassed by customers....it was all too much. And the fact that I couldn't come to you for help made it even worse. I felt alone, and I walked around with the aching pain in my heart. It was too much for me to handle alone, and I decided I just needed to end it all. I knew I couldn't tell ally or Camila".

Dinah grabbed my hand, "Why couldn't you tell them?" "Back before we met and I left Florida, I used to self harm. Ally and Camila had just started dating, and they caught my cutting one day. They tried to send me somewhere and I ran away for a week. Someone at school found out what happened when I returned, and my life was a living hell. And it was even worst after Keaton told everyone he banged me. I wanted to die, so I tried to OD on pills. Ally found me and made me throw them up".

I put my head in my hands, crying silently. I was so ashamed of myself, and I'm sure Dinah was too. but what she told me next shocked me. "I use to cut too" she whispered, grabbing my hand. "what?" "I was depressed because I liked this girl and it was a sin to be lesbian, so I cut to get rid of the pain" she said, rubbing circles on my hands. "Everyone has tough times in life Lauren, but we need to push through these together. Talk to someone if you need help. Although we aren't together, your still my friend. Call me, okay?"

I nodded and then Dinah got up, grabbing her coat. "wait, where are you going?" I asked, grabbing her wrist. "Home Lauren, I'm glad you're okay. But I need to get home and check on what they're saying about me on Hollywood Access. I ran out in the middle of in interview". I held her wrist tighter, and then pulled her into a hug. "Don't leave me" I whispered, "I want you to stay".