So, There's an Assassin in My Bed - Kyman (Kyle x Cartman)

kyle

[kyle's point of view]

"you do realise that we nearly got caught the other day?" my roommate and dearest best friend states. i glance over at the black haired boy and roll my eyes.

"since when did you care?" i mumble, and continue to play GTA.

stan literally never cares about getting caught, so why is he worrying now? i get that it was definitely close, but wow, he's being dramatic.

"we should go to a club." stan says.

i snort, "yeah, that went well last time- RUN FRANKLIN YOU DUMBASS!- you nearly got bashed in a bar fight." i roll my eyes.

he puts his hands up in surrender, "hey, he said my girlfriend looked hot, and he'd tap that, like you wouldn't freak out if someone hit on your man."

yes, you heard right, i'm a homosexual. but like, homosexual out of business.

"pleaseeeee, a new club just opened up!" stan whines, suddenly the controller is ripped from my grip.

"hey! what the fuc-" i start but a hand slaps over my mouth, obviously stan is responsible, he gives me a cheeky grin.

"i'll give you back your controller if you promise to got out tonight."

i lick his palm, stan screeches and retreats his arm back to his side. "ew!"

"fine, whatever. but if you get into another fight, i'm kicking you out." i mumble. what an asshole.

.~.

the music is pumping around me which is causing a slight headache to occur, i made stan to promise not to abandon me - yeah he broke that real quick. i make my way through the sweaty bodies and end up at the bar, a couple of people are seated there but not too many.

i take a seat, as the bartender approach's me, "can i get you anything?" a tall-ish girl with bright red hair asks.

"an aspirin?" i ask, half sarcasm; half truth.

she lets out a snort, "a friend drag you here?" she frowns at the stain on the bar counter and scrubs it with a rag.

"yep, everyone here is either completely wasted or awkwardly sitting in the corner, i prefer the latter to be honest." i say.

"well, you've definitely got someone's attention," she nods to the opposite side of the room.

i turn my attention to that direction, and she wasn't lying, there stood a boy about three inches taller than me, he has feathery brown hair and even in the dark lighting i can see the sapphire blue eyes that are staring directly at me.

"you should go over there." i turn my attention back to the girl.

"no way dude! i'm too awkward." i mumble the last part. m

"he'll probably follow you home if you don't go over there."

"okay! i'll do it!"

"well, i have drinks to serve, hopefully i'll see you soon."

"thank you..." i pause for her name.

"it's rebecca, but i go by red."

"i'm kyle." i smile politely.

"go get your man."

i snort, i'm gonna get laid.

A/N: HEYYYY, THIS IS REALLY LAME BUT IDCCCCCC, also it's unedited so if there's mistakes sorrryyyy

THANK YOU FOR THE VOTESSS 🖤🖤🖤🖤

UNTIL NEXT TIME X X