So, There's an Assassin in My Bed - Kyman (Kyle x Cartman)

eric

[eric's point of view]

"you what?!"

"kinda forgot you were living with us, and kinda told an old friend of mine that his assassin could stay at our house to lay low, and now you kinda have to share a bed with him, heh." kenny smiles.

i rub my temple with my index finger, "you're crazy."

he shrugs, "yeah, true."

"so, i have to share my bed and room with a complete stranger?"

i had been living with kenny and butters for just over a month now, it was definitely hard to move out (completely) from my mothers home, but also a sigh of relief that i didn't have to deal with that selfish bitch anymore.

butters, most times, helped me through the rough nights that are filled with tears. even if he was an asshole at times, he was truly a good friend.

and now i have to deal with an assassin in my bed?

"yeah, pretty much." kenny half smiles.

"fan-fucking-tastic," i mumble. "i need to go on a walk."

-

my walk was uneventful to say the least, i was mostly overthinking, about the red headed boy who gives me a strange feeling in my chest. i was 99% sure he blocked my number, so my next quest was to find him again.

as i approached my apartment building i see a black van parked out front, a frown crosses my face, did kenny say he was moving in today?

i run (or sorta do a weird half jog thing) upstairs until i hit our apartment door, it was unlocked and opened. i walk inside, "kenny?!" i shut the door behind me.

"fatass!" he calls back, assuming he was in the kitchen, i walk there. and i was shocked to say the least, leaning against the counter was the boy that made my heart skip a beat.

kyle scoffs, "no fucking way."

kenny looks between both of us, confusion clouding his face.

"hey, sexy kyle." i wink, and if looks could kill, kyle would have me chopped up into little bits on the ground.

suddenly kenny gasps, we both snap our attention to him. "you hooked up with kyle?"

before i could reply, kyle beat me to it. "sadly, yes. okay, i was drunk and lonely."

anger boils inside me, how dare that very attractive boy criticise me?!

"well, you're a fucking jew!"

kyle shoots me a look, "how did you know i was jewish?"

"i mean, look at you, with that shitty innocent act, and stupid pretty face, and stupid sexy body and you're stupid beautiful-"

a cough cuts me off, kenny is smirking at me, then suddenly bursts into laughter. while kyle is a bright shade of red. "fuck." i mutter. "i was joking! shut the fuck up kenny!"

kyle is now smirking at me, "my stupid pretty face, heh?"

"shut up, jewboy."

i leave the kitchen, embarrassed, making sure to slam the door on the way out.

stupid pretty face.

A/N: ajjsnsjs idk if this story makes sense but i'm trying so just like, go with it ;)))))

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bye bye bye xx