Hellfire • L.A.

My Own Self

I sat in Hanje's office while she poked and prodded at Eren's skin. In some way, I felt bad for the boy. No one seemed to look at him as a human anymore. Whenever I was with him all I could hear were people whispering things like "titan boy" and fears that he would turn suddenly and kill us all.

"It's extraordinary, Eren!" Hanje sighs as she walks away from the boy and back to her desk. "You're skin isn't as rough or course as titan skin in your human form. If only Erwin would allow us to get you to turn so that I could see if it was the same." She frowns and writes something down on a notepad.

"With all due respect Captain, I'm glad that he won't let us." Eren looks at the ground. "If what they say is true and I really did try to kill Mikasa back in Trost, then maybe I should only be used as a weapon."

"You're not a monster Eren." I scoff at the young boy. His head perks up, big green eyes gleaming at me.

"You're not a weapon either." Hanje puts the notebook down and frowns at the boy.

He sighs. "I just feel...lost."

I push myself off of my seat on Hanje's desk and walk over to where Eren is sitting. Gently I pat his shoulder. "That's understandable. We all are. Right now, though, just know that you belong here. You're not a monster, or a weapon, no matter what anyone tells you. You're just a kid."

Eren gives me a small, hopeful smile and I feel good. The words I said to him were words I wished someone would have told me long ago. 

A cough from the doorway causes me to tear my attention away from the young boy. Levi stands with there with his normal frown and cold eyes. "As touching as this is, it's time for Jaeger to get out. The squad leaders have a meeting with Erwin in five minutes."

Eren stands up quickly and salutes Levi. "Y-yes sir!" He rushes out and past Levi down the hallway.

Hanje shuffles the papers in her hands. "I'll be there in a minute you guys go on."

"I didn't offer to walk with you two, I just came to remind you." Levi huffs out, crossing his arms.

"That's oddly thoughtful of you, captain." I remark as I walk towards the door. "See you in a bit Hanje."

Surprisingly Levi follows me out of Hanje's office. His footsteps are almost silet next to mine, which is impressive considering I spent most of my teenage years learning how to sneak around homes at night.

"Why are you so nice to Jaeger?" He questions suddenly.

"He's scared. He needs someone to tell him it's gong to be okay." I shrug.

Levi hums. "I wasn't sure if you just had a thing for younger boys or not."

My jaw drops as a strangled laugh escapes my throat. I turn to look at Levi. The corners of his lips are barely turned up. "Was that you're attempt at making a joke."

"Attempt? I would say I succeeded." 

Rolling my eyes I snort. "Well played, Levi. Well played."

There's a beat of silence between us. A few cadets pass by as we're walking, and they salute us. I wave them off as usual, but Levi just frowns and dismisses them.

"You know," I clear my throat, "most men thrive off of power. What's your deal?"

"They only respect me out of fear. What's the use in that?"

I hum and shake my head. "That's where you're wrong."

Levi turns his head and narrows his eyes at me. "What? You think I'm not intimidating?"