strawberries (yoonmin) #WATTYS2019

XIX

Friday, February 9th

Jimin was sitting in his room, watching some anime on his laptop in his bed. His cat, Weasley, was curled into his side as he gently pet his head. It was finally the weekend and he was more than excited to spend it locked up in his room.

But his peaceful evening was interrupted by his phone going off. A specific text ringtone that made him get up without even having to look at his phone. He patted Weasley's head and climbed out of bed, closing his laptop as he went. His eyes glanced down to the single layer of clothes he was wearing and shrugged as he walked out.

He walked through the empty lounge room and to the elevator on the left side of the room, the private elevator for residents. Jimin picked at his dry nails with boredom as he waited for the doors to open, he had to go to the 15th floor from the 6th.

Today was Friday, which is his third day of the week that he has to go see Miss Luna. It's been almost eight years since he's had to do this kind of meeting thing. He's used to it really.

The doors opened and he walked through the hallway full of closed doors till he reached the door with the most papers shoved into its mailbox. He smiled at it before he pulled the messy stack out and walked into the office.

A woman with long black hair and thin red glasses looked up from her computer and smiled brightly at the boy's entrance. She waved happily and shoved all the papers over on her desk and tapped the empty space with her hands.

Jimin smiled back and set the new papers on the edge of the desk, sitting in the comfy chair in front of her desk.

'How have you been?' She asked in sign to the younger.

It's been a while since Jimin has used his voice. He doesn't like it, hates to hear it even in his head. When he arrived at the orphanage, he asked Miss Luna if he had to speak and she told him no. So, he hasn't spoken since, not to anyone else at least.

'I've been okay, Yoongi hyung is still around.'

They learned sign together when Jimin was eight and although she seems to be the only person who knows it besides him, it's still his favorite way to communicate.

'That's great! I'm so happy you've got a friend,' She smiled warmly.

'He's really...  special to me.'

'Of course he is! How did the whole girl issue go for him?'

'Terribly. He cried and everything,' Jimin was sad just thinking about the memory of two days ago.

'Oh no, did you see him crying?'

'Yeah actually. I gave him a hug.'

'Jimin that's amazing!' She jumped up and grabbed his hands from across the table.

They both smiled at each other, enjoying the obvious growth in sociability that Jimin is having. Jimin pulled his hands away and began to sign again.

'He makes my heart race,' Jimin's cheeks started to turn into a soft pink.

'Yeah?'

"Yeah. And he makes me happy every day, even when I don't want to be.'

'Maybe this boy is a little more important than you think," A cheeky smile was spreading on her face.

'Of course he's important. He's my best friend.'

'I'm sure he is Jimin.'

'I wish he didn't make me so nervous,' Jimin pouted.

'Honey, everyone makes you nervous. It's okay that he might shake you up a bit. Does he know about all this?' She asked and did a small circle with her hand to insinuate the building.

Jimin just shook his head and slowly his head hung low. He would never tell Yoongi about is past or why he's in an orphanage. He might not even tell him that he lives in an orphanage at all.

Miss Luna tapped his shoulder, 'That's okay! It's okay Jimin,' she smiled sweetly.

They changed the subject and Jimin talked about school work and how he's been eating. Miss Luna refrains herself from calling the boy out on his obvious lying but she knows the younger doesn't need any more stress. She'll just have to increase the vitamins in his weekly shot.

They talked for two hours until Mrs. Luna deemed it was time for the boy to get ready for sleep. So they shared a hug before he left and now Jimin was standing alone in the elevator. He held on to his shirt and fiddled with the hem till the doors opened again.

He walked straight to his room, avoiding the two other boys that were relaxing on the couch in the lounge. He knows everyone's name on the floor but he's not friends with any of them. Jimin slammed his door behind him and closed the blinds in his room.

He walked into his bathroom and began to take off his clothes. Usually getting undressed takes Jimin quite some time, considering he constantly wears at least two layers of clothes, winter or summer.

His sweatpants and long sleeve shirt were thrown into the almost full dirty clothes basket and he turned on the shower, steam slowly filling up the room. He turned around to look at his phone that he had set on the counter when he looked up and saw his body in the mirror.

For as long as Jimin has lived in this dorm room, his mirror was halfway covered with a black cloth. The cloth kept him from seeing anything from his shoulders down. He refuses to see his body and the cloth had become a safety blanket.

But for some reason, the cloth had fallen.

It's like it fell off the pins, maybe they came out of the wall. One side was still attached to the wall but the other side was laying down in the sink, revealing the entire mirror.

His pale skin contrasted so harshly against the light, casting deep shadows in the dips of his ribs. His hip bones stuck out from his sides and the skin looked tight across his whole torso. The way his collarbones looked like they were ready to jump out of his chest made him want to throw up.

He turned ever so slightly, looking at the way his skin barely moved and tears flooded his eyes when he could see every bump in his spine. His shoulder bones looked contorted and harsh from the twist.

Suddenly he was on the floor, on his knees with his hands over his head gripping onto his hair. He didn't want to look so ugly, yet he knew that this is what would've been wanted. This is what they would've wanted.

So he laid there, on the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, and cried. Making noise immediately disturbs his neighbors because he never makes any. And he sobbed so loudly that the dorm room member next to him actually had to break into his room and make sure he wasn't dying.

He was dying, just on the inside.

____

whoop i love writing this book i swear

edited by Sakurachiru an angel