Carla's Story ( Katy Perry Fan Fic )

Chapter 33

(Carla's POV)

I woke up to see Katy getting dressed, I immediately closed my eyes. I kept I eyes closed till I felt the bed move then I opened them.

"Hey babe did you sleep good?" she asked laying next to me

"Ya" I got up and went I to the bathroom. after I did what I needed I went out grabbed my dress and leggings and went back in to change. When I came out Katy wasn't laying there anymore. I quietly walked down the hall to the kitchen where I heard Katy and Shannon talking.

"Ya it seems good now I just hope it stays that way so I can tell her" Katy said

"How do you think she will take it?" Shannon asked

"I don't know I just don't want her to be all clinging to me so I can have time for both of them" Kate said

Clinging to her? does that mean she thinks I'm clingy to her? and she doesn't want me by her? who's coming anyway that she would need time for both?

"Just make sure you do make time for Carla" Shannon said in a serious tone

"I'll try it's just so hard 'cause if I'm not with her then most likely she's doing something she shouldn't or she will feel left out or something and it seems like she always wants to be around me and sometimes I just need some me time you know?" Katy said making me regret staying with her yesterday

"Ya I know what you mean but just try" Shannon said

"I will I will but she's hopeless" Katy said making tears blur my eyesight

"Maybe" Shannon said

"She had a spark when I adopted her but then the spark faded now she's just a used firework" Katy said making the tears fall. I ran back into the room and curled I to a ball in the bathroom floor.

I'm useless. I always thought Katy could save me but now I see she thinking I'm hopeless. she songs about everyone being a firework and then tells her friend I'm not, she's always right on that. yesterday night I thought we were going to be ok but now I know we will never be ok, we will never be a family or even friends, I will never be loved.I know now that she talks about me to Shannon probably more often the I thought. I know I'm dying and now I don't think I will survive or even that I care to. I understand that the voices I've started to hear in my head are my only friends, my only way out. and that's not bad. I just can't understand why Katy continues to save me when she seems to not even want me in her life like I'm a pet she has to feed and take care of or something.

"Baby you ok? you've been in there for the longest time" Katy asked knocking on the bathroom door I had locked. I didn't answer. I looked around for a razor and found Katy's on the shower shelf. I grabbed it, rolled up my leggings and cut over and over and over till my legs were covered in blood, dark red blood.

"Hey did you fall asleep?" Katy asked followed by a giggle. she probably wishes I fell asleep in the bath and drown.

I stopped cutting for a few minuets to let the pain seep in. I grabbed the razor again and started to cut, again. this time was different I felt the pain but it felt better then it ever did before.

"Hey are you ok?" I barely heard Katy. I realized I was crying, hard.

"Open the door right now" Katy demanded pounding her fists on the door. I cut again and again this time not stopping just going and going.

"SHANNON!" Katy yelled her voice full if worry. I moved to the bathtub, the blood showed more then it did when I was on the floor. now Shannon's going to kill me for making her bathroom messy. I kept cutting as I heard the door handle move but ignored it.