The thorns on a rose (supercorp)

Chapter 15

I saw people running around. Cops, doctors, people. Some of them looked like they were screaming. The cops were shouting to each other. Yet i heard nothing but my own breathing. I saw Alex approaching. She was saying something but I couldn't hear. She came closer. "Supergirl." She said. I didn't answer. She was shaking me. "Supergirl?!" She said again. "Kara?" She said. I looked at her. She pulled me up. "Let me take you home." She said. I had no objections. I couldn't really do anything. As we walked away i had one last look at the bodies. How did i let this happen.

I was laying on my bed. Alex told me to go back to the DEO but i couldn't. I flew away from her. I heard her shout after me but I didn't listen. I didn't know how i felt right now. It was this emptiness. I was staring at the ceiling. I don't know how long i lay there when i heard a knock on the door. I used my x-ray vision. James? I'm not going to open it. The last person i want to speak to is James. I heard the door open. "I know you're home, Kara." James said. "Leave me alone, James!" I said. He came into my room and sat down next to me. "I heard about what happened." He said. I didn't say anything. "You saved Lena, she's fine." He said. "What hero lets 3 people die so she can save one person." I said. "We can't save everyone, Kara." He said. "I should've saved the teenagers. I let my personal feelings get to me." I said. "That's human, Kara." He said. "I'm not a human." I said. "You can't blame yourself for saving the woman you love." He said. I started crying. He pulled me in a hug.

When i woke up, James had left. I had a message from Alex. I told Lena you were out of town when it happened. Sigh. I have to visit her. I'm not sure i could face her right now. Not after what I've done. I know i have to tell her. I can't lie to her any longer. Perhaps it would make her understand more. All the bad things. I did for her. I felt betrayed after the kryptonite and now. I couldn't bare to lose her. I don't know what i would do if my secret would make me lose her.

I flew to her apartment. I was pacing in front of her door. I finally decided to knock on the door. Lena opened the door. I threw myself in her arms. "Are you okay? I heard about what happened." I said. "I'm okay." She said. I held her a little longer but she pulled away. "I brought you some food and i thought we could maybe talk?" I said. "That's really kind of you, Kara, but i'm actually kind of tired." She said. "Oh okay, do you want me to stay until you fall asleep?" I said. "No, it's fine. I would rather be alone right now." She said. "Oh okay." I said. I put the bag on her counter in case she wanted something later. Without saying anything i left Lena's apartment.

I sat down on the couch in my apartment. I had made chocolate milk.  I turned on the tv. "3 teenagers die after Supergirl fails to save them." I turned it off quickly. I knew I couldn't have lived with myself if Lena would've died, but this isn't any better. 3 young people lost their lives because i chose one person over them. I heard my phone buzzing.

Alex:
We have got a robbery for you.

I heard the sirens outside. I felt this pain in my stomach. I felt it buzz again.

Alex:
Where are you? We could use your help.

I didn't stand up. The police should have this handled. They didn't have supergirl before. I knew i had to help them. But for some reason I couldn't get myself to stand up. I was closely listening to what was happening. I heard cops screaming. I heard the people inside who were being held hostage. I could hear the hostage-taker screaming. I heard guns getting loaded. I needed to help them. My legs wouldn't move. "You don't have to do this." I heard a cop say. I was starting to breath heavily. Sweat was forming on my forehead. I heard a loud bang. Screaming continued. I heard him load the gun again. I hold my breath. "Drop the gun sir." A cop said. I heard another loud bang. "We took him down. Moving the hostages outside." I could barely breath by now. My vision was turning black. I felt myself fall.

I slowly opened my eyes. "Kara? Are you awake." I heard Alex say. I started crying. She wrapped me in her arms. "It's not your fault." Alex said. "It is. Their blood is on my hands." I said. "No it's not. You didn't hurt them." Alex said. "What about tonight? Did someone die." I said. "One man." She said. I started sobbing again. "It's going to be okay." She said. "How is any of this okay?" I said. Alex didn't say anything. "Lena doesn't even want to see me anymore." I said. "What happened?" She asked. "She sent me away when i came to see her earlier. I wanted to tell her who i was." I said. "She's probably just upset. Just give her some time." Alex said. "I just feel like everything is falling apart right now." I said. Alex's phone was ringing. "Sorry it's the DEO, i have to go." Alex said. I nodded. "Are you sure you're okay? I can stay?" She said. "No! Just go!" I screamed. "Kara i'll stay." She said. "No leave me alone." I said. I turned my back to her. "Go!" I said again. I heard Alex slowly turn around and leave. When i heard the door close i put my head against a pillow. I screamed. Tears were streaming down my face. How could i let this happen.