3 am Thoughts.

Cry

To say it straight, I really don't.

When my chest is tight and I just want to give up and I'm thinking how worthless and terrible and pathetic I am at night, staring at my ceiling, I can't make myself cry.

I have pent up and tied up anger and sadness and emotions stuck inside me with no way to let them out anymore.

But it seems like when something only a little bad or a little stressful or a little sad happens, it's enough to break the dam preventing my emotions to show. That was when my cat was almost taken away from me.

Then and only then could I cry. Hell, I couldn't even stop.

But now, as I feel stressed and scared, worried and depressed, I also feel nothing. My emotions that seem to flicker every so often from extreme there to empty, are invalidated by the fact that I can't cry to show how truly deep into this hole I am.

All I really feel is invalidated.

I'm sorry for complaining, but the tag says "only read if you want to. " I understand why no one would want to.