Tentacles

28

**TRIGGER WARNING**

I'll post a comment on this paragraph with all of the warnings, for those who are easily offended or sensitive, but to also prevent spoilers. Thank you.

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It's been a week.

She's still gone.

I could feel the alcohol coursing through my system.

It was supposed to relieve the pain. Instead it just made it worse.

I hadn't eaten in a couple of weeks. What's the point.

I giggled to myself. She was gone. And it wasn't even my fault. How fucked up is that?

You know what's the worst part? No one loves me. 

My sister's dead, my father never loved me in the first place. In the eyes of my mother, I'm just a disappointment, a reminder of how fantastic Emily was because I'm just so much worse than what Emily could've ever been. And it's my fault she's dead. 

It's my fault Hailey's gone, too. 

 If Madison had never come over, I would've been okay. She would've been okay.

I hope she's happy.

I stared down at my wrists from the rolled up sweater arms.

I stared at the scars from long ago, from razorblades gliding across my skin like an olympic figure-skater.

What's the point.

I stumbled to the bathroom to get the razorblades.