The Party Girl // Zane Hijazi

Chapter 39: Pass

The year is 2020. I still lived in Los Angeles, but now, in a more modest house with one other person. We have a German Shepherd puppy named Simon. I finished school early and went with a teaching degree in theatre and performing arts. I work at the private performing arts high school ten minutes away from our house, and it's exhausting.

I walked through the front door with swollen feet and a headache. I set my papers on the first flat surface I could find, then shut the door behind me. I saw his messy head of hair sitting at our desk, browsing through his computer. "Hey babe," he turned around slightly, then turning back to his computer. "How was work?"

I collapsed on the couch, kicking my black flats off. "Tiring," I said, throwing my purse to the side. "Where's Simon?" I asked. "Ah, he's out back running around," he said, getting up from the desk. He walked over to me and grabbed my head and kissed my forehead from behind the couch. I took my blazer off, and he walked to the back door located in the kitchen, and let the energetic little puppy in. He bolted toward me, and I was greeted with wet puppy kisses.

"Wanna get some dinner later?" he asked from the kitchen, filling up a glass with water. "Maybe, I have a few papers to grade," I said, tying my hair up. I stood up, grabbing my blazer and purse. I walked down the short hallways to our tiny, melancholic bedroom. I closed the door, threw my bag on the bed, and hung my blazer on the hook on our door. I took my black tank top off, then my black slacks. I pushed open our sliding mirror closet doors, and grabbed a dirty band tee from our pile of dirty clothes. I sat on the bed and held my head in my hands. I felt hopeless. I had a great relationship, and a stable career, but a part of me was missing and I didn't know what.

I glanced over at my bag, and then dug for my phone. Once I found it, I unlocked it and scrolled through my contacts. Once I came to him. I hadn't seen him in months. Ever since the fight. That stupid fucking fight that ended it all. Once that happened, I was emancipated from the group.

I hovered over his number with my thumb. I sat there for a few seconds then locked my phone again. I sighed, then laid back on the bed. I stared at our white popcorn ceiling. I covered my eyes with my hands, and felt my emotions start to stir.

I felt the tears start to stream down my temples. I took deep breaths to try and calm myself down. Every since I started teaching, I couldn't afford my medications, so I had to resort to alcohol, and breathing techniques anytime I felt nervous or depressed. At one point I went as low as bring a flask to work, and taking swings during passing periods.

I uncovered my eyes when I heard a soft knock at the door. "Just a minute," I said composing myself, and wiping my tears away. I pulled myself under the covers, and turned toward the wall. "Come in," I said.

"I'm gonna go see the guys for a bit, if you wanna come-"

"I don't," I replied with a soft chuckle.

"I don't even know why I ask anymore," he laughed. I turned around and looked at him. "Have fun," I said, giving him a soft smile.

He walked to me and gave me a kiss. "I'll probably be back by 8 if you wanna get dinner," he said, smoothing my hair out. "Okay,"

"I love you, Bryn,"

"Love you too, Todd,"

I woke up sweating. "Oh god," I said, disgusted in my subconscious, holding my forehead with my thumb and pointer finger. "Jesus Christ," I said, grabbing my phone off the bedside table. It was 6:34 pm. I slept the day away. Todd and I's conversation was still lingering in my head. He droned on about how empty he was, but I really just called bullshit and cut the conversation short, and went to bed.

I got up and cracked my back. I felt a little nauseous, but not enough to throw up. I was hungry, actually. I was still wearing the clothes I had on earlier. I slipped my jeggings off, and then remembered all my boxes were still in my car. "Ugh," I groaned lazily. I went into our half empty closet, and grabbed a pair of Zane's sweatpants. I slipped them on, and rolled the band to fit my slender figure.

Once I was comfortable, I opened the door, and walked down stairs. Heath, Zane, and Scotty were all gathered around the island in the kitchen drinking beers, and laughing. There was a lull when I walked into the kitchen.

"Hey sleepyhead," Zane said, smiling. "Hi," I said, giving a tiny, tired grin. "Cool bedhead," Heath remarked.

"Ha ha," I said sarcastically, and walking to the fridge. I grabbed a box of leftovers from a few days ago, and opened the styrofoam box. I picked at the four, cold, chicken fingers, and pulled a chunk off and popped it in my mouth.

I walked to the barstools and sat between Heath and Zane. "Cold chicken Bryn?" Zane asked.

"Pregnancy pass," I grumbled, stuffing more food into my mouth.

"Oh yeah- Scott, I'm pregnant," I said nonchalantly. Scotty furrowed his eyebrows and chuckled.

"So I heard," he said.

I continued eating while the guys laughed and joked around with each other.

"Oh yeah, Heath, you mind helping me with my car? It's been making this weird noise, and I was hoping you could figure it out for me," Scotty asked. "Oh yeah definitely," he said setting his beer bottle down, and following Scotty out the back door.

Zane turned to me once they left. "I had an interesting conversation with Todd today," I said, chewing the chicken. "Todd? Like Todd Smith?" Zane asked, leaning his head on his palm. "That's the one,"

"...Well what was this conversation?" Zane asked.

I swallowed the piece of chicken I had in my mouth. I looked at him. "From this point on we're being honest with each other," I said. "I'm only saying this because I don't wanna break your trust, yaknow, like how you broke mine," I said, poking my elbow into his ribs. "Ow, okay, I get it. What did you talk to Todd about?" Zane asked, in a slightly jealous tone. I blinked slowly, then sighed. "He admitted his love for me," I said.

"He said he wanted to wake up next to me everyday,"

Zane's cheeks glazed over.

"Who knows, maybe I'll make out with him for one of his videos," I joked.

"That's not even funny," Zane said.

"You know what wasn't funny?" I asked.

"Yeah yeah, I get it," Zane said, waving his hand in the air.

I turned my body toward him, and put my hands on the sides of his torso, and gave him a dumb cheesy smile. He looked over my face. "You're stupid," he laughed.

"But really though, I had this really vivid depressing dream I was dating him. It was super creepy," I said, turning back to my chicken. "Oh so now you're dreaming about him?" Zane asked, sarcastically holding his arms out in defense. He could even keep a straight face when I looked over at him.

I laughed and looked at him. We grew quiet.

"Will you just kiss me already?" he asked. I smiled softly, and leaned into him, kissing him softly and slowly.

"I love you," he said.

"I know," I replied, smiling at him.

He pushed my face away, softly, laughing at my stupid sarcastic remark.

I finished up my chicken, then headed upstairs, since I worked in the morning.

I stopped half way up the steps, and turned to Zane. "Oh yeah, since I'm carrying our child I can't lift heavy boxes so you're gonna have to unload all my stuff from my car and unpack it," I said. "Ahh- Bryn!" he yelped as I walked up the stairs.

"Pregnancy, and kissing another girl pass!" I yelled from the top of the stairs case.