The guilt.
The pain, worthlessness.
The thoughts and voices.
All torture, to the life I'm trying to live.
To the person I'm trying to be.
The noises, the voices. The threats, the choices. They hinder my future. They burden my blue skies. I can't grow, because of these lies.
That's all they are. Lies and noise. But that has never stopped it from reaching my ears. From settling in my heart and festering. Growing and growing til it's too much to be able to chop down.
People don't understand my mind. My thoughts and Choices. They don't understand that to me, wanting to be free is like a burden that can not be taken. Yet that's a burden I'm willing to take on.
The Anger and bitterness is what keeps me going. Keeps me as I am.
To stay inside and be ready to burst, is what wakes me in the morning.
To not want to cause physical harm to people is what has me walking, running.
To think of such bad, is what keeps me talking, smiling from time to time.
To be broken on the inside, is what makes me look whole on the outside, make my eyes shine just a little brighter.
And the cold... is what makes this heart beat.
