50 shades darker

chapter 9

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"loren, he said i can't see her," i groaned. loren had kept telling me to ask the doctor again if i could see natalia.

but he had made it clear i wasn't in a good state to walk and see her in the nicu. and since she's premature, she can't be going around the hospital bc of bacteria.

"this is just bullshit, you could walk so what's the big deal of just walking to the nicu? she's your child." she said.

"loren, i don't know why, but he told me i just can't see her so let's just get over it already" i looked off to the side feeling this pain in me, knowing i can't see natalia.

"this is all my fault" she said and fell back in the hospital chair, letting out a big sigh with it.

i looked over at her and sat up straight, "this isn't your fault loren —" she cut me off "it is my fault! if i wouldn't have told you about joey being here none of this wouldn't have happened and you would've had a normal baby".

"a normal baby" i mumbled looking down as tears started to form. "no i didn't mean it like that" she said realizing what she had said.

"just—get out. i wanna be alone" i said and turned my back facing her. "please i—"

"loren just go" my voice cracked. she remained quiet and left the room.

all this dumb worry over a guy who's practically showing he doesn't care for me anymore.

i should've known better and believed everyone when they had told me he was cold-hearted and only cares for himself.

all those times he told me he loved me were all just lies.

i always knew he was the bad guy. not to mention a gang leader, the funniest part of it all.

he married a sociopath who kidnapped my child in order to get him back— let's not forget when she sent a guy to kill me.

but instead shot joey, how convenient.

it's all just crazy how one minute i'm sitting in his office nervous as hell wondering if i'd even qualify for the job. then the next minute i'm in a hospital room, just delivered his second child and finding out he's never loved me.

crazy right?

i heard a knock but didn't bother to even see who it was or say anything. "hey" i heard a low voice.

i recognized it and it was charles. "i have a surprise for you" he said.

i sat up and faced his way, noticing joey was in back of him. i mentally rolled my eyes but all of a sudden this weight was thrown off of me as i noticed joey was strolling this small cart with a machine attached to it towards me.

i looked over at it and saw natalia sleeping peacefully in the little card with this small little mask around her nose.

"why does she have the—" joey cut me off "she was born with breathing problems so they have her on this machine till she can breathe normally" he answered.

i didn't care to look up at him but felt he was looking at me. "can i?" i asked.

charles nodded and slowly picked her up, fixing the tubes before laying her completely in my arms. i looked over her little face examining her very similar features of her father.

"how did you guys—" charles cut me off, "well you obviously know joey has his ways around the hospital so he gave a little something to a nurse that allowed her to be brought here to you" he said in an annoyed tone looking at joey.

i looked at joey and he had a smirk on his face as he looked at charles. "wipe that smirk off your face whore" i told him and that smirk quickly went away.

"you don't even know what i did" he
snickered. "i'm sure it has something to do with the waist and down" i said looking down at his unzipped pants.

they both looked down and joey quickly zipped them back up, "like i said, whore."

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