"Everyone who is able will learn how to protect themselves." Rick began. Deanna stood next to him, nodding along with his orders. "We do not know if this group will find us but if they do, we need to be prepared." Rick explained. We were all gathered near the gates. Even some of the children were in attendance. We needed to have a plan.
"When I first assembled this community, I knew eventually we'd have to know how to protect ourselves. The group was small. Which is why I knew Spencer, Aidan, and a few others could take care of us. We grew in size and eventually, Rick's group came along. I have no doubt if it comes down to it, we'll be able to take this group on, but to be safe, I want us all to know how to handle a fight." Deanna explained. No one looked startled or scared, to my surprise. Everyone knew their duties. We needed to stay prepared even if a battle never occurred.
"I can teach how to shoot a bow." Daryl offered.
"I'll teach the kids how to shoot." Carl spoke up. Soon, others were piping up with skills they offered to share. Deanna was pleased and anxious. She herself did not know how to protect herself. She relied on her children.
"We can overcome this. In a few months, everything will be back to normal. Until then, lets just keep our guard up and stick together. Remember, no scouting, no runs. If those gates open, we'll have a problem." Rick explained. Everyone nodded and began to depart. Daryl and I found each other.
"Doing okay?" He asked me. I nodded in response. I almost forgot I kissed him on the cheek yesterday. I'm glad he was speaking to me. I felt bad I did that, but in the moment, it seemed right. "About yesterday, what'd you kiss my cheek for?" He asked. Spoke too soon.
"I was in the moment I guess. Felt right." I said truthfully. "I'm sorry if it was wrong." I said.
"I didn't mind." He looked at the ground and I smiled. "You know the other day, when I said you were a good friend?" He asked. I nodded. "I saw you slump. Like you were disappointed I said that."
"I was." I admitted. Do I really give myself away that much? "I'm going to go." I said quickly, before any more of the conversation could be continued. Why was I shying away all of a sudden? I never felt shy around Daryl. I walked back to my house and into the kitchen. It was lunchtime anyway and I was hungry. A few moments later, there was a knock on the door. I opened before checking to see who it was. Daryl stood on the other side.
"Why'd you run away from me?" He asked.
"I'm sorry, I guess I was just embarrassed. Afraid to admit anything."
"Afraid to admit what?"
"That I have feelings for you, Daryl. From the minute I saw you walk through the gates, I knew you were different. And when we became closer, you became a safe space. I like confiding in you. At first I thought I would be able to hide it but I don't want to. And I'm sorry if you don't feel the same way. You were a good friend to have." I was rambling. He just watched me talk for what seemed like forever. I instantly regretted saying all of that.
"You talk a lot when you're nervous." Was all he said.
"That's all you have to say?" I asked him.
"You know I'm not good with my words, Rowan." I knew that. We stood there in silence. I gave up. I began to close the door when Daryl moved his foot to prevent me from shutting it the whole way. "Can I come in?" He asked. I nodded. He followed me to the living room, and I sat on the couch, he was next to me. He started to speak. "I was abused. Merle and I both were. Scars down my back to prove it. When he was old enough, Merle joined the military, leaving me behind. But he had to do it for himself. I raised myself. Took a beating from my dad. Dropped out of school. I used to deal drugs, get some extra money so I'd eventually move out, but I never saved enough. Merle came back one day, we stayed at his dealer's house. Got in a fight. I got beat up. Merle laughed at me. Almost died that day. And then I realized I wasn't important to anyone. Life didn't matter. When this shit started, I didn't care if I found my brother dead or alive. When it came to it, I'm glad he had to die." I didn't realize I grabbed onto his hand, and he held back.
"Why did you tell me this?" I asked sincerely. "I don't want you thinking you have to tell me everything if you aren't comfortable." I explained.
"You're the person I want to spend good days and bad days with, Rowan. Even if all the days seem bad." This time he looked at me. "I want you to know my past. Because you care and I care about you." He said simply. Before I knew it, we were leaning closer to each other. Months have gone by while I waited for this moment. Our lips touched. It was passionate and long overdue. I held his face in my hands and pulled him closer, never wanting to pull away. Finally, we pulled apart and my forehead rested on his.
"Thank you." Is all I said, in a whisper. For the first time, I saw Daryl truly smile.
