Help Me

Keeping Up Appearances

Mikey

He must've been going insane, surely?

There was no way that Rye would... Was there?

Mikey couldn't stop thinking about it... Whatever it was.

But he knew what it was. He knew. He just didn't want to voice it... As such.

Rye had been leaning in to kiss him. Mikey wasn't an idiot. But there were questions that came along with that truth.

Did Mikey want Rye to? He knew he'd closed his eyes. He knew he'd been anticipating it in the moment.
But what about that fear he felt as Rye carried on leaning in?
What about the relief he felt when Rye abruptly stood up?
What did that mean?

And if that was the case, then... Did he like Rye?

Mikey coughed as that thought crossed his mind, sat in the passenger seat, and he watched his mum eye him oddly.

Stop it...

But he wouldn't.

Did he like Rye in that way?

His eyes wondered up to the rear-view mirror, flickering away when he saw Rye looking right at him. Rye looked completely normal, like... Rye. He wasn't acting any different. Didn't look any different.

But Mikey knew that was a lie.

Because he knew Rye, and his secretive ways. How he kept to himself a lot of the time, relying heavily on that carefully constructed wall he had built around himself.

Mikey had seen that wall briefly in the mirror, and that was it.

What would his mother think? Would she be ashamed of him?
Hang on... What did he think about this? Did he want to pursue this? Is this what he had been feeling this whole time, and he just hadn't seen it until now?

But he remembered his mother words from when he called her that morning.

"You like him, don't you?"

He'd reacted then in confusion, and he did the same now. Did he like Rye? Of course he did, as a friend... But as something more?

Mikey was torn... If he made the wrong decision here, things between himself and Rye would be irreparable. But wasn't that a risk that everyone took when they started contemplating a relationship? Didn't everyone go through this?

But he seriously doubted that anyone had been as emotionally drained, confused, and desperate than himself in that very moment.

What would the boys think? Would they care? What about Blair? Would he hate him finally?
The Roadies... Would they stop supporting them?
What would happen if him and Rye...

Mikey shook his head as Jackie parked the car.

Is this what he wanted?

***

There was a silent agreement between both Mikey and Rye the second Jackie left the car to go and buy a ticket. And the silent agreement was that they had to act like nothing had happened this morning.
He'd met Rye's gaze intensely as he turned his head to look in the backseat, and saw how Rye's lips trembled. Not enough to be noticeable, but it was there.

The second they saw Jackie on her way back they exited the car, already immersed in a conversation.

They knew that if they avoided each other then Jackie would be asking questions. And Mikey knew that neither himself nor Rye could answer them. Hell, they hadn't even had a chance to talk things through yet, to talk about what had happened.