Sincerely, Mike

MARCH 21 2012

MARCH 21, 2012

Dear Billie,

You bastard fucking son of a bitch.

You rose from the dead like Jesus fucking Christ himself.

I honestly...am at a loss for words here, dude. We seriously had a fucking casket picked out and everything.

Needless to say, this was the miracle of the fucking century.

I still can't believe it, Billie Joe.

I can't believe I'm gonna see you again.

Face to face.

In this life.

Incredible. Absolutely. Incredible.

Great as this all may be, let's not forget that even more incredible and likewise even more cause for celebration is the fact that you've fucking made it here.

You did it, buddy.

You're 100% detoxed. You're done with physical treatment. You're alive. You've made it to your discharge date. You're breathing. You're gonna come home, you're gonna see your kid grow up. You're gonna live to see Green Day go so much farther than we ever did before.

For the first time in your life, you can finally say that you've kicked addiction's ass.

I know there's still a long way to go from here, therapy and physical recovery and whatnot.

But trust me when I say that I will never, ever, turn a blind eye on you again.

Trè and the guys and Spazzy and everybody else and I are all gonna be right beside you the whole way down the path to recovery, no matter how bad it might get. I'm gonna walk to the ends of the goddamn earth to make sure you never feel the need to reach for the bottle ever again.

I'm gonna be a better friend than I ever was before.

And I'm gonna make sure you stay kicking addiction's ass until it fucking kills me.

That, I can promise you.

I am so fucking beside myself knowing that so long as you remain stable for the next week- and I know you will- you'll be able to come back home and recover physically surrounded by the people who love you most.

Even if you can't do anything, won't be yourself for a long ass while, and will have to be under the constant vigilance of a nurse, I'm still beyond excited by the fact that I'll even be in your living presence again.

I really, really just can't believe it.

I know, I know-I sound like a broken record.

But I was hoping that if I wrote it out enough times, something would finally begin to click.

And I think it finally is beginning to do so.

Shit, Billie Joe.

I really just cannot wait to fucking see your face, hear your voice, talk to you, see you with your son again.

This really is the biggest relief in all of human history.

Hard as I worked on it, I am more than happy to throw that fucking eulogy into the eternal flames of hell and never think about it again.

And I'm sure Trè feels the same way about that stupid casket.

I am so utterly fucking relieved to know that I will never- at least not for a long, long time- ever have to face the grim reality of a life without you.

And what's more, to know that I will never have to live with myself for never being able to sort out or give you the apology you deserve to hear.

I won't bombard you with all that heavy shit right away. Honestly, for right now, I think we all just need to take a moment to step back and think about how lucky we all are to be here at the moment, especially when things were on the literal brink of going in the complete opposite direction.

But when the time is right, I look forward to fixing the mess my failure to act and I made, this whole trainwreck on paper that was my attempt at correspondence, and determining where we go from here.

All of that aside, I just want to take this moment to tell you that I am so incredibly proud of you.

You've beaten all the odds.

You have literally conquered death.

You did what you yourself and so many others always said you couldn't do.

And look at you now.

Sure, it may not feel like such a great thing right now, but you've certainly come a long way.

And you've accomplished something worth celebrating.

You are most definitely someone to be proud of.

Even if you've never thought that a day in your life before.

Trust me when I say that you truly are a worthy cause that I and so many others will fight for to the death.

And one day, I hope you will, too.

Keep on fighting the good fight, buddy.

We'll all be here right beside you, helping you fight it until the very last round.

Take it easy, Billie.

See you soon.

Sincerely,
Mike
-
Short, sweet, to the necessary point.

I'm really excited for the final chapter and epilogue! So much cuteness and a subtly sad sense of optimism await.

Enjoy, y'all.
~Jay